[Help] Finding breakup hard to cope with without friends. Updates to this post /post/159782-finding-breakup-hard-to-cope-with-w Sat, 11 Oct 2008 07:57:21 +0100 Reply from ghostteet /post/159782-finding-breakup-hard-to-cope-with-w#reply-3726389 littlenick, you wouldn’t believe how much that just helped me. thank you so much! i was smiling while reading it, it’s like you knew exactly what i was feeling :) i will go to college tomorrow with a positive attitude and hopefully attract positive friendships.
thank you!

]]> ghostteet Sun, 11 May 2008 20:48:31 +0100 Reply from littlenick /post/159782-finding-breakup-hard-to-cope-with-w#reply-3725840 You feel lonely because you are still trying to adapt to the break up. You have to give yourself time to actually find new friends. Friends sometimes happen spontaneously. Like if you happen to be a the supermarket, or in line at a movie theater, or in the park and you happen to pet someone’s dog.
Your friends before that were going the route of smoking weed and watching tv were not really friends. They were just people you knew who liked to smoke weed. As far as getting drunk but you’re still not at that age, even if you were I would not recommend it. When girls get drunk with guys or with other girls usually bad things happen that drunk girls will regret once they become sober girls the next day. Give yourself time to adapt and to become acquainted with yourself again. There have to be things that you enjoy doing by yourself. Write on your journal or start your own blog. Everybody is doin that nowdays. Reading a good book in the library. Going for a walk in park or the mall. These are places where your friendhsip halo will shine and you will see that you will meet new people soon. The school you attend. From your post I can see that you know people who know people. Don’t act negative. Positivity is contagious. But negativity is completely fatal. Then nobody will want to be around if you act negative.
I think when you had your boyfriend you made yourself unavailable to your friends because you thought you had to be exclusive with your boyfriend and you did not want anybody stealing those moments that you and your boyfriend could have by yourselves. It’s an unconcious thing. You do it but you don’t really know you’re doing it until you actually notice it yourself. Or in your case, now that you broke up. Cheer up. Show this world that you can be cheerful and happy.
As far as your mom getting sick of you, I don’t think that is entirely true. Your mom may be frustrated to see that you fell lonely and how you reflect it to everybody. She probably wishes she could do something for you to get you new friends or to make you feel less lonely. She probably feels you need someone your own age to relate to and she might need someone her own age to relate to. There are things you wouldn’t tell your mom that you would certainly tell a friend your own age and viceversa. Mom’s are there for us always. Tell her I said happy mother’s day. She could probably use a kind word today. Tell her how much you love her and are so glad that she is your mom. Tell her you are the luckiest girl to have a mom like her.
If you act dessperate, dessperate things will happen to you. Like you may make friends with the wrong kind of people. The local shoplifter is waiting for someone to understand her cleptomaniac ways and you in your dessperation to make friend would befriend her and before long you would be shoplifting too. Or, the weed smoking people you mentioned too. They look for someone to “infect” with their desease: weed smoking. No drugs of any kind are good for you. They only alter your mind and cloud your judgement and always get you in trouble.
There are people who prey on vulnerable people. Right now you are vulnerable and highly susceptible to anybody’s kind words. Don’t let that show. Don’t wear your heart on your sleeve. When people see that, they will be ready to take advantage of you. I hope that doesn’t happen to you. Give yourself time. Give yourself a break. Don’t knock yourself out before the fight begins. Face this world with a smile and be ready to make new friends.

]]> littlenick Sun, 11 May 2008 17:34:14 +0100 Reply from whitecamellia2 /post/159782-finding-breakup-hard-to-cope-with-w#reply-3725795 Breakups can be hard, especially without the help of good friends. I agree with the diary suggestion, it really helps to get your thoughts and feelings down on paper and out of your head. I’ve had a journal since I was in high school and I think it helps a lot.

I know it may seem daunting to go out and meet new friends, but it might help you. Making new friends really isn’t that bad. There are plenty of fun people out there just waiting to meet you! Try going to places where there are a lot of people, like the park or the library. Reach out to old friends and reconnect with them. Things will get better for you, I’m sure of it.

]]> whitecamellia2 Sun, 11 May 2008 17:11:47 +0100 Reply from Renegade_007 /post/159782-finding-breakup-hard-to-cope-with-w#reply-3725738 [quote ~lilies~]Not being able to relate with others in the middle of something painful is hard. Well, for starters you can work on a diary and pour thoughts you have there. I did that and it helped some too.

Go to nice places where you can relax.

Adapt a dog. You’d find unconditional friendship.

Learn a new recipe. You’d have fun experimenting

Join voluntary work. You would feel needed.

Get to have new friends. You will meet nice friends in good places.[/quote]
I agree 100% especially the volunteer work. You will meet people that really care and these are good unselfish people. Also you always have this site .and there are many great people here you can get to know and become great friends with. Whatever you do life does go on., and there is a better one in your future.

]]> Renegade_007 Sun, 11 May 2008 16:54:57 +0100 Reply from *lilies /post/159782-finding-breakup-hard-to-cope-with-w#reply-3725660 *adopt

]]> *lilies Sun, 11 May 2008 16:29:42 +0100 Reply from *lilies /post/159782-finding-breakup-hard-to-cope-with-w#reply-3725659 Not being able to relate with others in the middle of something painful is hard. Well, for starters you can work on a diary and pour thoughts you have there. I did that and it helped some too.

Go to nice places where you can relax.

Adapt a dog. You’d find unconditional friendship.

Learn a new recipe. You’d have fun experimenting

Join voluntary work. You would feel needed.

Get to have new friends. You will meet nice friends in good places.

]]> *lilies Sun, 11 May 2008 16:29:16 +0100