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theresape has 9 Friends – Here are 9 of them
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theresape
Waltham, MA, US
theresape's Top (5) Replies by other users' votes
- (2 votes) I had a great job for 7 years then 9/11 came.
First, 9/11 has nothing to do with anything. That was just a play for sympathy. You got laid off. It happens.
Second, you do not owe your daughter a college education. She is 25 now, old enough to make this happen on her own if she wants it.
If your daughter wants an education, she should apply to colleges. If she is admitted to a good school, they will meet her financial needs. Some of the financial aid will probably come in the form of grants, some will come as loans, and some may come as work-duty.
If she doesn’t get financial aid, she can work full-time during the day and go to a community college at night.
Why do you assume that she can’s and shouldn’t work? We value most the things that we work hardest for. She is way too old to have an education handed to her off the sweat of your back.
Also, why are all these other people freeloading off you?
I am not at all surprised that you are stressed, but I don’t understand why you have accepted responsibility for supporting all these people, and I certainly don’t understand why you would expect a stranger to help you.
You need to learn to say “no.” $370 a week takehome pay is barely enough to support one person, let alone six. Tell the other five they need to start taking care of themselves.
Good luck.
- written 1 year, 3 months ago – voted for by hey...iknowyou, Nyxotic - (2 votes) My fiance just broke my heart,
Let him go. You can’t put yourself in the position of begging someone to want you. Even if he is confused about what he wants because of his mental illness, you can’t MAKE him be in love with you. Even if you do manage to drag him down the aisle kicking and screaming in protest, that’s no way to start a life together. If he broke your heart once, he will do it again.
When you find a person who is compatible with you, it will be easy and natural. Choose someone who makes you happy, not someone who breaks your heart. You are very young—gain some more experience dealing with people, start your nursing career, and the right sort of love will come your way.
Good luck, my dear.
- written 1 year, 3 months ago – voted for by OliveOil, logout - (2 votes) Is this a bad idea?
It’s NOT a bad idea to try living on your own and seeing how you like it.
It IS a bad idea to use this typical teenage parent-trashing stuff as an excuse to move in with your boyfriend.
You are too young and too unshaped at this point to rush into such a relationship.
Get your education first, establish your career, see what life offers you, and look forward to playing house with some horny guy LATER, when you are further along in your development.
Frankly, your parents’ expectations sound very reasonable to me. They provide you room, board, love, and a support network, and in exchange they expect you to be reasonably thoughtful (e.g., not keeping the whole household up all night long) and to perform reasonable household duties (e.g., keeping an eye on your brother and sister in the morning).
But If you really need to leave your parents’ home, try going it alone–or with a woman friend who won’t have all sorts of OTHER pressures to add to your life.
Honestly, you’ve got PLENTY of time to be a grownup—and not nearly enough time to live as a young girl in a family with two loving parents who are going to be dead before you know it. Why not relax and enjoy these luxuries while you have them?
- written 1 year, 4 months ago – voted for by Sans, Fizz - (2 votes) What do you do when people hate you for who you are ?
Think about that: Is it really about who you are, or is it about what you do?
You can’t change who you are. You can change what you do.
In other words, if people hate you because you are prettier than them, or smarter, or less conservative, or more optimistic, or more playful, there’s probably not a darn thing you can do about that. So ignore the s.o.b.s and find other people to care about.
On the other hand, if people hate you because you’re always dropping snide one-liners on them, or putting them down, or acting like god’s gift to the trailer park, THAT you can change, and might want to consider changing.
One is who you are; the other is what you do. Capiche?
- written 1 year, 5 months ago – voted for by cattail, ~Shie~ - (2 votes) Okay, so there is this girl in my class and nobody likes her.
Ok, so you’re the only ones in the school who are nice to her and you think you can (in the words of an above responder) “just gradually dump her without hurting her feelings”?
Let me clue you in: You can’t. I can guarantee that when the only people in the school who are nice to her “gradually dump” her, her feelings WILL be hurt.
Why don’t you try REALLY being nice to her–that is, letting her hang out with you a little bit and then NOT talking about her behind her back? If there is something overtly wrong with something she is doing, then gently take her aside and tell her, one-on-one. Give her some friendly advice, but don’t throw her to the wolves.
What does it cost you, anyway, to be nice to someone who’s slightly different? Can’t you put yourself in her shoes and think about what it must feel like to be the designated reject of the school?
You know what it sounds like to me? It sounds like all your friends are kind enough to WANT to be nice to her, but too insecure about it NOT to make fun of her when she turns her back. No one has the guts to just be nice and mean it.
I think YOU should step forward and be the brave one. The next time they start ragging on her, say something like, “Oh, give her a break. She’s a little awkward, but she’s not evil. Let’s be nice to her.” Demonstrate some CHARACTER, girl.
Have some charity, for heaven’s sake. Be kind to other people who are not as fortunate as you are. You don’t have to choose her as you maid of honor or hitch-hike across Europe with her after graduation. Just give her some people to talk to and someone to eat lunch with. Maybe when people stop treating her like an outcast she’ll get relaxed enough to be LESS awkward and strange.
- written 1 year, 6 months ago – voted for by Queen of Lost Vampyr, Florimouse