heart help: How to stop being in love with someone that is so right for you, but yet so wrong? - Help.com

If you really love each other then you should be together, whatever paths your lives are taking you should work through them together. Maybe work on your path first, then his or vice versa. You only get one soulmate, don’t throw it away because your paths aren’t the same. Merge them together and if you love each other you’ll make it work. Good luck.

Your question first.. how do I stop being in love with someone… You don’t. Time, I suppose, will lesson your feelings but love doesn’t have an “on and off” switch. Just doesn’t work that way. You can quicken the “time heals all wounds” process but only if you ELECT TO SEVER ALL TIES with this person. If you try to maintain any sort of contact or relationship, you will just get your little heart broken everytime you say “good-bye.” It’s like a cut on your hand…leave it alone and it will heal but if you keep scratching at it… it’s going to be painful for a long, long time.

Now, I have a question: Why? If you both feel the same way about each other; then WHY? Child, love is so much more important than a command of the english language or social status or anything else. What good is a stable career if you grow old, alone and lonely. To love someone, to care about another person more than you care about yourself and have that person feel the same about you…is right up there in the ‘life’s greatest gifts’ category.

Life is so short and, in the grand scheme of existence, all of these little issues are so unimportant…

I suspect that you are both just trying to do what is best and what is right.. but, perhaps, being together is truly what is best and what is right.

I am so sorry. this is a sad situation. I don’t know if you can stop your feelings, but you can control them. I do understand how sometimes love does not conquer all. To make the pain go away faster, you will have to stop interacting at all for a while at least, until your feelings cool off. and meanwhile, you need to find a way for your MIND to cope with the feelings from your heart. this will sound so stupid, but in a similar situation, everytime I spoke to or thought about the person, and started to feel the longing, I would hum a stupid, funny tune in my head, or even play the whole song in my head. this eventually made me associate feeling like that for them with being foolish. I don’t know if this helps, but it worked for me.

Sometimes love is not enought to sustain a relationship.
And I don’t know how possible it is to simply fall out of love with someone. If you believe that you truly made the right choice and there is no other way to go about it you need to give yourself time.
There are no guidelines to falling out of love. Grief has it’s own timetable and it’s different for every person.
Good luck!

In my experience, you never really stop loving someone. Love doesn’t just go away. I am curious as to why you feel you have to be apart though. You choose your own path in life - if you are in love and happy together, choose to be together. If he’s going to school and you are working, it may be a little rough, but with a few sacrifices it can be done. Don’t just walk away from each other because of a few obstructions…work around them, sweetie. Life is too short for regrets.
However, if you are determined to break up, the best way to recover is to take some time away from each other. If you stay in constant contact, you won’t be able to heal. It’s not really possible to go right from in love to just friends. Maybe after some time has passed, but not immediately. Hope this helps.

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I think you must talk to him about that situation and finish the university.
Good luck.