school help: How does one separate from their family? - Help.com

What exaclty is so bad about your family? Can you give some examples?

Look up colleges you want to go to, away from home and look up scholarships that you can apply for. Apply for as many scholarships as possible and work from now until you go to that school and save every penny, do not splurge on anything. Move to that school, they’ll prolly have dorms. You could check into if they have a work study program where you work for the school and earn money. Dorm living is definitely much cheaper than apartment living. Stay in the dorm as long as possible. Get a part time job while you’re in school if need be.

Oh yeah, I forgot, don’t tell your family or anyone they might ask. Don’t call or email them. But I have to warn you, a family can be a very nice thing to have. At one point I thought of getting away from my family too. I had a very elaborate plan.

The fact that your parents aren’t taking into consideration of what you want is crazy. Maybe you could talk to your school counselor or trusted teacher as to what you can do and help you out with your plans. What kind of career are you thinking of chasing?

If you’re in IB, you should be able to get some really good scholarships to any school you want.

You are very smart, you can do what you need to for yourself without being manipulated into it. Your right, you need a plan and you’ll need to follow through, I don’t necessarily think you have to hide away from your parents to it. But if you can get to a campus and put a couple of miles between you & them it’s not such a bad thing. They will in time give you space, your grand parents aren’t very supportive for you, they seem very competitive, like they are sooo way better then you can ever be, that must be very discourageing, I’m sorry that they are that way to you. When you go to the college, adults I don’t think are as critical of you, they are alot more accepting of how you just are. You will have plenty of friends then. you have alot to look forward to and time is on your side, make a good solid plan and go for it. Best of luck to you.

It is a tough situation you are in. It is difficult to seperate from a family that is so controlling, but sometimes space and time is necessary for you to discover who you are and what you are capable of. It sounds like you are ready for some independance. Your parents should not decide what you are to do with the rest of your life, nor should you have an obligation to support your family. It sounds like in some ways you are a close knit family and you don’t want to push them too far away and then regret it. The majority of families are crazy. I live across the country from mine, which is difficult but in some ways it helps keep me sane. You are still in high school so there is no reason you need to make any rash decisions at this time. Go to college and get some space away from your family then decide what you should do. School conselors should not judge you because you want to go into oriental medicine, but too often they don’t have the time to build proper relationships with students. Is there any adult outside your family that you feel a bond with?

Just to keep it simple, why not go to med school far, far away from your parents? I’m going to bet that when your parents aren’t breathing down your neck you might like them a lot more. If not, geographical distance can lead to independence, since after school you can locate anywhere you want and it won’t be as stark a contrast as if you lived at home when you went to college.

Do what you plan on doing, and stick with it. If it’s oriental medicine, then so be it. As far as I’m concerned, a person should do exactly what it is they want to do, not be stuck with some job they hate day in and day out. You certainly do not want to become one of those people who look back on their lives and weep because they didn’t achieve their goals.

Please, learn from my mistake. Since the seventh grade, I wanted to be a cartoonist. My father, however, felt that it wasn’t a lucrative enough field to attempt, and insisted I went to a regular college first. Five years later, I’ve switched schools and am now doing something that I would much rather do: writing. While it isn’t cartooning as I initially planned–as I have all but forgotten how to draw–I am still very happy with my current decision, and plan on becoming a not-so-lucrative novelist.

Furthermore, I understand how it is to be in a home with overbearing parents. I can’t say I’m exactly looking forward to leaving them totally behind, it sure will be nice when I’m out on my own, hunting for publishers and such.

Simply put, do what it is you were meant to do. No compromise. No regrets.

Oriental medicine! Good for you! Your family may not realize how much potential there is in a career path like that, but I think you’re on a wonder path!

You should definitely apply for as many talent based scholarships as possible. It’s work, I know, but it will really help you. Definitely follow your own path. Once you’re out of the house and going to school, you will find it easier to discover yourself and your passions and leave the restrictions of home behind. You won’t even need a detailed plan as long as you just get out of that house and start living! Go to school for what you want to do. You can even sign up for school the first year stating that your degree is going to be pre-med, even if that is not your ultimate intention. Most college students change their majors multiple times anyway and that first couple of years are really only general ed classes, so it won’t be a big deal to change your declared major in another year or two. You won’t have missed out on anything.