Love help: I did something stupid today. - Help.com

dude we all like to play with peoplelike that sometimes but it was entirely your fault im sorry to say. you led her on. have you tried apologising and saying that she is an amazing girl but your not ready for a relationship, theres too much going on in your life right now, even though you do care about her a hell of a lot it would be best for you both to stay friends? or something along those lines. lol.

I want to say something encouraging, but if I was your ex I’d be so hurt if I knew your motives.

Friends that good should be made into spouses. Be careful that you aren’t playing the biggest psychological trick of all on yourself! The older you get, the harder it is to give yourself a big kick in the rear. So do it as soon as possible.

You know what they say…If you play with fire you are going to get burned. Are you still as stupid as you were before you played with the fire? I hope not…and I hope you still have some shrted of credibility with your ex because otherwise you are toast.

she doesnt know it was me, she thinks it was her…. thats why im feeling so guilty

tell her then

What exactly did you do? I know you think you mind-tricked her into it, but I wonder how well text-book examples apply to real life.

If I was you, I’d be ready to expect the full force of the consequences for what you have sewn. If you break it off and manage to come up with a reason that doesn’t make you look like a complete jerk, then you may retain the friendship.

If you come clean that it was all a rouse from the get go, then I expect you’ll be leaving that conversation with one less friend, a sore cheek, and a lesson learned (I’d hope). All which you probably deserve for being so manipulative.

soccer24/7: I cant do that, it would kill her
Bluecat: I wish I could think I was wrong, but she is the most unlikely person to ever want to do that to me. And its not really textbook, I worked out most of it myself.
Jeff: I know your right I just dont want to admit it :-$ I think im a nice person at heart (I hope) i just dont think enough about consequences, I didnt even want it to go that far. I honestly wish I could undo this.

Well said, Jeff.

If you want to be laughing about this years from now, you’d best lay the right kind of ground work for your relationship: honesty.

You would do well to fully explain what you did and hope the expression your true remorse over it stops her from tossing you away — which is something you’ll have to rightly accept if it comes to that.

Lying your way out of it will work for a time but is poison in the relationship well and will eventually kill the town. (MetaphorMeter rates that at a 4/10. Oof)

Thanks for your help. Do you think I should tell her now while she feels unstable or later when she cools down. I think I could probably do the same thing again (making her feel calmer when i told her) but that would be just as bad as lying to her wouldnt it? I guess i should tell her properly and take what I get but when and how?

My ex did the same to me. He said that he was so depressed and that he never wanted to leave me, and i started to cry and believed him. That very same night, he said he had no idea what he was doing and that he didnt mean it. He told me flat out, and yea it hurt that he toke advantage of me like that, but i still do care for him, and i want to be there for him no matter what. So moral of the story… be honest and if she is as good a friend as you say she is, she will probably be pissed, but then forgive you. BUT MAKE SURE SHE KNOWS IT WASNT HER FAULT! (thats where it went wrong for me) and tell her as soon as possible, just let her know that you are there for her

-Carolina

Thanks for your advice Carolina, I will.

Personally, I’d wait 24 hours to let some perspective seep into the issue.

i see your side of it, guy. youre just an innocent manipulator-type pawn in the great psychological chess game of life.
i hate to be harsh, but really, guy, you deserve everything you get.
sorry

Lesson learned dumbass. Not to say I haven’t been a dumbass a few doezen times in my life ~grins~. Don’t **** with peoples minds if you don’t have to! ~smiles~. Especially people you claim to care about, if it were an enemy then at least it would have some validation.

Just learn from it man, eat your medicine and move on ~smiles~. Sometimes we make dumbass mistakes, but we can’t let it cause fear in our lives. If you are sincerely sorry and have expressed that and learned from your experimentations, then it should be water under the bridge and you have cleaned up your end of the street ~smiles~.

just keep in mind that this girl is hoping above all else to be with you. and when you do something like this, she thinks its going her way. only to be shot down yet again when you tell her the truth. let this be a lesson for you, she is a person. with feelings, hopes, and desires. Dont treat her like an animal by using her as a piece of ***. by coming to get help on the situation, you have proved that you are a good person. or at least you want to be one. so tell her the truth, and forgive yourself.

-Carolina

It’s fun to try out a little psychology on others but you went to far!
I think you should stop playing around with others feelings if you can’t stand the consequences. if you are uncertain about your feelings towards her you can’t be in love with her, even if she means a lot to you. I think people usually know when they’re in love!

hi i am Brianna i was going out with this boy named Jeff and i dont no we just stopped talking but i hear from his friends that he still likes me and he is always looking at me and smilling but he wolnt talk to me and i feel like i really really need to talk to him and so i called him but he did not answer his phone do u think i should go up to him and try and talk to him face to face???????

theres always a little bit of truth in all the things we do, even if you are kidding while doing them. I think deep down inside u may still like her, but not know it. think about it. is there still chemistry? it seems so…

you def need to apologize..that is messn with her mind and it could be very damaging..so apologize..you cant be friends with her bcz youve hurt her enough..she needs to move on.