[Help] I'm feeling suicidal again and I don't know why.

The post was closed by Puck You

Puck You — Mon, 12 May 2008 03:56:18 +0100

Reply from Puck You

Puck You — Mon, 12 May 2008 03:55:43 +0100

Ok, I will.

Reply from Seen toomuch in life

Seen toomuch in life — Mon, 12 May 2008 03:55:18 +0100

Would you PLEASE keep in touch with me more???!!! I can help you through with the start up of stabilization of meds and any other questions you may have about being bipolar.

Take care of yourself, and

STAY IN TOUCH!!!!!!!!!!

:o)

P.S. And you’re VERY welcome, my friend.

Reply from Puck You

Puck You — Mon, 12 May 2008 03:54:49 +0100

I am feeling better now. Thanks for all your help!

Reply from Seen toomuch in life

Seen toomuch in life — Mon, 12 May 2008 03:52:35 +0100

Actually, I know so (that you would be able to easily spot and identify issues, and then help them out if only to give them a shoulder to cry on). And you would be helping them out with writing too.

Hey - that gets you 2 things that you love in life with 1 quick sweep.

NICE!!!!!!!!

Reply from Puck You

Puck You — Mon, 12 May 2008 03:52:26 +0100

[quote faolteine]Seen toomuch in life is right hun. it helps more than you know, just being able to sit down and talk to others and know you have been through similer sh*t makes all the diff.[/quote]

I know. That is part of the reason I want to be a counselor.

Reply from Puck You

Puck You — Mon, 12 May 2008 03:51:31 +0100

[quote Seen toomuch in life]Good girl!!!Don’t forget that you can either shout at me or e-mail me ANYTIME. I’m here for you!!I may be going through hell myself, but I like helping others out (especially you!!) and it gives me something else to focus on.P.S. The hearing is finally this week. I didn’t think it would ever get here.[/quote]

Thanks! Glad to hear about the hearing. Good luck!

Reply from faolteine

faolteine — Mon, 12 May 2008 03:51:31 +0100

Seen toomuch in life is right hun. it helps more than you know, just being able to sit down and talk to others and know you have been through similer sh*t makes all the diff.

Reply from Seen toomuch in life

Seen toomuch in life — Mon, 12 May 2008 03:50:20 +0100

Good girl!!!

Don’t forget that you can either shout at me or e-mail me ANYTIME. I’m here for you!!

I may be going through hell myself, but I like helping others out (especially you!!) and it gives me something else to focus on.

P.S. The hearing is finally this week. I didn’t think it would ever get here.

Reply from Puck You

Puck You — Mon, 12 May 2008 03:49:57 +0100

[quote Seen toomuch in life]You would probably be more in-tuned to the kids moods and be able to help them out if they are having personal issues (which is right up your alley for getting your therapist degree).I TOTALLY agree with faolteine - You would TOTALLY ROCK AT IT!!![/quote]

Yea, I would like to think so. I would like to think with all my experience in dealing with my own personal issues I would be able to spot others.

Reply from Puck You

Puck You — Mon, 12 May 2008 03:47:37 +0100

[quote Seen toomuch in life]Ok, first and foremost it’s REALLY important to take your meds at the same time each day. It can make a big difference with your moods. Especially if you’re talking about the difference between 7 am and 11 am.
********************
I REALLY like the idea of you doing a volunteer gig in mentoring. You would be perfect at it!!! And maybe you could get some college credit for it also.[/quote]

Ok, I’ll try to remember to take them at the same time everyday.

[quote faolteine]I could see you doing that. youd rock at it.[/quote]

Thanks!

Reply from Seen toomuch in life

Seen toomuch in life — Mon, 12 May 2008 03:47:14 +0100

You would probably be more in-tuned to the kids moods and be able to help them out if they are having personal issues (which is right up your alley for getting your therapist degree).

I TOTALLY agree with faolteine - You would TOTALLY ROCK AT IT!!!

Reply from faolteine

faolteine — Mon, 12 May 2008 03:46:02 +0100

I could see you doing that. youd rock at it.

Reply from Seen toomuch in life

Seen toomuch in life — Mon, 12 May 2008 03:45:01 +0100

Ok, first and foremost it’s REALLY important to take your meds at the same time each day. It can make a big difference with your moods. Especially if you’re talking about the difference between 7 am and 11 am.
********************
I REALLY like the idea of you doing a volunteer gig in mentoring. You would be perfect at it!!! And maybe you could get some college credit for it also.

