Fail several thousand times, go to a bar and find someone to tell your life story to, and then you will have walked in the shoes of someone who finally doesn’t give a $#!t.
no don’t stop it. all rivers have to flow to the sea.
get it out of your system. ie. write, draw, act, etc. keep it up and you could get paid to be a drama queen!
Think rationally. Obviously you have identified the problem, now when something happens and you start overthinking it remind yourself you are just over reacting and try to think of 3 best case scenerios for each bad one. Good luck to you!
Tragedies are not the only kind of dramas. It may be an acquired taste, but you could learn to like other types of situations. Or put more effort into seeing through illusions, waking up from dreams, valuing the truth.
Dr. Jackson wrote:
Fail several thousand times, go to a bar and find someone to tell your life story to, and then you will have walked in the shoes of someone who finally doesn’t give a $#!t.
I think I’m on my way to just that if that’s how it’s going to work… except maybe the bar. Thank you, this has helped.
MarlinTheFish wrote:
no don’t stop it. all rivers have to flow to the sea.
get it out of your system. ie. write, draw, act, etc. keep it up and you could get paid to be a drama queen!
I’m not sure we’re talking about the same thing here…
AshLynn wrote:
Think rationally. Obviously you have identified the problem, now when something happens and you start overthinking it remind yourself you are just over reacting and try to think of 3 best case scenerios for each bad one. Good luck to you!
3 best case scenarios for every bad one… I’m going to try that, thank you!
president mindhealer wrote:
Tragedies are not the only kind of dramas. It may be an acquired taste, but you could learn to like other types of situations. Or put more effort into seeing through illusions, waking up from dreams, valuing the truth.
Interesting what of looking at things. How would I begin knowing what exactly is an illusion and what is real? How would I know what the truth is?
Chi The Cat wrote:
How would I begin knowing what exactly is an illusion and what is real? How would I know what the truth is?
Just like you’re already on a quest to know the truth about everything important, but you could raise the priority of that. There’ve been times in my life when “Truth” was obviously my most important value, and other things that tend to distort the truth weren’t as important.
president mindhealer wrote:
Chi The Cat wrote:
How would I begin knowing what exactly is an illusion and what is real? How would I know what the truth is?
Just like you’re already on a quest to know the truth about everything important, but you could raise the priority of that. There’ve been times in my life when “Truth” was obviously my most important value, and other things that tend to distort the truth weren’t as important.
I think that we’ll almost inevitably do the wrong thing even if we learn the truth behind something beforehand… because even though we know the truth we can’t possibly understand it until we experience it. You know the stove is hot, but you won’t understand what ‘hot’ means until you touch it. So I think we are doomed to get burned no matter how much we try to learn before hand.
Chi The Cat wrote:
president mindhealer wrote:
Chi The Cat wrote:
How would I begin knowing what exactly is an illusion and what is real? How would I know what the truth is?
Just like you’re already on a quest to know the truth about everything important, but you could raise the priority of that. There’ve been times in my life when “Truth” was obviously my most important value, and other things that tend to distort the truth weren’t as important.
I think that we’ll almost inevitably do the wrong thing even if we learn the truth behind something beforehand… because even though we know the truth we can’t possibly understand it until we experience it. You know the stove is hot, but you won’t understand what ‘hot’ means until you touch it. So I think we are doomed to get burned no matter how much we try to learn before hand.
Maybe but if you wish to not make up so many lies and illusions to feed your inner drama, you could choose to put similar effort into being able to clearly think, feel, see, and know the truth. This is just an answer to your question posed in this post. You don’t have to try it.
Chi The Cat wrote:
MarlinTheFish wrote:
no don’t stop it. all rivers have to flow to the sea.
get it out of your system. ie. write, draw, act, etc. keep it up and you could get paid to be a drama queen!
I’m not sure we’re talking about the same thing here…
you have strong, overwhelming emotions?
you can’t just turn them off. you can’t just fight them. you have to work with them. and when that happens, they lose their hold on you and then the truth is easier to see.
MarlinTheFish wrote:
Chi The Cat wrote:
MarlinTheFish wrote:
no don’t stop it. all rivers have to flow to the sea.
get it out of your system. ie. write, draw, act, etc. keep it up and you could get paid to be a drama queen!
I’m not sure we’re talking about the same thing here…
you have strong, overwhelming emotions?
you can’t just turn them off. you can’t just fight them. you have to work with them. and when that happens, they lose their hold on you and then the truth is easier to see.
How do I know if I’m working with them for fighting them? What is the difference?
everyone has their own methods. (write, draw, act, therapy, etc)
you know you’re on the right track because you don’t feel so crazy. :P
I think the first step is taking a deep breathe and acknowledging the obvious… “ok, I’m tired.” “ok, that made me mad.” “ok, I’m getting steamed now!” there is no road map for where you go from there, because once you get there, the moment has changed again.
you train your brain to think differently. Your brain thinks the way it does because it believes it has to or it is just how it has always gone. First you have to figure out what you want. “think differently” or “don’t think that way” is not a command that the brain can compute. The brain is an action organ. There must be a clear action to take. It can’t do a don’t.
Try something like,
“How do I find more peace in my life?”
“If I could have more peace in my life how could I do that?”
“If I could have anything I want, what would that be?”
I can’t tell you how many times most people who are in a somewhat lost situation don’t have a clear decision in a way that is so real to them they could taste it, about what they would have if they could have anything. With nothing holding them back, what would they have. What would the ideal be.
Once that is clear, start asking, “If I could make this happen how would I do that?”
Most times people seem to be looking the wrong direction. They are talking about how things don’t work and how it hasn’t worked saying the whole time, “why aren’t things working?”
A thought.
I have good news everybody. Last night somehow I suddenly realized that things are not as bad as I thought they were, and this ugly thing’s hold lost its grip on me. I still feel bad that this happened. And I feel bad that this person wasn’t the man willing to do what it takes that I need, that instead he turned out to be a boy believing in a disney fantasy (he thinks relationships should never have problems). I think that’s what’s making me sad, but there’s nothing I can do about it. He’ll just have to eventually learn from his own loveless life.
I know somewhere out there, there is a man who is willing to do what it takes and doesn’t go running at the slightest bit of imperfection in a relationship. I’m just sad that this wasn’t it, but it will pass.
Anonymous
#
10 months, 2 weeks ago (1 day, 3 hours after post)
If you’re afraid of the water, swim.
That’s the best way for me to overcome fears or ward off doom-scenarios. When I feel like walking in the rain is going to ruin everything because -insert million reasons-.
I go walk in the rain to prove it wrong.
Dr. Jackson
MarlinTheFish
AshLynn
mindhealer
lairm