[Help] Why I'm Messed Up, or, An Exercise in Self Control Updates to this post /post/257877-why-im-messed-up-or-an-exe Sat, 05 Dec 2009 06:03:30 +0100 Reply from greengiant270 /post/257877-why-im-messed-up-or-an-exe#reply-4888716 Yeah, just remember that things are never so bad that they won’t get better. Just hang in there and hopefully everything will work out in the end. BTW, I just stumbled onto this site maybe half and hour ago because I was feeling super depressed about my issues. Just talking a little to random people has already made me feel a little better. I’m sure I’ll be back on here if you ever just need someone to listen.

]]> greengiant270 Sat, 21 Mar 2009 04:18:41 +0100 Reply from Anonymous /post/257877-why-im-messed-up-or-an-exe#reply-4888703 I hate my step mom. She actually tried to convince my father that I wasn’t his kid, for years on end!

My step-children lived with me. The mother kept lying to them, and using them. She hated them being in therapy too. She was way too paranoid. I hated always helping them, and then having them take out all of their anger (for their mom) out on me.

My mom doesn’t like her step-children either.

In my opinion, step in front of anything is a barrier. It usually ends relationships.

Jsut talking here can really help. People can’t really judge you that much, unless you tell them WAYYYYY dumb things. It’s rare. People here, for the most part, seem to have much more compassion and understanding.

I have to get to bed. Write more.Maybe we’ll taklk again tomorrow. My eyes are closed. I am too tired to write anymore. goodnight. please keep talking. *hugs*

]]> Anonymous Sat, 21 Mar 2009 04:12:44 +0100 Reply from greengiant270 /post/257877-why-im-messed-up-or-an-exe#reply-4888680 Well, I wish you all the luck in the world. If it comes down it maybe try standing up to them and asking “do you want me to be happy or are you just worried about the negative impact the truth might have on you?”

]]> greengiant270 Sat, 21 Mar 2009 04:01:28 +0100 Reply from bobbleheadfoo /post/257877-why-im-messed-up-or-an-exe#reply-4888673 See, church…ehh…really, really not religious. Not a rampantly anti-religious atheist, but a lot of the advice I’ve gotten in religious situations has made me cringe more than help me. As for other free counseling options, I’ve really never heard much about those. I’ve got absolutely crazy counselors at my school (who aren’t even really confidential, apparently), but I’ll have to look into other options.

]]> bobbleheadfoo Sat, 21 Mar 2009 03:57:25 +0100 Reply from bobbleheadfoo /post/257877-why-im-messed-up-or-an-exe#reply-4888668 Ha, well it’s not even really my dad. It’s my step mom, who’s seriously messed up. I don’t even know. I really, just, don’t get what goes on in either of those peoples heads.

They thought that therapy was having a negative effect on me because my therapist made me realize how messed up they were, and raised my confidence and gave me ways to talk back to them when they tried to manipulate me. Their whole thing is that my mom is poisoning me and they need to reverse her parenting and add their own. So when I started having defenses against that and their weirdness…wuh-oh. Not good.

]]> bobbleheadfoo Sat, 21 Mar 2009 03:54:12 +0100 Reply from greengiant270 /post/257877-why-im-messed-up-or-an-exe#reply-4888661 That does sound like quite a sticky situaiton. When money is involved, people always tend to get over emotional. Not sure if its an option for you, but I’m sure there are many other options for counseling that shouldn’t cost anything. Some churches offer free counseling to anyone who is willing to show up. Maybe check into that. I can’t pretend to know what you’re going through because everyones issues are different in there own way. However, I have suffered with depression for a long time, so I do know that sometimes is seems like there is no way out. Just know that there is always a way out no matter how bad things get. Try to find some free counseling in your area.

]]> greengiant270 Sat, 21 Mar 2009 03:52:23 +0100 Reply from Anonymous /post/257877-why-im-messed-up-or-an-exe#reply-4888654 Is he afraid that you are talking about him? he must be really insecure. What about free therapy? Is there any near where you live? or online? Sometimes, just talking to random people, like on here, helps more than your realise. I think people can have a way of letting us know that what we are feeling is normal. It’s nice, once in a blue moon, to get some sympathy too. Other times, all we need is a sounding board to bounce ideas off of.

What do you think? Keep writing here. I don’t understand why he would have an issue with you wanting/needing/getting help. Wouldn’t most parents want the best for their kids? I know that I do.

]]> Anonymous Sat, 21 Mar 2009 03:50:21 +0100 Reply from bobbleheadfoo /post/257877-why-im-messed-up-or-an-exe#reply-4888627 He forces himself into being a big influence in my life. That’s a whole other complex dynamic, but basically he’s an a-hole. The problem is, to go back to therapy, I’d need his financial support (he is quite well off while my mom is not). And my mom would have to take all of his crap if/when he found out, because he hated that I went to therapy without telling him. Thought the therapist was having a negative effect on me.

]]> bobbleheadfoo Sat, 21 Mar 2009 03:40:16 +0100 Reply from greengiant270 /post/257877-why-im-messed-up-or-an-exe#reply-4888621 Your dad sounds like a big part of the problem. Did you ever talk about your issues with him when you were going to therapy? Also, how big of an influence is he on your life? If I were in your situation, I’d go start going back to therapy, because from what you’ve said it sounds like the best option for you. If you don’t think you father can handle it then don’t let him know. You have to think about what is best for you, not what other want for you.

]]> greengiant270 Sat, 21 Mar 2009 03:37:54 +0100