paranoiaman's profile at Help.com

User Involvement

Last 5 Posts Authored

• Did they just create a new nation state, or what? posted (4 months, 1 week) ago
  I keep seeing all you luvvly people who are from “an unknown location”. I’m fro…

• Anyone remember, ‘cos I cant… posted (4 months, 3 weeks) ago
  A story/novel (ok maybe just a weird half remembered dream/hallucinogen induced thang, but I hav…

• Read this. posted (8 months) ago
  Now. And do as I ask. I know that’s rude. A lot of you probably don’t like me much. I a…

• Alternative Type of Growth Lesson For Today: Censorship posted (8 months, 3 weeks) ago
  Ok, here’s how; Start a series of “advice giving” posts, one a day. you know, t…

• I Must Confess posted (8 months, 4 weeks) ago
  I have no fur. I am entirely bald. I have been depilated to within an inch of my life, as the lovel…

• All Claimed Posts »

paranoiaman's Top (5) Replies by other users' votes

• (4 votes) If 10% of the population is gay, what percentage is bi?
  

  About 2% less than the total of those who give a sh*t about labelling people.
  If you have sex with someone of the same gender it is gay. If you have sex with someone of the opposite gender it is not. If you have sex with both at the same time, it is a party. Enjoy.
  
  - written 8 months, 3 weeks ago – voted for by ScreaminglyWonderful, Ell♥, Nightowl, mou

• (3 votes) i dont remember my password from a year ago can u
  

  Shazam? Open Sesame? Mouse-Cat-ear? Password1? Antidisestablishmentarianism? 42? Something something oranges something? Flibbertygibbet?
  HTH
  
  - written 8 months, 4 weeks ago – voted for by milo, 'Bell, mou

• (2 votes) Hi…My name is Gavi and I am 57.I lost a brother
  

  You did not fail, nor your siblings. The failure is theirs, your parents. You cannot blame yourself for their actions and inaction. You must learn to cool the anger within you, or it will spill out as blame and tarnish all your relationships. You can get help with this; books, relaxation techniques, couselling, meditation. You must learn to let go. It is not within your power to change the lives your parents have chosen for themselves. While wanting to please other people is admirable, it can never be at the cost of your own happiness. You must take steps to get in touch with yourself, accept and understand your hurt and anger and learn to let it go and move on with your life. When the trouble is our parents, this is often very difficult, as we are programmed, in a way, to look to them for guidance, to trust them to show us how to behave appropriately, to show us how to love. When they, probably because of their own early life issues, are unable to do this, we must learn to be strong in and of ourselves. We must recognise their mistakes and vow not to repeat them. We must try to forgive them theirs. This does not mean that we have to kowtow to their every whim, for fear of offending them. When your actions, speech and thought are guided by a good heart, you have nothing to be guilty or ashamed of. You must build your own worth, your own identity and not allow yourself to remain trapped by their expectations and denegrating behaviour. Your life is your own to live, not theirs to experience vicariously. It is a very difficult thing to do, but you must find the strength to demonstrate a better way to them by your example. Find peace within yourself and others will be drawn to the compusure, tolerance and compassion you will display, when you face and learn to cool the flames of anger within yourself.
  
  - written 3 months, 3 weeks ago – voted for by Araz, erin

• (2 votes) I feel really bad about something that probably hardly matters, but it still hurts…
  

  Give your self confidence an extreme makeover. Men like confident women. If at your core you think of yourself as unworthy of attention and unattractive, this will show in your poise and mannerisms. Shake what your momma gave you, girl! You are fabulous just as you are. If some stoopid guy can’t see that, what the heck, there’s a world full of stoopid guys out there. Love yourself and others will too.
  
  - written 6 months, 2 weeks ago – voted for by , fengshuisweetheart

• (2 votes) Honestly, it’s no big deal.
  

  If they simply add the word “most” to their posts that should sort it out.
  eg. “Why do men MOST cheat?” “Is it typical for MOST males to ignore the problem, even without trying?”
  Problem solved.
  
  I mean, lets not kid. MOST of us are lying, conniving, sex-mad, self-centred, emotionally stunted momma’s boys. SOME of us might not be. Maybe.
  
  Personally, in the interest of equality, I don’t really mind what how the ladies choose to generalise us. After all this time of living in a male dominated, full of horsesh*t world, that derides, degrades and generalises women every single day, I can stand to take a little flak in return. Even if it doesn’t specifically apply.
  
  The thing about equality is that it is an ideal. Ideals are great. But incredibly impractical.
  
  - written 8 months ago – voted for by JesusMurphy

Last 5 Replies – All 715 replies »

• And here I was, thinking I didn’t need help.
  

