[Help] I don't know how to ask for help. Updates to this post /post/291269-i-dont-know-how-to-ask-for-h Sun, 29 Nov 2009 10:39:51 +0100 Reply from usurper /post/291269-i-dont-know-how-to-ask-for-h#reply-5112283 [quote Anonymous]It is easier to escape into work or television or helping someone else solve their problems than figure out my own issues.[/quote]

Ha ha I think we all know a little something about that.

Why do you put “cares” in quotation marks?

I think you need to start by jumping that pedestal you’re putting yourself on. Why shouldn’t you need help? Why is that shaming to you?

I dont know if your problem is that you can ask for help, you just dont know how to take the help you’re given.

I don’t know buddy - you have to try. You’re lazy because you’re depressed. Its a cycle and you have to break it if you want to change it.

]]> usurper Fri, 03 Jul 2009 23:39:43 +0100 Reply from Anonymous /post/291269-i-dont-know-how-to-ask-for-h#reply-5112268 I have confided in a friend who “cares”. She has had great suggestions, I just can not take the first step. I am too ashamed that I can not deal with the situation myself. I know I should not be ashamed and there are many resources. I am petrified to admit I have a problem face to face. I know I will not be judged, but I judge, it is human nature. Trusting someone else and the fear of what I will feel prevents me from moving forward.

For lack of better words I feel lazy. I don’t want to be faced with the work I know I need to put in to figure this out. It is easier to escape into work or television or helping someone else solve their problems than figure out my own issues.

]]> Anonymous Fri, 03 Jul 2009 23:32:13 +0100 Reply from usurper /post/291269-i-dont-know-how-to-ask-for-h#reply-5112248 Well what have you tried? Have you tried anything or is this your first attempt?

]]> usurper Fri, 03 Jul 2009 23:19:23 +0100 Reply from Anonymous /post/291269-i-dont-know-how-to-ask-for-h#reply-5112243 I suppose that maybe my problem, I don’t know how to connect to others and that is why I don’t know what the hell I am here for.

]]> Anonymous Fri, 03 Jul 2009 23:16:59 +0100 Reply from usurper /post/291269-i-dont-know-how-to-ask-for-h#reply-5112237 [quote khassel]I definitely have a lack of trust in others, and a fear of being vulnerable. I am afraid to let others in and have them question me. I am afraid of the help I will get because of those trust issues. How do I find the right person to confide in?[/quote]

If we aren’t connecting with other people - than what the hell are we here for?!

The right person to confide in is someone who has already shown to you that they care for you. Pick a handful of people and create a circle of trust. Confide in those people and work your way to trusting those who have shown they care for you.

]]> usurper Fri, 03 Jul 2009 23:13:46 +0100 Reply from kch /post/291269-i-dont-know-how-to-ask-for-h#reply-5112234 I definitely have a lack of trust in others, and a fear of being vulnerable. I am afraid to let others in and have them question me. I am afraid of the help I will get because of those trust issues. How do I find the right person to confide in?

]]> kch Fri, 03 Jul 2009 23:10:51 +0100 Reply from thebigbadhawk /post/291269-i-dont-know-how-to-ask-for-h#reply-5112138 fear can be very paralizing. it mostly due to lack of trust in other people or ultimantly God.

]]> thebigbadhawk Fri, 03 Jul 2009 22:11:14 +0100 Reply from thebigbadhawk /post/291269-i-dont-know-how-to-ask-for-h#reply-5112136 i’m the same way. not a psychologest though. i’m in really tight finatual situation right now because of a empoyeer embezzeled all the company funds and wont pay me what he owes me like $8000.00 I cant pay rent, my power has been shut off and all i can do is sit here in complete fear. i know i have to ask for help but i fear the responce i “might” get.

]]> thebigbadhawk Fri, 03 Jul 2009 22:08:47 +0100 Reply from littlenick /post/291269-i-dont-know-how-to-ask-for-h#reply-5112095 Deja Vu?

I have seen this post before with the exact same answers. Weird!!!!

I think he has come to terms with it, he just doesn’t know how to ask for help.

]]> littlenick Fri, 03 Jul 2009 21:41:47 +0100 Reply from usurper /post/291269-i-dont-know-how-to-ask-for-h#reply-5112092 Asking for help is a big pill to swallow for some people.

Just admit that you’re human and that yes, you do need help.

Have you been saying “I don’t need anyone” you whole life? Truth is - you do need other people, you do need help sometimes.

Just admit it to yourself. Sounds like you haven’t quite come to terms with it.

]]> usurper Fri, 03 Jul 2009 21:38:56 +0100 Reply from littlenick /post/291269-i-dont-know-how-to-ask-for-h#reply-5112083 You have a degree in psychology but you don’t know how to move on?

]]> littlenick Fri, 03 Jul 2009 21:34:33 +0100 Reply from Anonymous /post/291269-i-dont-know-how-to-ask-for-h#reply-5112075 “just do it”
go thru the motions and the right attitude will follow.

]]> Anonymous Fri, 03 Jul 2009 21:27:33 +0100