Reply from Puck You

Puck You — Mon, 12 May 2008 03:43:50 +0100

[quote Seen toomuch in life]I remember your therapist wanted you to get out there and find something that would make you happy (and get you out of your apartment).Did you figure out anything yet?How about helping kids with writing issues (since you like to write so much)?[/quote]

I’ working on finding a volunteer gig in mentoring.

Reply from Seen toomuch in life

Seen toomuch in life — Mon, 12 May 2008 03:43:08 +0100

I remember your therapist wanted you to get out there and find something that would make you happy (and get you out of your apartment).

Did you figure out anything yet?

How about helping kids with writing issues (since you like to write so much)?

Reply from Puck You

Puck You — Mon, 12 May 2008 03:42:20 +0100

[quote Seen toomuch in life]Hey Alice - I’m so sorry to hear that you’re having a set back right now! Just checking, are you taking your meds at the same time each day? It does take time for your body to adjust to the meds.I know the feeling about life sucking. Have you found anything in your area that would give you more of a purpose to your day?[/quote]

Not that same time everyday but I am taking them everyday. I have yet to find something in my area that isn’t hockey.

Reply from Seen toomuch in life

Seen toomuch in life — Mon, 12 May 2008 03:41:06 +0100

Hey Alice - I’m so sorry to hear that you’re having a set back right now! Just checking, are you taking your meds at the same time each day?

It does take time for your body to adjust to the meds.

I know the feeling about life sucking. Have you found anything in your area that would give you more of a purpose to your day?

Reply from Hohenheim of Light

Hohenheim of Light — Mon, 12 May 2008 03:40:34 +0100

You could try live streams, youtube clips….

Reply from faolteine

faolteine — Mon, 12 May 2008 03:40:28 +0100

ok then talk to us. tell us about ur life?

Reply from Puck You

Puck You — Mon, 12 May 2008 03:40:04 +0100

My life sucks

Reply from Puck You

Puck You — Mon, 12 May 2008 03:39:46 +0100

[quote Commander Ikari][quote The_Alice][quote faolteine]ok hun im bi polar and it helps me to talk, do u have a friend to call, a dvd you love to watch, a hocky ring you could go 2?[/quote]No friends, all my dvds were stolen from me, hockey rink isn’t close[/quote]You could download something[/quote]

Actually no. On a public computer. :(

Reply from Hohenheim of Light

Hohenheim of Light — Mon, 12 May 2008 03:39:19 +0100

[quote The_Alice][quote faolteine]ok hun im bi polar and it helps me to talk, do u have a friend to call, a dvd you love to watch, a hocky ring you could go 2?[/quote]

No friends, all my dvds were stolen from me, hockey rink isn’t close[/quote]

You could download something

Reply from Puck You

Puck You — Mon, 12 May 2008 03:38:46 +0100

[quote faolteine]ok hun im bi polar and it helps me to talk, do u have a friend to call, a dvd you love to watch, a hocky ring you could go 2?[/quote]

No friends, all my dvds were stolen from me, hockey rink isn’t close

Reply from Puck You

Puck You — Mon, 12 May 2008 03:37:50 +0100

[quote Felicity-{KIMKRISS}]If you have plans for suicide,I hope you seek help close to you asap[/quote]

I will.

Reply from faolteine

faolteine — Mon, 12 May 2008 03:37:49 +0100

ok hun im bi polar and it helps me to talk, do u have a friend to call, a dvd you love to watch, a hocky ring you could go 2?

Reply from Puck You

Puck You — Mon, 12 May 2008 03:37:01 +0100

I could call the crisis line

Reply from faolteine

faolteine — Mon, 12 May 2008 03:36:14 +0100

hun im bi polar it helps me to talk things through etc. do you have sombody you could call, a dvd you like to watch, a hocky ring you can go 2?

Reply from MamaBear {Felicity}

MamaBear {Felicity} — Mon, 12 May 2008 03:36:12 +0100

If you have plans for suicide,I hope you seek help close to you asap

Reply from Hohenheim of Light

Hohenheim of Light — Mon, 12 May 2008 03:35:50 +0100

Maybe you should get out, take a walk, change of pace

Reply from Puck You

Puck You — Mon, 12 May 2008 03:35:04 +0100

I am at home and…no

Reply from Puck You

Puck You — Mon, 12 May 2008 03:34:46 +0100

I am thinking that it might be my bi-polar and that my meds need to be adjusted but…I dunno

Reply from faolteine

faolteine — Mon, 12 May 2008 03:34:41 +0100

ok where are you and do u have chocolate?

Reply from Puck You

Puck You — Mon, 12 May 2008 03:34:12 +0100

I’m feeling super depressed and I don’t know even know why!