  Is the problem that you are self injuring, or is the problem that you are concerned about others finding out? I know that sounds a little facetious, but really, which of those two things are you having a bigger “problem” with?
  Some people like to experiment with pain. Some people like to have designs branded onto their skin, kinda like tattooing, but, y’know with a more horrible smell. Some people like to have metal dangling from every available appendage. Are these problems?
  If you are causing injury for attention, then yes, that is a problem. The problem is you feel like you do not receive the attention that you crave. There are other, less painful ways to seek attention. If pain is your thing, as a way of testing your endurance, to get your juices flowing,just for the heck of it, who can say it’s wrong? Only you, Mou. Only you.
  We are just a big jumbled bag of behaviours which we like to call “me”. Some behaviours we pay particular attention to,fixate on, some we do not and they carry on, almost unnoticed, seemingly detatched from our own idea of who “me” is.
  We would all, at times, like our lives to be revolving around a significant event. Gosh forbid that we continue our days, til their end, in an endless cycle of TV, work and blah. Let the Earth rend asunder! Let blight sweep the land that I may become a post apocalyptic anti-hero! Let me be mutated in an unfortunate nuclear accident which tragically takes the lives of my parents and leaves me able to leap tall buildings, fly and flatten ballbearings between my fingertips! Let it be more than dinner and “goodnight, Mom”!Let just some f**king thing which seems to give my life some kind of f**king meaning happen. Just once. Anything. Please,Louise.
  
  Life has no meaning other than that which we attribute to it. It’s just life. We live, we die. Life is what you choose to do with it. What you chose, Mou, was to try and help those who needed advice, sympathy, just someone, anyone, to listen for once. And yes, if we are not careful, if we are not aware, we can find ourselves infected, almost, by sharing in the pain and misfortune of others. We find ourselves feeling low, casting an unfavourable eye over our own seemingly drab, uneventful existence. Anything, viewed in isolation, can seem pointless. Like saying any word, over and over, until it is just absurd noise. It’s only when we see how everything is connected that it makes any sense. You have made a difference, Mou. It’s just not always that easy to see from where you sit at your screen.
  
  You don’t have to cut, or prick or burn just to be someone, just to do something. You already are. You already do. You are Mou. You help.
  
  I like you, Mou. No one likes to see the people they like suffer in silence. Sometimes just telling someone something lets you see it yourself, from a whole different perspective.
  
  I am glad that you have returned, Magnificent Mou. I probably should have mentioned that first up. Social convention, an’ all.
  Feh!
  - written 3 months ago

• In memory of the 7/7/05 bombings.
  

  Indeed everyone counts. It simply seems that some count more than others. Remembering is not enough. We must pledge to make it stop. We will never make it stop by ratcheting up racial tension, mistrust and fear. We will never make it stop by creating the very conditions which allow others to rail against our actions and vow to bring their fight to our doorsteps also. To fight violent action with violent action produces only death and greater suffering and eternal conflict.
  And just to clear it up, I am a person. A human being. All people are my people. When we focus on our differences we foment the conditions for division and conflict. We all bleed the same colour.
  The dead are beyond our help. Use whatever drive their senseless loss gives you to fight for the living who’s voices go ignored and unheard. They are the ones who need our help. We cannot undo the past. We can only hope to learn from it and avoid making the same mistakes in the present.
  - written 3 months ago

• In memory of the 7/7/05 bombings.
  

  I remember the event. I remember the senseless death. I remember it described as “Britain’s 9/11″ as if this was the worst horror man could imagine. I remember thinking it strange that we are encouraged to “never forget” those from these shores who lost their lives, innocent bystanders who never asked for this. It is strange because we are actively discouraged from feeling any empathy towards the thousands upon thousands who have lost their lives in Iraq and Afghanistan, people who, like those who died in London, never asked for the violence and terror that is being wrought upon them, still.
  We must “never forget” that “terrorists” could strike at anytime, anywhere. We must never think that for the peoples of the war ravaged Iraq and Afghanistan, this is not just a veiled threat, a back of the mind anxiety whilst shopping or commuting, this is the reality of their daily lives, as we “combat terror” with our “aerial bombardments” and “police actions” and “unfortunate collateral damage”
  
  Fear is not just what “terrorists” want. Its what draconian governments NEED. Fear is what stops you from asking those awkward questions about human rights and private defense contractors and government complicity and massive private sector profits and defence spending and the senseless loss of hundreds of thousands of lives, at home and abroad. We are facing the new faceless bogeyman of the governments creation, move over Reds under the bed, now we have Islamoterror!
  The London bombings, like the events of September 11 before them, were an appalling, tragic, senseless waste of human life. We should never forget. We should never attribute those lives to have any greater value than the estimated one and a quarter million Iraqi lives lost since the illegal occupation began. Nameless, faceless, expendable. Almost forgotten already.
  God help us.
  - written 3 months ago

• Did they just create a new nation state, or what?
  

  You truly are “Lost” then =)
  - written 3 months, 1 week ago

• NOT EVEN MARRIED YET: JUST CAN’T GET ALONG
  

  Not even a date? Gosh! I love a forward Gal.
  - written 3 months, 1 week ago

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