Emilie T's reply history at Help.com

there are some older people who use this site………..

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Wow.. I don’t know if we havea n EA fellowship around here.. but I’m going to AA in a couple of hours time.. I’m going everyday right now.. because I really am powerless otherwise…[/quote]

EA works for me…… I will open my e.mail to you and if you want….send me your address and I’ll post you some books.

x
Keep on keeping on! :)

and before horse…I ran.

erratically and irregularly. I put my ipod and bouncy trainers on and ran……!!

Until I ran off or ran out the emotion…..

Depression or elation…it brought me back to the centre.

Physical solutions to metaphysical problems…….

You are not bi-polar.

:) I don’t have a work ethic either…(though I’m working on it)…!

I went to something called Emotions anonymous..it really helped.

‘I came to believe I was powerless over my emotions and my life had become unmanageable’

Horse riding is symbolic……..I have to be safe, have the reins before we (horse and I) can fly……..

There isn’t one….

Suicide always causes pain.

I had a realisation this week that without adventure I become self destructive.

I ride my horse through the forest at dusk……
It lifts me to a place where I am most alive.

Wow…I though mine was bad….!!

What you have to remember is that shew will soon be a bitter and angry old lady and your boyf is a man and he is obviously working really hard to dispell her negative influence on him.

if you can, try to rise above this - none of it is true, and anyway it is not her business. Humour her.

your boyfriend really needs to let her get on and spend irresponsibly and ignore her habits that are bad. Stop bailing her out. He’s not going to fix her now……no one is.

OMG…..This is like reading my own words about me and my sister!!

We did not speak for a whole year….there was so much resentment between us.

We are good now, and love each other.

I think something changed…we became friends again. I always felt inadequate around her. The time apart i developed my self esteem and came to realise that we are two different people from different moulds. She wants me in her life, an I want her in mine.

I don’t know what to say but somewhere, you are right, there has to be forgiveness and understanding. It is a choice.

I BET - weould put money on her feeling resentful towards you….. Sibling relationships are complex… x I hope you find a way through because it will be worth it.

One of the greatest realisations for us was our parents are the older generation now and all that hurt was historiacal…

evey time his is mushy do something repulsive…you have to ‘train’ him to stop…!! Men do not understand that they need to be men…romance is good if it is not ‘wet’!

Let lots of daylight in…

Look out of the window……

set yourself some goals….

i.e in ‘2 weeks I will go swimming.’

And however **** you feel at that point…DO IT….go to a pool (or whatever) somewhere you don’t know anyone if it helps.

Get your boyfriend to take you for tea somewhere in three weeks….

I know it souns patronising but you have to make a recovery plan and stick to it, at the same time as being very very kind to yourself o.k?

the medication can help, but its trhe new thinking and behaviour habits that get us better inthe end.

(p.s I have sat at my computor since 10am and not eaten a thing……so am a total hypocrite)

I have to constantly monitor myself so I don’t get depressed.

It’s a fundamental neglect of self that comes from depression.

It is also depression that comes from a fundamental neglect of self.

I know it’s not that simple but whatever has cause your long term depression is deep rooted and will take time to repair and find strategies to manage…. there is no quick fix.

Please be nice to yourself o.k… :) let your boyfriend support you. don’t worry too much about the impact on him at the moment…If all he sees you eating,and watching crap T.V for a bit..it’ll be o.k. Life isn’t perfect and relationships mean that we adversly effect our loved ones now and again..

This is life and it makes us who we are….

TAKE CARE xx

Awwww….bless you ..I want to give you a massive hug.

Your poor body and synapses must be in a real spin with all those different tablets rushing around..

O.K…I am going to be really tough on you now………

You MUST eat!!

I have had severe depression. Various medications and stuff but am now, recovering…..

You must eat… Before you do anything else…EAT.

Force yourself to eat 3 times a day, good nutricius food. Do nothing else yet. don’t worry about going out. Just EAT even if every part of you wants to reject food.

O.K?

Now. Sit with your pyjamas on and a pillow and do not much else…except EAT!!

You also need to tell yourself that this illness is NOT who you are however small at the moment, find a little place within yourself that is o.k..cos there is one…and remember it.

you are ill.. you need to trat yourself like you would any ill person…i.e be kind, gentle and caring.

Those tears will stop.

Your boyfriend loves you … however frustrated he may be! He will be o.k with this sofa eating self caring business for a week or so if it gets you on the mend.

oh..it’s about someone who can go into peoples minds :)
And walk about..!

have you read ‘The end of Mr Y? Scarlett thomas?

also if you want to make a lifestyle of singing . dancing and acting you have to go out there and actually get involved in stuff…you will find that there are other people who might be nervous too, but you can pretty much guarentee that you will meet a few friends. x

If you go to college you can join the societies and clubs for singing / dancing and acting…you will meet other guys for whom singing, dancing and acting are part of normal every day life for them. If you don’t feel keen on studying at college, just know that by going your world will open up and you’ll meet new people with similar interests.
Your family don’t have to know about that until you are comfortable….which after a couple of years at college, you might be!!

Good luck!