Reply from faolteine

faolteine — Mon, 12 May 2008 03:33:27 +0100

ok hun tell me what your feeling what your thinking and get it all out, whats got you down etc.

Reply from Puck You

Puck You — Mon, 12 May 2008 03:32:33 +0100

Yea, I know. Thing is my moods swing pretty fast. I mean it was only 2 hours ago that I was feeling pretty good.

Reply from lifeisabeach

lifeisabeach — Mon, 12 May 2008 03:31:25 +0100

plus you might not wanna tell your parents you are suicidal but you might wanna hint to them you are depressed because they should at least know how you feel about things.

Reply from lifeisabeach

lifeisabeach — Mon, 12 May 2008 03:30:31 +0100

yeah i know what you mean by it makes it worse because then you start to feel guilty about feeling bad for yourself. i’ve been there. i still go through that sometimes.

the truth is you really need to rise above this both mentally and physically. i’m not saying to get a big head and be prideful but you need to see the beauty and greatness in the world around you.

Reply from Puck You

Puck You — Mon, 12 May 2008 03:30:25 +0100

But they would freak out if I told them I was suicidal

Reply from Puck You

Puck You — Mon, 12 May 2008 03:30:07 +0100

In some respects

Reply from Puck You

Puck You — Mon, 12 May 2008 03:29:51 +0100

I can’t

Reply from Hohenheim of Light

Hohenheim of Light — Mon, 12 May 2008 03:29:48 +0100

[quote The_Alice]I didn’t see that question. I’m sorry. Yes, I have my parents.[/quote]

Are they supportive?

Reply from ill-wil

ill-wil — Mon, 12 May 2008 03:29:30 +0100

Call them.

Reply from Puck You

Puck You — Mon, 12 May 2008 03:29:13 +0100

I didn’t see that question. I’m sorry. Yes, I have my parents.

Reply from ill-wil

ill-wil — Mon, 12 May 2008 03:28:28 +0100

Sharing problems often helps. Don’t most people feel grateful they have legs after seeing another without? Be thankfull for what you do have. I did ask if you had family near.

Reply from Puck You

Puck You — Mon, 12 May 2008 03:27:15 +0100

But I already know that my life could be worse and often times it just makes me more depressed. As my counselor says “some things work for some people while other things work for other people.”

Reply from lifeisabeach

lifeisabeach — Mon, 12 May 2008 03:25:50 +0100

that is partially true. there are many things that can help towards not being suicidal thats only one of them. it could be worse doesnt necessarily help by just saying it. being greatful for the fact that it isnt worse than others is just a good thing to do.

Reply from Puck You

Puck You — Mon, 12 May 2008 03:25:39 +0100

[quote ill-wil]and neither is this place[/quote]

So am I. But you might feel differently if you create your own post.

Reply from Hohenheim of Light

Hohenheim of Light — Mon, 12 May 2008 03:25:09 +0100

[quote ill-wil]and neither is this place[/quote]

Sorry you feel that way.

But I think it is.

Reply from Puck You

Puck You — Mon, 12 May 2008 03:24:47 +0100

[quote Commander Ikari]Pointing to someone else and saying it could be worse is not helpful.[/quote]

Thank you! Finally!

Reply from ill-wil

ill-wil — Mon, 12 May 2008 03:24:38 +0100

and neither is this place

Reply from Hohenheim of Light

Hohenheim of Light — Mon, 12 May 2008 03:24:07 +0100

Pointing to someone else and saying it could be worse is not helpful.

Reply from Puck You

Puck You — Mon, 12 May 2008 03:23:27 +0100

Dude! You don’t know what kinda life I am living!

Reply from ill-wil

ill-wil — Mon, 12 May 2008 03:22:59 +0100

Your life could be worse…that’s the point.

Reply from Puck You

Puck You — Mon, 12 May 2008 03:21:48 +0100

Oh for a while he took over the post and it became about his depressing life

Reply from Hohenheim of Light

Hohenheim of Light — Mon, 12 May 2008 03:20:45 +0100

[quote ill-wil]Try finding a job with a criminal record; just wrong places at wrong times(not a perv/violent person) with guilt by association really. I’ve got a degree, years of managing a business. An example: got through an interview and invited to train. I was honest and noted the convictions on the apps, so I was encouraged at first. On the exit interview, I thanked them for giving me a chance. Reply was what do you mean. When I told him directly(even though it was clear on the app), he apologized saying that he didn’t see that and there was no chance at all.

