hand help: This is a poem I wrote years ago. - Help.com

wow, that was really scary. It’s a very good poem, sent shivers down my back.

Yes i did, but it was the feeling of being stuck and the possibility of drowning that frightened me. It was really deep and it put you in that position where you felt that you were stuck and bleeding. don’t worry it’s a good thing.

Your very welcome.

sounds like hard work mate.

very cool its like a story/poem

Hi David,

You know my thoughts and feelings on your poem from the night you shared it with me. See, I told you it was good and people would like it.

I’m happy you shared it with everyone here.
Take care.
Jonetta

Excellent job, David. You’ve given a great picture of powerful existential forces, finely parsed and deliminited. What a service you have been; a pathfinder through the dangerous caverns of life.

God bless you.
Matt

Freestyle poetry is exactly that. It is a type of poetry that has no set pattern or style. Most of the time, freestyle poetry rhymes. Since most poetry is freestyle and rhymes, most people are under the false immpression that if the verse dosn’t rhyme, it isn’t poetry. Freestyle poetry can be fun to write. None of it has to make sense so it can be humorous. It can also be serious and have a lot of depth to the subject. This is a very flexible style of poetry and that is why a lot of different people enjoy writting this type of poetry.

Hi David,

I just realized I made a mistake in my reply above. I wrote “deliminated”. Last time I checked, that wasn’t even a word. I should have said “delimited”. Sorry about that.

In any case, what I meant was a like the way you broke up the stream of experience into multiple discrete thoughts and then recomposed them. I like the way the narrative flows. I have a tendency to leap from one mountain-peak to the next in my writing without taking the time to cover the intermediate ground. I often times just expect people to “get it”, so I really admire how you were able to actually take the reader by the hand and lead him through the cavern. Very well done.

I see it now, yes. It really unfolds a richness of metaphor.

That was a cool poem :)

Well, thanks for sharing, you see it is the creativity, you would like the food, which you cook, the poetry is not the readymade food, we take the words and give feelings to each word. You wrote because you felt it. How about it singing it, you may try, the metaphor will help you to make so many other poems as if sprouting of the flowers from you one poem as a plant. Even if you are not a poet, you sow the seed and got it, just imagine singing it. I would express that sing it in the way as if it is county song, the songs that people in the rural areas sing as a folk song.

Well, you see if you may sing in the company of your friends, it may be a great joy. The crticism is just exihibition of knowledge, but when a child speaks few words, mother understand what it means. This is the same with all creative arts, particularly the poems, the few words, the drop from the sea to show to the mother, the self-feeler readers and or the listeners. They enjoy it as they can feel the words, I liked your poem, but I will not torture you to read my poem, however, I want to, so here it goes, please bear it:

“Epilogue”

We see and hear
This is start of learning
We touch and smell
This is middle of learning
We taste and speak
This is end of learning, Wait!
It is the start of self-study
We learn and do
This is the end of self-study Wait!
We do self-study to learn
This is the beginning and the end.
Let us start self-study
Let us go inside and outside
To learn all about
Our selves and others
In the small age of human civilization
Let us take a drop from
A sea of self- education and
Let us do self-study and learning
Before the drop of life vanishes, believes Bhagouauty,
Into the endless dimensions
Of time and human civilization.