friends help: ***********worried about a friend************* - Help.com

Agaa
offline Verified (2 years, 9 months) Visit Agaa's shoutbox
GB

***********worried about a friend*************

Im starting to sound a bit of an attention seeker now hehe. Right i have a problem- well otherwise would be helping someone :) my best friend has recently started hanging around with this other kid. this other kids social life consists of sitting in a childs park lighting fires smoking, taking drugs, and drinking with a group of other people. i think my friend may be influenced by this behaviour but he has strong moral values and tells me that he most definately will not be pushed into something purely becaus eof influence though he says this its happened to him before and when i bring this point up he practically bites my head off (metaphorically) is there anything i could do to make sure that hes ok and that he does not get into anything serious or worse in trouble with the police. ME and this friend have been through everything together and im worried he may get hurt thanx for help in advance
jay

This open post was written 2 years, 2 months ago | V/U/S: 223, 4, 2 | Edit Post | Leave a reply | Report Post


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Since writing this post Agaa may have helped people, but has not within the last 4 days. Agaa is a verified member, has been around for 2 years, 9 months and has 5 posts and 76 replies to their name.

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-Lee- offline Verified User (2 years, 2 months) Long Term User Shouts: 50 #
An Unknown Location | 2 years, 2 months ago (36 minutes after post)

hello there, it’s happening to me too, long time ago.
and for my personal opinion, you’re doing good to be his friend even he practically bites your head off hahaha :)
just want you to know, people always gonna change, it’s human nature, sometimes people just ‘need’ changes (habit, friends, anything) but that doesn’t mean their feeling for you is change.
Just be there for him when he needs you and be his best friend like you always do and also stay doing a right thing like you always do, ok :)

Love and sunshine
~Lee

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pseudoniem offline Verified User (2 years, 4 months) Long Term User Shouts: 2 #
Den Haag, 11, NL | 2 years, 2 months ago (58 minutes after post)

My suggestion would be to trust your friends judgement for now. If he will be able to keep his principles, everything will be all right. If he won’t, there is little you can do about it now, except be ready to spot the change out to him if it happens and supporting him then. It is good that you worry and want to help, but there are some things people will have to find out for themselves.

There are a number of reasons why people would do drugs, experiment, set fires et cetera. One of them is curiosity. If that’s the case, things usually work out fine once the novelty wears off.
Another one is peer pressure. He already has one friend who doesn’t approve, so he has a chance of resisting this. If he cannot, there is very little you can do right now. Just point it out to him if he does something he said he wouldn’t do, it might make him realize he’s giving in to pressure.
Another option could be he has real problems, like problems at home, emotional problems, psychological issues, difficulties with trust or fitting in et cetera. People in these situations may seek a way out, an escape. If he has any such problems, try to support him in those and get help, that’ll decrease the risk of him acting out in the ways you describe.
The last option, he might actually like the scene. It could be that some of these guys are great, the fires harmless and the drug recreationally and not abusive. If that turns out to be the case, just be watchful he stays in control and it won’t transform into something ugly.

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Agaa offline Verified User (2 years, 9 months) Long Term User Shouts: 2 #
GB | 2 years, 2 months ago (1 hour, 5 minutes after post)

thanx lee that really did help it did make em see sense i was kinda wondering what he may say to me as well and if i dissapprovede would he really listen or just think im trying to stop im being happy and am just jealous though both suggestions from you are helpful thank you so much to both of you it did help thanx!!

jaymie

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-Lee- offline Verified User (2 years, 2 months) Long Term User Shouts: 50 #
An Unknown Location | 2 years, 2 months ago (1 week after post)

You’ll be alright :)
and
you’re very welcome, anytime :)

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