I’ve had to deal with this since I was 17, but there’s just no such thing as a second chance. I started my business 15 years ago, as it was clear I could never work in my major field. Hell, I can’t even get a fricken job as a janitor. I made a good life for my children, despite this, as customers rarely do background checks on company owners and are more concerned with the quality of work. I bust my *** to provide for my wife and kids. My life insurance recently became irrevocable, so it’s really looking like the only way I can secure our home and give them what they need. Money has never been important to me, but when it’s not there….[/quote]

huh?

Reply from ill-wil

ill-wil — Mon, 12 May 2008 03:18:57 +0100

Try finding a job with a criminal record; just wrong places at wrong times(not a perv/violent person) with guilt by association really. I’ve got a degree, years of managing a business. An example: got through an interview and invited to train. I was honest and noted the convictions on the apps, so I was encouraged at first. On the exit interview, I thanked them for giving me a chance. Reply was what do you mean. When I told him directly(even though it was clear on the app), he apologized saying that he didn’t see that and there was no chance at all.

The post was edited by Puck You

Puck You — Mon, 12 May 2008 03:18:32 +0100

Reply from Puck You

Puck You — Mon, 12 May 2008 03:13:28 +0100

[quote Felicity-{KIMKRISS}]Alice,I wont argue,but i very much disagree with what you said.[/quote]

You have a right to disagree.

Reply from MamaBear {Felicity}

MamaBear {Felicity} — Mon, 12 May 2008 03:12:44 +0100

Alice,I wont argue,but i very much disagree with what you said.

Reply from Puck You

Puck You — Mon, 12 May 2008 03:11:03 +0100

[quote lifeisabeach]i know how that feels being over-sensitive and everything. i get like that alot. you need to remember that you need to rise above that no matter how you feel. try not to live off of feelings. live off of decisions to improve yourself to your best standard.[/quote]

Yea, I know.

Reply from Hohenheim of Light

Hohenheim of Light — Mon, 12 May 2008 03:10:35 +0100

: ) glad to help

Reply from lifeisabeach

lifeisabeach — Mon, 12 May 2008 03:10:26 +0100

i know how that feels being over-sensitive and everything. i get like that alot. you need to remember that you need to rise above that no matter how you feel. try not to live off of feelings. live off of decisions to improve yourself to your best standard.

Reply from Puck You

Puck You — Mon, 12 May 2008 03:09:42 +0100

[quote Commander Ikari][quote The_Alice]It’s a chemical imbalance but bi-polars are easily depressed by something as little as someone telling them that they don’t like their shirt.[/quote]In that case, I really like your shirt.Feeling a little better?[/quote]

lol. Thanks! laughter always helps.

Reply from Hohenheim of Light

Hohenheim of Light — Mon, 12 May 2008 03:09:03 +0100

[quote The_Alice]It’s a chemical imbalance but bi-polars are easily depressed by something as little as someone telling them that they don’t like their shirt.[/quote]

In that case, I really like your shirt.

Feeling a little better?

Reply from Puck You

Puck You — Mon, 12 May 2008 03:08:25 +0100

It’s a chemical imbalance but bi-polars are easily depressed by something as little as someone telling them that they don’t like their shirt.

Reply from lifeisabeach

lifeisabeach — Mon, 12 May 2008 03:07:37 +0100

i’m here! read my last post about suicide. its a very true story. plus if you’re bi-polar you should see a doctor.

Reply from MamaBear {Felicity}

MamaBear {Felicity} — Mon, 12 May 2008 03:07:21 +0100

Only from my experience,its a chemical imbalance not triggered by anything.

Reply from Puck You

Puck You — Mon, 12 May 2008 03:06:22 +0100

I just need someone to talk to.

Reply from Mas1st

Mas1st — Mon, 12 May 2008 03:05:59 +0100

So Alice what can we do ? Do you want to talk or what ? What’s going to get this to pass - because you know it will so what’s to be done? C’mon get it out.

Reply from lifeisabeach

lifeisabeach — Mon, 12 May 2008 03:05:56 +0100

read my last post about suicide.

Reply from Puck You

Puck You — Mon, 12 May 2008 03:03:51 +0100

I dunno. I’m bi-polar so I have major mood swings anything could trigger it.

Reply from MamaBear {Felicity}

MamaBear {Felicity} — Mon, 12 May 2008 03:03:46 +0100

Oh,Honey, You sounded like you were doing so good.Anything happen? or is it an ongoing thing? Ups and downs/sounds like your bi-polar,sorry I cant remember all your labels right now.lol.If so, you need a change in meds asap

Reply from Mas1st

Mas1st — Mon, 12 May 2008 03:02:51 +0100

Hey Alice - what happened? last time we spoke we were choosing hockey shirts - what triggered this off?

