Love help: I have been with my girlfriend for 4 years. - Help.com

I think you need to be more confident about yourself first.
Believe you are the one she is in love with. It will not change because she is getting slim, or other guys are checking her out.

Sorry to tell you this, hon, but what you have described is not love. It is possessiveness, and it is your problem and your girlfriend has chosen not to make it her problem. Posessiveness is the quickest way in the world to kill a relationship, because love is given, not taken, and true love only happens when TWO people give themselves to each other freely, without concern for what will be received in return.

Im telling you dude she is missing you more than you are missing her. DO NOT call her! ignore her as much as you can. Its good thing that your reading books to stop being jealous. give her a week or to and she will come running back at you. I been there b4.
good luck.

Im in a similar situation. I think fireman might have the right idea here.

You guys are thinking like guys. Ordinarily, that would be okay, but if you want to understand a woman, or even just get along with her, you have to see things from her perspective sometimes. If there is anything a woman hates more than jealousy, it is a man acting like he owns her. Like it or not, Dragon, her body belongs to her. Besides, if you really love her, you should be glad she is losing weight for her health’s sake.

I think she realized that your actions were unhealthy and were making her unhappy, so she broke it off with you. The only way she’ll come back, if she does (and probably will eventually), is if you almost don’t care if she comes back- she wants to be so happy with yourself that you don’t NEED her. Then, if you are truly okay on your own, it will improve not only your life and wellbeing, but it will allow you to truly love others. I am struggling with very similar issues, check out my posts! and trust me I know the only way that you can keep her happy is to keep yourself happy first!! PS: She’s confused and THAT is why she’s confusing you ;-) Let me know if I can help! It’s good to know someone else is working on this stuff too-

dragon, im glad fireman could help us both and i agree with faithfull. I also havent spoken a word to my ex in two days and i keep getting random phone calls. Faithfull is on to something important though, i beleive the less you actually want to see her , the more she’ll start popping up.

****** Dragon. I told you to ignore her dude! dont answer her phone calls give it a week or two and see what happens. trust me.

when u see her at work just wave and move on, do not talk to her, text message her. and ignore the phone calls dont let her get more than 2 words out of you at work or school.

good luck

If you need more time, honestly, and it sounds like you might, then if you don’t take it now- when it’s easier, you’re still going to have to take it sometime- and that would probably entail breaking up if you wait to take it later! It’s important that you are honest with yourself right now- taking a couple weeks to get your stuff together may seem like forever, but it’s an investment in Your wellbeing-

yes take a week or two…and stop with the answering phone calls, dont let her see how weak you are without her. be strong dude turn that phone off.

I’m going through the same thing, only my son and his girlfriend, she has 2 kids that are disrespectful. My son wanted her gone. Now he wants her back and accuses her of everything and calls her constantly. Tears her down with negative things about her and if she doesn’t answer the phone or text him back he gets verbal with her,,,,She tells me that is the way it was except for the verbal but accusing her of seeing other men…She tells me she loves him but she doesn’t want this anymore she has her own place now and he can’t stand that………I care a lot for this girl excepting her as a daughter,but she does spoil her oldest child to extremes and she can’t see it, he just turned 14 and already taking off and her not knowing where he is, the youngedt 7 screams and hits all the time…my son has 2 girls from a previous marriage and they say that the boys are hitting them and want their things to play with. This girl works the same amount of hours that my son does and she came home and cleaned and cooked and did laundry….while my son played WOW on the PC,which she got tired of…….i don’t know if this relationship will ever work out to either of them..he says he loves her and she says she loves him…….He wants her to give up the house and move back, and she says why so he can make her move again, and nowhere to go again, she did sign a lease on this for a year