[Help] EVERYONE would be better off without me Updates to this post /post/166447-everyone-would-be-better-off-withou Mon, 15 Mar 2010 11:16:22 +0100 Reply from Family /post/166447-everyone-would-be-better-off-withou#reply-4383559 Hi Nikki,

I just saw your posting (new member)…
and wanted to say I CARE! I won’t advise you as to what to do. Perhaps I can offer a few kind words, though…
Our family is REALLY stretched financially. There is a lot of stress, too! What binds us together and helps us to endure the hard times is our faith. I can tell you that I know it is easy to get mad at our spouse or children and yell sometimes. It is usually difficult to swallow pride, and make amends afterward, but very rewarding…
Again, I don’t know your exact set of circumstances, but I do care, and would like to pray for you and your family. Best wishes, Nikki…

]]> Family Wed, 22 Oct 2008 02:43:37 +0100 Reply from irishtweety /post/166447-everyone-would-be-better-off-withou#reply-3802188 hello??? You still there?

]]> irishtweety Sun, 01 Jun 2008 23:20:16 +0100 Reply from irishtweety /post/166447-everyone-would-be-better-off-withou#reply-3802138 Hey - look; I just broke up with my ex who was on occasion physically abusive to me, I’ve been to a counsellor (quite unusal still in Ireland) and she helped me realise that my ex just knocked my confidence sooooooooooooo..oooooooo…….oooooo (you get the idea) much that I thought I was crazy & the one in the wrong…

It sounds like you are probably in a similar place i.e. feeling like you are worthless & everything is your fault but you are NOT THE ONE IN THE WRONG.. Really, you’re not… .

Take your kids & leave him; it will be horrendously hard at first but you (and your kids) will look back on it as the best move you ever made…

Take you AND your kids away from him….

]]> irishtweety Sun, 01 Jun 2008 22:47:46 +0100 Reply from Anonymous /post/166447-everyone-would-be-better-off-withou#reply-3802125 im unable to care for anyone, im being honest, im unfit.

]]> Anonymous Sun, 01 Jun 2008 22:42:10 +0100 Reply from irishtweety /post/166447-everyone-would-be-better-off-withou#reply-3802114 Ok… I really don’t mean to sound mean but you are just being silly… Your kids are not better off without you being raised by someone who thinks it is acceptable in any way to be abusive to ppl; what kind of kids would someone like that raise??? Don’t leave your kids with that as an influence…

Ok, let’s try figure this out…
Are you close to your family or more importantly (please be honest) would they put you & the kids up for a few days if needs be?
Are you close to any friends or even a coworker etc & as above; would they put you up?
Where do you live, failing all else are there womens refuges or something similar in your country or city?

]]> irishtweety Sun, 01 Jun 2008 22:36:02 +0100 Reply from Anonymous /post/166447-everyone-would-be-better-off-withou#reply-3802104 i have no where to go but i dont care…just gonna drive til i find my way

]]> Anonymous Sun, 01 Jun 2008 22:34:16 +0100 Reply from Anonymous /post/166447-everyone-would-be-better-off-withou#reply-3802099 i want to leave him yes, but i dont know how, or where to start , or my poor kids, i scare them….so its better you see to just leave alone in the dark of night. there will finally be peace for my kids as i know he would never hurt them, he is a way better parent then i am.

]]> Anonymous Sun, 01 Jun 2008 22:32:45 +0100 Reply from irishtweety /post/166447-everyone-would-be-better-off-withou#reply-3802097 Basically leave him… I know ppl always say they have nowhere to go etc but do you have anywhere you could go?

]]> irishtweety Sun, 01 Jun 2008 22:32:23 +0100 Reply from irishtweety /post/166447-everyone-would-be-better-off-withou#reply-3802085 So your husband is sponging off you financially and is also preventing you from being with friends etc?? Have you been together long? Are things really that bad or is it a case of (and we’re all guilty of it) exaggerating it a little…..

Oh, wait a sec.. Your husband has been mentally & physically abusive to you??? Then at the risk of making it sound like everything is straightforward… Leave him…

You can’t have your kids see you in an abusive relationship and it is not in any way good for you…

Would you leave him?

]]> irishtweety Sun, 01 Jun 2008 22:28:49 +0100 Reply from Anonymous /post/166447-everyone-would-be-better-off-withou#reply-3802082 so if i keep them short , no need for approval eh?

]]> Anonymous Sun, 01 Jun 2008 22:27:46 +0100 Reply from Anonymous /post/166447-everyone-would-be-better-off-withou#reply-3802080 i have been mentally and physically abrused for so long i am now unstable because of it, and a terrible mother as a result .

]]> Anonymous Sun, 01 Jun 2008 22:27:04 +0100 Reply from Anonymous /post/166447-everyone-would-be-better-off-withou#reply-3802067 my husband has taken me dry, my money, my friends, my freedom and mostly my sanity

]]> Anonymous Sun, 01 Jun 2008 22:24:22 +0100 Reply from Anonymous /post/166447-everyone-would-be-better-off-withou#reply-3802062 ok i said that ,crap i cant even remember all i wrote…just another straw to break my back..i have no fight left, im beaten and broken.

