This post left anonymously
So desperate, depressed…
I am in high school and I live with my mom and my two sisters. My mom’s life was never great and a lot of the bad things that happened to her happened to me, too. My mom had an abusive father and a drunk mother. She was also sexually assaulted. I think I was molested when I was very little by the neighbor boy who was also my age. (5 or 6) My dad walked out on me and every other man in my mother’s life was either abusive to her or me and was involved with illegal things. My mom has postpartum depression yet acts like she has bipolar disorder, too… she’s either angry or really upset. Today she told me that she feels lonely without her boyfriend ever being around because of work. My mom doesn’t drink or do drugs, she’s just lonely and has made some pretty stupid decisions in her life. I feel like I can’t succeed or do anything right without feeling guilty. I want to be able to leave my house not being worried about her or feeling obligated to keep her company, I am her daughter, not her friend. I want her to get help. The way she acts upsets me and makes me feel worried, afraid and so depressed myself that even the littlest things agitate me and make me want to kill myself. I get angry easily, upset easily and it’s upsets me to think that when I walk into a room with my mom in it that I have to leave right away because I feel like we’re going to end up fighting or I’m going to see her upset. I was never diagnosed with anything because I never went to the doctor but I feel like I have OCD and I know that I have panic disorder and anxiety. My mom says that she feels like she can’t breathe ever. I just want to be happy and not feel guilty about my mom’s life and not feel suicidal anymore. I don’t want to see her cry. Help, please
Since writing this post Anonymous may have helped people, but has not within the last 4 days.
Invite Others to Help
A logged in and verified Help.com member has the ability to setup a Friends List and invite others to help with posts.