Updates to this post /post/149729-i-dont-know-what-to-do-about Sun, 12 Oct 2008 17:35:12 +0100 /post/149729-i-dont-know-what-to-do-about#reply-3616516 You have to ask yourself, is it better for them to grow up with one parent that is a good role model, self sacrificing and all that a parent should be, or to have a negative father figure around that is possibly a drug abuser. Also, cheating is a pattern. Studies show that discord is far more damaging to children in their developing years than an absent parent.

]]> Anonymous Thu, 10 Apr 2008 04:36:29 +0100 /post/149729-i-dont-know-what-to-do-about#reply-3615245 First of all, I have all the respect in the world for you. Raising two children isn’t easy let alone all of the other stresses you have affecting you. The fact that you can hold it together on a daily basis for your kid’s sake shows that you are a strong woman.
And you’re right. Your children always need to come first in your life. I know that you are afraid on what they will miss out on if their father is no longer a daily part of their lives, but just think of all of the things that they may be involuntarily exposed to (drug abuse, alcohol, etc.) if you do allow him to continue this behavior and be around your children. Also, I know that they are still very very young but they can feel the stress and tension, just maybe in a different way than you do. It just doesn’t seem like the ideal environment to bring up your kids.
Also, it is always important for you to continue to seek happiness in your life. You do not sound happy. If this is a man you intend on marrying you should not have to censor your feeling and concerns in fear of outlash. If you do truly love this man then offer to help him through his problems. Be a support system, and strong when he needs you to be (maybe even when he can’t be for himself.)
What it comes down to is do you want to live the rest of your life like this? If not, make moves. All you can do is offer your help and support, you can’t force him to take it. Sometimes tough love is the best kind. The longer you wait, the harder it will beome

]]> dbshell Wed, 09 Apr 2008 22:48:46 +0100