]]> Anonymous Sun, 01 Jun 2008 22:23:26 +0100 Reply from irishtweety /post/166447-everyone-would-be-better-off-withou#reply-3802053 wanna retype the basic jist of it?? Not sure if my advice or whatever you call it was helpful - hope it was….

]]> irishtweety Sun, 01 Jun 2008 22:17:20 +0100 Reply from Anonymous /post/166447-everyone-would-be-better-off-withou#reply-3802050 and i didnt say one thing wrong

]]> Anonymous Sun, 01 Jun 2008 22:16:37 +0100 Reply from Anonymous /post/166447-everyone-would-be-better-off-withou#reply-3802047 so unfair it gonna take forever to get it approved

]]> Anonymous Sun, 01 Jun 2008 22:16:06 +0100 Reply from Anonymous /post/166447-everyone-would-be-better-off-withou#reply-3802043 i didnt even cuss why does it have to be approved?

]]> Anonymous Sun, 01 Jun 2008 22:15:01 +0100 Reply from Anonymous /post/166447-everyone-would-be-better-off-withou#reply-3802037 my husband has suck me dry, taken all my friends, money and mostly my sanity..im broken beyond the point of fixing myself . he makes my blood boil like no one else in the world. i cant stand looking at him. after many yrs of being mentally and physically abused, im the unstable one now. Im a terrible mother because of it. they would all be better off if im gone.

]]> Anonymous Sun, 01 Jun 2008 22:12:54 +0100 Reply from irishtweety /post/166447-everyone-would-be-better-off-withou#reply-3801989 Ok, well then what is wrong that you are shouting at your husband?? Is it something that you and he can fix/resolve?

Like Joey above my parents always argued when I was a child and then finally seperated when I was 22… My only wish was that they had seperated sooner because they genuinely were not suited.. .They are both with other ppl now & I love seeing them happy although I must say even at the ripe old age of 22 it took a lot out of me for them to seperate so I am not suggesting you do that… What I am suggesting is that you try to figure out (1) what are the problems, (2) can these problems be fixed and (3) do you and your hubbie want to fix things or make things beter…

Running away is absolutely not the answer… For your own sake and for the sake of your little kids…

]]> irishtweety Sun, 01 Jun 2008 21:59:48 +0100 Reply from Anonymous /post/166447-everyone-would-be-better-off-withou#reply-3801974 thanks joey

]]> Anonymous Sun, 01 Jun 2008 21:57:08 +0100 Reply from soxfan0 /post/166447-everyone-would-be-better-off-withou#reply-3801963 your*

]]> soxfan0 Sun, 01 Jun 2008 21:54:41 +0100 Reply from soxfan0 /post/166447-everyone-would-be-better-off-withou#reply-3801961 problems never get fixed by deserting them, never. my parents fight all the time. ever since i can remember they have never gotten along. Although all the time they have said that they are going to leave, they never do because they know that is not going to help me and my sibilings. they both try to make things work, even though things havent gotten better, its just the idea that they are trying makes the difference to me. i dont know how you’re kids feel but that is how i feel about my parents. if all else, that is how i know my parents care for me. I dont know you situation but this is what ive experienced in my life. i hope that helps.

- Joey

]]> soxfan0 Sun, 01 Jun 2008 21:53:37 +0100 Reply from Anonymous /post/166447-everyone-would-be-better-off-withou#reply-3801938 i dont shout at them ..its at my husband but they unfortunatly see it all, they are young both under 7

]]> Anonymous Sun, 01 Jun 2008 21:45:54 +0100 Reply from irishtweety /post/166447-everyone-would-be-better-off-withou#reply-3801931 But is that just ’cause you are very stressed or overworked? Do you know what makes you shout at them???
What ages are they?

]]> irishtweety Sun, 01 Jun 2008 21:44:00 +0100 Reply from Anonymous /post/166447-everyone-would-be-better-off-withou#reply-3801929 by yelling and screaming and throwing things, this crazy monster comes out

]]> Anonymous Sun, 01 Jun 2008 21:42:58 +0100 Reply from irishtweety /post/166447-everyone-would-be-better-off-withou#reply-3801921 I hate to ask the same question again but what is wrong; what type of thing?
How do you scare your kids?

]]> irishtweety Sun, 01 Jun 2008 21:41:25 +0100 Reply from Anonymous /post/166447-everyone-would-be-better-off-withou#reply-3801918 everything, im not the same person i use to be. I scare my kids, i hate myself, my life …i just need to go away and get better before i can be of any use to anyone.

]]> Anonymous Sun, 01 Jun 2008 21:40:09 +0100 Reply from irishtweety /post/166447-everyone-would-be-better-off-withou#reply-3801910 Hi… What is wrong at home that you want to run away??

]]> irishtweety Sun, 01 Jun 2008 21:37:59 +0100