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Is it normal that your partner never asks about your past?

We’ve been together for long and I was always interested at what he did in the past, I was asking questions about his education, work, friends, relationships… he never asks me anything. He knows some basic stuff about my past I told him and which everyone knows anyways. Is he not interested or just doesn’t bother to ask? Is that normal for a guy?

This open post was written 10 months, 2 weeks ago | V/U/S: 600, 11, 7 | Edit Post | Leave a reply | Report Post


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Education, questions, friends, Partner, normal, BASIC, work, guy (How Tags Affect Reciprocity)

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Dr. Jackson offline Verified User (5 years, 1 month) Long Term User Shouts: 43 #
An Unknown Location | 10 months, 2 weeks ago (2 minutes after post)

In my experience that’s not really a good sign of a healthy relationship. How long have you really been together?

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Anonymous #
10 months, 2 weeks ago (2 minutes after post)

4 and a half years

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Dr. Jackson offline Verified User (5 years, 1 month) Long Term User Shouts: 43 #
An Unknown Location | 10 months, 2 weeks ago (6 minutes after post)

Yeah that’s a pretty long time for him to not care. I think other opinions are necessary before I say more, but I’d be careful about any longer term plans with him. If he doesn’t care about your past, whats to say he’d care about his children if you ever decide to have any.

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d.rhys.morri offline Verified User (1 year, 9 months) Long Term User Shouts: 0 #
An Unknown Location | 10 months, 2 weeks ago (47 minutes after post)

you might just be really lucky with a guy who is ok with stuff that may have gone down, or someone who realizes that asking questions might result in undesireable answers. If he loves u and is interested in building a future with u. count urself lucky

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Anonymous #
10 months, 2 weeks ago (57 minutes after post)

That’s exactly what I am wondering about: is he not interested in knowing because he doesn’t care (I mean that in a negative way) or is he just so fine with everything that it doesn’t matter to him and he doesn’t want to ask questions (the sorta positive way)

Is there any way I can determine the difference without having to ask him directly?

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Dr. Jackson offline Verified User (5 years, 1 month) Long Term User Shouts: 43 #
An Unknown Location | 10 months, 2 weeks ago (1 hour, 5 minutes after post)

Could try asking his friends and family if he’s always been like this.

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Anonymous #
10 months, 2 weeks ago (1 hour, 41 minutes after post)

Good idea. I’ll do that.

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monkichirmo online Verified User (4 years) Long Term User Shouts: 1 #
An Unknown Location | 10 months, 2 weeks ago (1 hour, 52 minutes after post)

i don’t think it’s so odd, mine’s the same way. there’s nothing wrong with asking him directly btw, as long as you’re not pointing fingers nor assuming anything.

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southern_comfort offline Verified User (7 years, 1 month) Long Term User Shouts: 37 #
An Undisclosed Location | 10 months, 2 weeks ago (1 hour, 52 minutes after post)

Your past is just that… YOUR past. He wasn’t a part of it so he finds no connection or need to know about it. No big deal really. If he cares about you he will be more interested in “our” future. Yours and his together.

If you have fond memories of your past than keep them. Silently keep them.

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The Sherlockian offline Verified User (5 years, 2 months) Long Term User Shouts: 24 #
An Unknown Location | 10 months, 2 weeks ago (2 hours, 16 minutes after post)

Gentlemen do not probe into a lady’s past. Ladies do not gush all over the place about their past.

The past is gone. The present is lost as it arrives. There is only the future.

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nolateri offline Verified User (11 months, 4 weeks) Long Term User Shouts: 1 #
An Unknown Location | 10 months, 2 weeks ago (7 hours, 45 minutes after post)

Well Spoken! I vote for this answer!

chev.jame wrote:
Gentlemen do not probe into a lady’s past. Ladies do not gush all over the place about their past.

The past is gone. The present is lost as it arrives. There is only the future.

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