depression help: For the past few months Ive been struggling with depression.

sunsetboulevard9

For the past few months Ive been struggling with depression.

With work, school, training for competitions and family matters I’ve found myself stressed out to the point I cant cope. I’ve been having thoughts I shouldn’t have and at this point don’t think I can keep it to myself any longer. Getting professional help at this point isn’t an option. I’ve been trying to bring myself to talk to somebody I trust (which for me would be my coach), but every time I promise myself Im going to reach out for support I stop and think “wow this is just pathetic” and end up chickening out. When I can pull myself together, I try and convince myself that it’s less of a burden to reach out and find someone to listen rather than have the burden of my actions if I didn’t do something about it. I guess at this point I just don’t trust my judgment… I have my moments where Im ok and seem like Im thinking clear and then I have my moments where Im really, really low and my judgment is bad. I know I can’t cope on my own anymore. I feel really alone and it’s just getting worse.
Is reaching out the right thing? Or will I just be a burden?

This open post was written 9 months, 3 weeks ago | V/U/S: 425, 9, 3 | Edit Post | Leave a reply | Report Post

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Since writing this post sunsetboulevard9 may have helped people, but has not within the last 4 days. sunsetboulevard9 is a verified member, has been around for 11 months and has 3 posts and 19 replies to their name.

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Professional, family matters, depression, Every Time, Reach Out, Reach Out, training, Judgment, anymore, support (How Tags Affect Reciprocity)

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HelpBot 2 #
San Francisco, CA, US | 9 months, 3 weeks ago (0 minutes after post)

If you are contemplating suicide, hurting yourself, or you are seriously depressed: please, seek professional help!

Call this hotline (1-800-273-8255) operated by our friends at the
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Snar 73 #
An Undisclosed Location | 9 months, 3 weeks ago (5 minutes after post)

Reach out. The first step to overcoming problems is admitting you have weakness. If you can’t own up to your own weakness it will ALWAYS rule you.

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jasonegani #
An Unknown Location | 9 months, 3 weeks ago (30 minutes after post)

talking to someone professional can never hurt, and if it does, that person is bad, dont go back. but talking to someone that you trust and can get good feed back is the key. relax and talk, its the best think you can do at this moment..
You are not alone.

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sunsetboulevard9 4 #
An Unknown Location | 9 months, 3 weeks ago (36 minutes after post)

Thanks for the replies :) It’s just frustrating. I have a tendency to hold things in when talking to people. They can ask me how Im doing and my reply is always “Fine”, or they ask me how I feel about something and I always reply “Nothing”, “I don’t know” or “Don’t care”. It can be really hard for me to open up, thus I hesitate.

Snar 73 #
An Undisclosed Location | 9 months, 3 weeks ago (44 minutes after post)

sunsetboulevard9 wrote:
Thanks for the replies :) It’s just frustrating. I have a tendency to hold things in when talking to people. They can ask me how Im doing and my reply is always “Fine”, or they ask me how I feel about something and I always reply “Nothing”, “I don’t know” or “Don’t care”. It can be really hard for me to open up, thus I hesitate.

Expression is the only way to find freedom. I lived a long time locked in that bubble you are in, and I retreat back there a lot. It isn’t worth it. You think you are being strong but really its weakness, the ultimate weakness. Submission to your very self.

You can get better. You will get better. Its the choice to move forward or keep yourself locked up.

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sunsetboulevard9 4 #
An Unknown Location | 9 months, 3 weeks ago (57 minutes after post)

That’s exactly what it feels like, i just keep giving into myself…staying inside my comfort zone. I don’t want to keep myself prisoner like this anymore. If I do, I’ll end up gone and buried.

Snar 73 #
An Undisclosed Location | 9 months, 3 weeks ago (1 hour after post)

sunsetboulevard9 wrote:
That’s exactly what it feels like, i just keep giving into myself…staying inside my comfort zone. I don’t want to keep myself prisoner like this anymore. If I do, I’ll end up gone and buried.

Then listen to what people are saying here, and have probably said elsewhere. Its ok to get help. It really is.

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sunsetboulevard9 4 #
An Unknown Location | 9 months, 3 weeks ago (1 hour, 3 minutes after post)

You’re right. Im going to meet up with my coach to talk & go from there. I can’t keep living like this.

Snar 73 #
An Undisclosed Location | 9 months, 3 weeks ago (1 hour, 14 minutes after post)

sunsetboulevard9 wrote:
You’re right. Im going to meet up with my coach to talk & go from there. I can’t keep living like this.

Good! I wish all the best, and by the way this is a great place if you ever need help or just to vent.

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For the past few months Ive been struggling with depression.

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