Love help: I Lose Myself. - Help.com

I Lose Myself.

I was just guessing, numbers and figures,
Pulling the puzzles a part,
Nobody said it was easy,
I’d like to die. I seem to live to cry.
A vicious cycle, cathardic and torturous.

It’s such a shame for us to part,
I am so sorry, nobody ever said it would be this hard,

Oh take me back to the start.

I scream and I smash my head against it,
Rythmically, methodically, planned, wanted,
I say horrible malicious things,
“You have to run or it’ll get you”, - “I know, I am so sorry. This time I want it to get me. I’d quite like to know what happens.”

I am smart.

You see both sides,
The positive and negative collide,
Matter and anti-matter,
A terror - ist attack in your very own head,
You’re so smart.

“You’re going nowhere. I know you thought you weren’t, and I know that now you think you are but you aren’t. I am going to consume you, I am going to kill you. This is the way your reality breaks, the illusion becomes you. You are pathetic, how can you believe in yourself and positive thought? When it has never paid off for you before? And if it has, you know, you know I’ve always gotten you. Again and again and again and again and again and it’s going to tear you into horrid little bloody pieces and you’re going to die again and again and again and again and again. I love you. I am doing this because I love you.”

Gutless,
I am gutless.

Running in circles,
Chasing tails.

Let’s go back to the start.

On the train, nada surf,
I am surfing on the train, in the subway,
It thrills me, it stirs the atoms of my soul and let’s them fly,
I think I know that person in that seat,
I am not going to talk to him, because he might embarass me.

I laugh because I leave the tv on standby at night.
They think it is off, but it is still on.
It’s on standby.
If you listen you can hear the high frequency hum still radiating from that eletric monitor.
It burns your mind,
It is burning their minds.
I am killing them with the television,
My plan.
My brain cells are calling me to turn around and stop their slaughter.
I have to help them!
I’d rather be slow.

#J((@TPE+WTE_W ?
If I had a gun,
I would not use it.
I would not use it I would not use it I would not use it I would not use it I would not use it -
BANG
Lies.

I am a liar.

I make sure I am a good man, I am good to everyone, I tell the truth to everyone.
I lie to myself.

And myself hates myself for lying to myself.
Myself is a murderer, and he would like to kill myself.

I am still running away with you…

Its all the same.

Last plane to leave, because it is a back seat clause,
I love you more. I love you more!

“What do you want?”
“I don’t know”
“So **** off,”
“I am so sorry I wasted your time”
“Thats okay”
BANG

I loved you more.

Ny batteri
Hllaofpla ny ii

..zsan ry i reason.

There is no reason.
There is no reason.
There is no reason.
There is no reason.

Bl Ntt Yfir Mr,

Night over the sky,
Appeared out of the window,
Me with hands,
I think about my day,
My blue nighties,
To bed,
Covers over soft,
Eye are closed,
Head under, the covers,

The elf stares at me.

The elf is horrifying.

Hreyfist Ekki,

It runs at me,
But it never touches me.

The elf is a murderer.

This open post was written 2 years, 2 months ago | V/U/S: 583, 18, 5 | Edit Post | Leave a reply | Report Post

Elf, Love, Head, lie, reason, night, Plan, run, Ist, kill, depression, suicide, dying, poem, Literature, death, Dream, hurt, pain, Grief, Melbourne, life (How Tags Affect Reciprocity)

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