Kind help: What happens to a romantic if they don’t get affection? - Help.com

Romantics are usually the ones who DO the romantic stuff, not the ones that receive it. They’re the ones that line the walkway in the house with rose petals, and scare firemen half to death by putting candles everywhere.

If they don’t get any, they create it.

http://www.5lovelanguages.com/learn-t…

everyone has a different love language. (the way they express their affection/love for others) some people do it physically, some do it with words and talking, others with gestures.
because not everyone is the same, not everyone gives the same gift. meaning not everyone gets the treatment they might find most desirable. if you’re boyfriend isn’t giving you the affection you desire, it might not be because he doesn’t want to, it might be because that isn’t the way he expresses his love to others.
but thankfully, love isn’t something you’re just born with, it can be learned. The things you would like to receive from your significant other can be things you ask for, not things just naturally given. the only problem is when a spouse or significant other refuses to treat you the way you want, not that they didn’t act that way in the first place.

http://www.wikihow.com/Get-Your-Signi…
here is the best advice wikipedia has to offer :)

Allthemessylove. wrote:
http://www.5lovelanguages.com/learn-t…

everyone has a different love language. (the way they express their affection/love for others) some people do it physically, some do it with words and talking, others with gestures.
because not everyone is the same, not everyone gives the same gift. meaning not everyone gets the treatment they might find most desirable. if you’re boyfriend isn’t giving you the affection you desire, it might not be because he doesn’t want to, it might be because that isn’t the way he expresses his love to others.
but thankfully, love isn’t something you’re just born with, it can be learned. The things you would like to receive from your significant other can be things you ask for, not things just naturally given. the only problem is when a spouse or significant other refuses to treat you the way you want, not that they didn’t act that way in the first place.

http://www.wikihow.com/Get-Your-Signi…
here is the best advice wikipedia has to offer :)

That’s all very nice sounding, and probably true to a degree, but it has nothing to do with people who are Romantics. Romance has very little to do with love, and more to do with creating a mood or image. It’s kinda like how some people just enjoy camping. There’s a mood that gets created when you sit around a campfire with friends and family, roasting marshmallows, etc. There’s something cozy about it. Romantics just enjoy the mood of romance.

So, while expressions of love are probably a lot like what you mentioned, expressions of romance are highly conditional.

Hey. I love being romantic, but my husband is not. I have kind of stopped being romantic because I feel he doesn’t like that kind of stuff, but I do other things now that he will appreciate, so I guess I’m learning to show my love in other ways. Like if he has worked all day I will not let him touch the dishes. I try to get a lot of the housework done and so on. I want to be more romantic again, but it’s hard to do when you feel the other person doesn’t even care, you know? Also I really don’t know of anything I could do to give romance because it has been so long…

Allthemessylove. wrote:
http://www.5lovelanguages.com/learn-t…

everyone has a different love language. (the way they express their affection/love for others) some people do it physically, some do it with words and talking, others with gestures.
because not everyone is the same, not everyone gives the same gift. meaning not everyone gets the treatment they might find most desirable. if you’re boyfriend isn’t giving you the affection you desire, it might not be because he doesn’t want to, it might be because that isn’t the way he expresses his love to others.
but thankfully, love isn’t something you’re just born with, it can be learned. The things you would like to receive from your significant other can be things you ask for, not things just naturally given. the only problem is when a spouse or significant other refuses to treat you the way you want, not that they didn’t act that way in the first place.

http://www.wikihow.com/Get-Your-Signi…
here is the best advice wikipedia has to offer :)

I just bought that book. I’m off to read it because it sounds more interesting after reading your post.

Blest wrote:
Romance has very little to do with love, and more to do with creating a mood or image.

So, while expressions of love are probably a lot like what you mentioned, expressions of romance are highly conditional.

if romance has little to do with love, then I guess I don’t understand what romance is. I thought it was a form of expressing love through sweetness and passion, but I guess it isn’t.

Anonymous wrote:

Allthemessylove. wrote:
http://www.5lovelanguages.com/learn-t…

everyone has a different love language. (the way they express their affection/love for others) some people do it physically, some do it with words and talking, others with gestures.
because not everyone is the same, not everyone gives the same gift. meaning not everyone gets the treatment they might find most desirable. if you’re boyfriend isn’t giving you the affection you desire, it might not be because he doesn’t want to, it might be because that isn’t the way he expresses his love to others.
but thankfully, love isn’t something you’re just born with, it can be learned. The things you would like to receive from your significant other can be things you ask for, not things just naturally given. the only problem is when a spouse or significant other refuses to treat you the way you want, not that they didn’t act that way in the first place.

http://www.wikihow.com/Get-Your-Signi…
here is the best advice wikipedia has to offer :)

I just bought that book. I’m off to read it because it sounds more interesting after reading your post.

tell me if it’s good or not! :)

Allthemessylove. wrote:
if romance has little to do with love, then I guess I don’t understand what romance is. I thought it was a form of expressing love through sweetness and passion, but I guess it isn’t.

It is, and it isn’t. Romance is conditional. It depends on the candles, the flowers, the mood that is created. If the mood goes away, romance vanishes instantly.

To give a very, VERY extreme example, imagine that you have a hotel room with flowers, candles, low lighting, soft music, and silk sheets. Two people are really getting romantic, and then one goes into the kitchen to fetch a bottle of wine. They open up the cabinet and find a dead body that’s been broken in half, shoved inside one of the cabinets. I don’t care how much of a romantic you are, that’s going to kill the mood. All the flower petals, music, and gentle music in the world isn’t going cause a romantic recovery.

However, when you find that dead body, and you call the police, and give them your statement, the two of you still love each other, and comfort one another. It may not be romantic, but it most certainly is LOVE.

Another example might be that you could be having a fight with your husband or wife. Now, even though you don’t really like the other person at the moment, you still love them. If your wife thinks you’re a jerk, she’s not going to be in the mood for romance. But she still loves you.

Do you kinda see what I mean now? Those are probably terrible examples, but they’re all I can think of at the moment.

Id like to do romantic stuff but i wouldnt feel too bad if someone doesnt do something back since usually cute stuff is romantic to me just the same as long as i enjoy being with someone thats nice. I do however suffer if im not with who i like at all.

No matter how romantic I get, regardless of situation, Coco responds not at all.. oohhhhh, the frustration!