marriage help: my boyfreind says after our marriage he will take my salary too and and give me an allowance . - Help.com

you’re very correct, and you’d be correct to suggest you keep your funds seperate.

Don’t agree to marry under those conditions… sounds like a very greedy controlling man. I would not allow him to take my hard-earned money…

well, you now have a choice. Keep working and get your own source of money (don’t make him pay all the bills though) or stop working, be a stay at home Wife/Mom and mooch off of him. up to you.

ok im going to tip toe here.

are u good with money? i know a few women that are horibal with money and need to have a alowance. now u dont sound like this kind so im going to ask strait out.

why dont both of u talk about buying stuff and putting your money togeather!
now yes this can lead to problems like,i want a BIG screen tv{to be fair}or i NEED more makeup. but to let him put you on a alowance is just bull. that should not be alowed and u should not take it from him. yes u may love him but that love may/will die in time if you feel like he is taking advantage of you!

You talked with your guy right, so what reason is behind him taking your salary? i am a woman who may not perfectly deal with issues on budget but for a man to tell me he’s going to take everything and would just give me allowance is a red signal.
Issues on budget should be talked about the two of you. make sacrifices for the home IF both parties are willing. :o)

thats not right. tell him that. if you are going to get married make sure that is not in the plans

Tell me, you did laugh at him right?

The warning bells should be going off in your head the minute your boyfriend said that he will take all your salary and give you allowance.

You are not a child. Your boyfriend’s attitude is yelling that he would treat you like a child and that he could not trust you with your own money.

I don’t understand why you wanted to marry this man because from the sound of it, he is trying to control you via your salary. This is not right.

I urge you not to let him do that. If he continues to insist on taking your salary away from you, then I can only advise you to walk away.

The marriage is not all about money. It is about love and trust. He doesn’t sound like he trusts you with the money and it is possible that he would spend all your money with an exception of a small allowance that he will give you.

This is not love, my friend, and this is not trust either.

This is the advice I can give you - don’t give him your money that you work hard for.

He may just not be a good sharer but you tell him he better learn real quick cause a marriage is a partnership. If he cant do that then he is not mature enough to get married.

God **** right is wrong!, i mean if he wants to be so “traditional” like the man takes care of all the financial things what he should do is make you not work, that way the allowance thing works. But if he is doing it because he is saving for the both you, he should also do the same with his money. And make it an equal thing, just plan the expenses like the gas for the car, the water bill, the electric bill… and of what its left of both your money take a part and put it in a savings account for both of you, then you can slip it into an allowance for both of you.

I think this is the best solution for both, unless there is something else which you are not implying that can help us see why he thinks is fair for you to get less than him.

Hope my answer helped you and others!