Reply from ba-tampt

ba-tampt — Mon, 12 May 2008 03:01:10 +0100

You can’t just sit around feeling sorry for yourself saying that the world would be better off without you because if you kill yourself now in twenty years no one is going to care and no one is going to remember you, that’s just bottom line. You have to accept that you are in a ****** situation and then change it. But you have to want to change, I shouldn’t have to convince you to pull yourself up from the rut you are in if you aren’t going to be willing to do it but I’m trying because I know suicide is the wrong decision. I feel pretty worthless now too to be completely honest but I’m not going to give up and I hope you won’t either. Live the life you want to lead, change everything that you don’t like because nothing can hurt you unless you let it. I know that must sound cliche but what I really want to hear right now is that everything will work out for me so I hope that maybe thats what you want to hear too; one day you’ll wake up and it won’t hurt anymore and you won’t feel hopeless or helpless. For now just watch some good movies or do something you enjoy, personally I really like the film French Kiss, it always makes me feel better. I wish you the best of luck with your life and I know things will get better for you someday so stick it out, its the best thing you can do.

Reply from Concerne

Concerne — Mon, 12 May 2008 02:59:37 +0100

Ill Will, what do you mean there isn’t anyplace for someone with your past?

Reply from ill-wil

ill-wil — Mon, 12 May 2008 02:58:09 +0100

Seems like each day just gets a little tougher. Now that my business has dissappeared, I started looking for work, but there just isn’t anyplace for someone with my past. I feel worthless when I can’t provide for my family. Do you have family near?

Reply from Concerne

Concerne — Mon, 12 May 2008 02:57:09 +0100

Depression is the worst thing to go through. Trust me, I know. It’s said in fact that a survey between patients with Cancer that have also battled depression in their lives would take the cancer any day. There is nothing worse than wanting to just curl up in a ball, and lay in bed to die…
Depression makes you feel awful all around, with everything. Rather than Physical pain which comes from ONE part of the body. Depression can effect not only your mental well being but can make you physically ill too. So I feel for you.
Alice, why not just lay in bed and turn some music on. Perhaps you can listen to a radio show or something to try to make you sleep. This way, you can sleep until tomorrow when you can just “vent” to someone.
Do you have friends and neighbors that you can talk to? not even about your thoughts of suicide per say, but just to talk about what’s going on in life?
Best,
Concerned

Reply from Puck You

Puck You — Mon, 12 May 2008 02:55:56 +0100

*hopeless

Reply from Puck You

Puck You — Mon, 12 May 2008 02:55:07 +0100

eless and helpless and I just can’t shake either one of them

Reply from ill-wil

ill-wil — Mon, 12 May 2008 02:53:40 +0100

I feel the same way. Such a hopeless feeling that I just can’t shake. I love my children and my family, which is the only thing that keeps me going.

Reply from Puck You

Puck You — Mon, 12 May 2008 02:53:14 +0100

Thanks. It just doesn’t feel like it.

15 users were invited to read this post by Puck You

Puck You — Mon, 12 May 2008 02:52:26 +0100

Reply from Hohenheim of Light

Hohenheim of Light — Mon, 12 May 2008 02:52:25 +0100

[quote The_Alice]I just feel like the world would be betteroff without me.[/quote]

No it would not, it would be a net loss for the world!

Reply from ba-tampt

ba-tampt — Mon, 12 May 2008 02:51:14 +0100

Look, I never said it would be easy.

Reply from Puck You

Puck You — Mon, 12 May 2008 02:50:43 +0100

and I guess I am right

Reply from Puck You

Puck You — Mon, 12 May 2008 02:48:30 +0100

I just feel like the world would be betteroff without me.

Reply from Puck You

Puck You — Mon, 12 May 2008 02:47:21 +0100

[quote ba-tampt]Then make them go away, they are your thoughts. You are stronger then you think, always remember that.[/quote]

Easier said than done!

Reply from Puck You

Puck You — Mon, 12 May 2008 02:47:03 +0100

[quote miss lizzie]i have these feelings too…just talk 2 someone about what your thinking it really does help i promise…[/quote]

That’s what I am doing here

Reply from Puck You

Puck You — Mon, 12 May 2008 02:46:34 +0100

Easier said than done!

Reply from miss lizzie

miss lizzie — Mon, 12 May 2008 02:46:33 +0100

i have these feelings too…just talk 2 someone about what your thinking it really does help i promise…

Reply from ba-tampt

ba-tampt — Mon, 12 May 2008 02:45:31 +0100

Then make them go away, they are your thoughts. You are stronger then you think, always remember that.