so what will you do except talking to your dad?
as of right now, im being passive and letting life takes it course. as well as trying to get over the fact that he does not act like my father, nor does he treat me like his son. im kind of going back on my words that i literally just typed in the main post…but tonight im most likely going to bring up all my frustrations with my dad. the last time this happened he told me to go to hell etc etc etc i got in my car and did a burnout up our street. p.s. he is a cop in the town we live in, he left me with my mom for wisconsin with his new wife and son(my first little brother)when i was 4 years old.
i dont know why i posted on here, i dont even know what help im looking for.
i know 1 thing about every parents:they love their children from heart.try to do some action to attract him to yourself.just listen to him advices for a limit time.he will be good with you.
Hope to live in peace and quiet .
i disagree with everything you just said. but i really do appreciate you taking the time to try and help. take care :/
CodyCorona wrote:
i disagree with everything you just said. but i really do appreciate you taking the time to try and help. take care :/
you too,i just told my personal experience with my dad.
hope to solve this important as soon as possible.
Send him a sympathy card:
Dear Dad
I’m so sorry for the pain and anger you have caused over the years. I sure hope you can forgive yourself soon.
Your Son
Then write him off for a while. A few months of silence on your end may make him think about things. Maybe not. Either way, the ball will be in his court, and you need not feel responsible for the choices he makes.
What are you looking for you asked? Father’s approval you will never get, no matter what you will do. He will write you off all the time. You tried and tried. Now it is his turn to try. Give him time and space, it is what he wants from you anyway. Bringing up his weaknesses, faults and mistakes would put more oil on the fire. Do you live with him?
Dragon_Lady wrote:
Send him a sympathy card:
Dear Dad
I’m so sorry for the pain and anger you have caused over the years. I sure hope you can forgive yourself soon.
Your Son
Then write him off for a while. A few months of silence on your end may make him think about things. Maybe not. Either way, the ball will be in his court, and you need not feel responsible for the choices he makes.
if only all of you knew my father, me writing him that would lead to disaster.
be a gal wrote:
What are you looking for you asked? Father’s approval you will never get, no matter what you will do. He will write you off all the time. You tried and tried. Now it is his turn to try. Give him time and space, it is what he wants from you anyway. Bringing up his weaknesses, faults and mistakes would put more oil on the fire. Do you live with him?
my stepfather is more like a father to me. im not pointing out is faults and weaknesses, im pointing out what he is doing that is making me feel this way. he spends thousands and thousands of dollars on things that arent a necessity, and when i ask him for a little bit of help with community college classes, he says no go get a second job. im not asking him to pay for school, im asking for help. i cant even get financial aid because him and my step mom make so much money. i cant give him space when i live with him, and he tries to have conv. with me all the time, if i were to just let it be and avoid him, hed get pissed. my dad controls everything, this is why him and my mom got divorced. how in the world would you know what he wants? have you talked with him lately? no.
Well, you’ll be able to get financial aid in a couple of years, because you’ll no longer be under the umbrella of their finances.
I agree you’ll most likely never get his approval. Ever. You are not going to get his financial help, you are not going to get his love. It’s just not going to happen.
Seriously. I’d just write him off. “So sorry for YOUR LOSS” and let him go.
Be a son to our stepfather, and give him the attention and consideration you have tried to reserve for your father.
i understand what you are saying…its just so hard when i have my two brothers here (the oldest of my younger siblings)…i moved here to be closer with them and go to school(change my life) but i cant afford school. im close now with my brothers, if i just write off my dad…i fear that the relationship i have with my brothers will fall because of it. my dad lives in wisconsin and my mom and stepdad live in california..i cant just get up and leave… i have to have a job lined up before i can move.
I understand. Do try to keep your brothers in your life, even if that means having to tolerate your dad more than you would like.
One day Dad will be gone. But your brothers will still be here, and they will be all you have left.
And don’t blame them for his lousy choices.
i dont blame them for anything, i never have…minus them leaving my video games layed all over the place.
i dont know what to do.
Can you get some counseling or something to help you clarify what you want and need?
thats more money that i dont have.
Sounds like you need to keep your distance, I fear this will only esculate into something far worse if you dont.
Both of you need to find some middle ground.
If you feel youll lose your siblings because of this then talk to them first before you make any hasty decisions.
Your dad sounds extremely pig headed, also very controling. (Not a nice combination to put up with)
TTFN, that last line…you are incredibly yet sadly correct. my brothers love me, as i love them. i wouldnt let him keep them from seeing me, nor would my brothers…especially my 15 year old brother jacob. i texted my dad just now asking him if hell be home today, and that i need to talk with him.
Try to keep your cool, if he doesnt want to listen to you this time dont take it as a personal attack,its his way of showing he’s the alpha male.
I hope things work out for you, Cody.
Ill be thinking about you. x
thank you very much, i strongly appreciate your help. if he avoids it, then thats the last i will talk to him about it, and it will solidify my choice about not living with him anymore. thanks again, and i will try and update you tomorrow sometime. xx
well….everything i didnt want to happen…did happen :[
CodyCorona wrote:
well….everything i didnt want to happen…did happen :[
I too am sorry,Cody. Whats your next move now?
This reply has been removed.
Some people just do not care and never will. My dad walked out when I was two, payed child support regularly for the next 16 years and never once tried to have any kind of relationship with me. As an adult I actually attempted to have one with him and quickly realized what a mistake that was. It has taken me a couple of more years of not hearing any word from him to realize that he truly does not give a flying fig. I just had my second son and he doesn’t even know he exists. He doesn’t know either of my children and probably never will and I have to be ok with that. You can’t change other people, only yourself, and through that you can hope they someday set aside their pride/ignorance and follow the example. It takes two people to make any relationship successful and it sounds like you have tried to do your part. Like others said, the rest is up to him. Choose to not let it affect you anymore, because it will only create more resentment on your part and make your life miserable. Be better than him and choose to be happy.
why are you hiding your face
whats his problem is he gay or something
okei! wrote:
let it go. let him go.
♥ Fairytale ♥
Dragon_Lady
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