aloth's reply history at Help.com

My mother and I will both have to sell the house in a year or two, so my boyfriend
can buy our own place. My mother will have to downsize, buy a smaller place or rent an apartment. My godmother was right..couples and inlaws should never live together!

Thanks for the advice everyone. My boyfriend and I live in the basement of the house, but there is no door separating the basement (this is the layout of the house, its a 2 split level). My mom has helped me out incredibly over the past, so I thought it was my turn to give back. She wanted a better house than what she had before, but she couldn’t have done it without my help. My boyfiend’s finances isn’t the greatest to buy a house of our own, going in wth my mother seemed like a good idea a the time. I don’t think a year or two living at the house will be the end of the world for my boyfiend and I, we just have to be smart and use our time wisely there….to save for our downpayment for our own house. I live in Canada and the housing market is always booming..in a year or two we’ll definetly make some equity on the house…when we sell:)

My mom will be disappointed if the we sell the house in a year. Our intial plan was
to stay in the house for 5 years to build equity and then sell it. Our situation is
ruining our family relationship…I am 30 years old shouldn’t be living with my parents. This was my mother’s idea to make more money, but it’s breaking up our family.

Thanks for the advice everyone! I may take the big step and go see my doctor, I feel
very embarassed, but I really want to get better. I feel like I have a sickness and
it will never go away unless I do something now. I wish I never started taking laxatives, they definetly should not sold anywhere, only with a prescription. In highschool I just wanted to be thin and wanted a quick fix, now I’m paying for it terribly! Too all the young girls and women out there unsatisfied with their body,
just be healthy and don’t abuse yourselves! I’ve learned the hard way, beauty comes from within!

Please talk to someone, a friend, a family member. I went through depression too
in my early 20’s…remember its not just about you..you have family and friends around you that love you. You have your children that should mean the world to you!
You may need medical help..please see a doctor. You are young and a beautiful person..can can give so much to your children..don’t give up!

Thanks for all the great advice everyone! I like what “Times’gone mad” had to say.
My boyfriend and I do see a future together, this is just a big bump in our relationship. I’m sure every relationship goes through some kind of nasty bump. I believe this is something we can work on…he has found himself a better job and would like things financially secure for us. Finances is definetly an important part
of relationship that needs to be all layed out..its our future to a better life.

To: Wantmore
I just get by with the bills..my boyfriend pays me back after I have paid them.
Thanks for your advice..I have thought about getting some couselling together
about our finances. I try to go over the finances with my boyfriend, but most
of the time he’s not interested or becomes very defensive and walks out. We both have goals of buying a house together..but he has to realize we have to start saving and not buy things we can’t afford.

Yes..thats the way I was looking at it for the longest time..”what is yours is mine and vice versa”. I do support boyfriend, I’m supporting both of us financally now, he does contribute when he gets his paychecks. I did mention he is bad at handling money..what makes me upset is he buys things for himself we can not afford..that
money could go towards our bills and rent! He needs help with his finances and yes I have helped..I paid for most of it. It would just feel nice to be taken care of
emotionally and financially (at least a little) by a man that I love.

Oh, really? The situation I’m in, has happened to a few my friends, I’ve never
thought it would happen to me. It’s so hard..I do love him..I’m a very caring person and helpful towards my friends and family. I’m sorry to hear about
your cousins.