Desert Sand's shoutbox - Help.com

I am about to write you something.

Hello, welcome.

Hello, welcome.

Hello Farah,

I know it’s been a long time, but do you remember me?

I’m sorry I didn’t get back to you earlier, I got really occupied with work and things have been quite hectic in daily life. Things still are, and I am not sure I should really be here, but I’m kinda having a little crisis of my own and just doing alot of soul searching and hoping to get some answers from God. I suppose it made me think about this place, but I don’t think I would find what I am looking for here.

I hope you are doing well and feeling better now about the recent loss of loved ones, insha’Allah things have gotten better, and if there is anything I can do for you, just let me know.

Take care for now, I hope you are still active. Salaam.

Junaid

Hey Farah, it’s been a long time since I spoke to you. I hope everything is ok :)

hi … did you meet your famous author?

Hey Farah!

I’m doing well… stressed and trying to prep for my trip to Israel.. I leave next week! I’m so excited. It’s a group trip with my peers age 22-26… fun fun fun!

How have you been? I was gone for some time.. I was in another state visiting family so I wasn’t on here much, still haven’t been as much as i used to, but I try. How come you haven’t been on here so much? I’ve been wondering how you were hehe…

Take care!

Just saying hello!
Have a nice one today :)

we did stand up for her.. we let her know how sorry we were.. how things got out of control and how we all reported the post to have it closed immediately.. so we all did understand and try to help her understand that we were all hurt.. but i bet neither one of you knew that now did you?

and again… the comments were jokes… something that we all did together.. as a group to each other… yes.. even diane… as for the medication.. please.. understand.. NO ONE KNEW why she got upset.. so again ASSUMPTIONS play a role in everything until you know the exact truth.. what are you not understanding about that??? im just mad because of the fact that diane joked around too.. and once the jokes were made about something that no one knew about… she got upset and even though it was hurtful to her.. it was hurtful to all of us who considered her a friend.. to know that she was upset.. it was not meant in any way to hurt her or be taken out of context.. it happened and its done.. the apologies were made and forgiveness was given.. so why keep the game playing? why make that post? why demean one person for something that we all have done… including diane… joking about each other on a day that we all felt good on… so.. what im not getting is… so for every one who jokes about another .. we should make posts about them… demeaning them?? if that was the case.. i would have a long list of posts on a lot of people.. im sorry that it happened.. as well as greeneyes.. but dang… it has to be at rest.. let it go… it cant be changed in what happened.. so leave it be.. and the one thing that you have to realize is.. im not sticking up for greeneyes.. im sticking up for what i know is the truth.. what i know because of what i read… if it were anyone of my friends.. and a person was demeaning one of my friends.. i would be there sticking up for them as well.. given the facts that i read what really went on..

for one… again assuming.. it was NOT my post… it was someone elses… so.. there we go.. you do not know the truth now do you.. as for diane being retarded.. no.. she is a very bright and educated woman.. no one disagrees with that.. not even greeneyes… i never said that.. infact.. this whole thing isnt about diane.. its about you and how you have taken the opportunity to throw everything out of the truth.. causing drama.. its about not knowing the truth about anything and assuming what you preserve to want to believe. and as you showed in your shout… stating my post.. obviously you do not know what is really going on.. because it was not my post.. so again.. assumptions can take over the truth by a long shot. as with the meds.. no one knew why she got upset so easily because as i said.. the 4 of us use to joke all the time.. so what was so different this time?? no one knew about her father.. and if we knew the story behind everything.. it would never have been said.. because as i said.. no one wanted to hurt anyone.. and again.. apologies were made.. and as for CAPS.. i can use them if i choose too as it is my brain that im using.. NOT YOURS..

for one.. it doesnt matter that no names were given… the fact is.. IT WAS about greeneyes.. WE ALL know that.. so again.. it was tactless to be made.. as for the first post.. AGAIN.. READ THE POST THAT ORIGINALLY STARTED ALL OF THIS… you can not believe one story.. hear another and judge another.. you have to read it for yourself and know that when everyone found out that diane was upset… it upset us all… because we didnt not intend on that happening.. AND if you look close.. we were picking on each other NOT JUST DIANE… so again.. READ THE POST.. and until you do.. you will never know what really happened.. just assumptions.. for you to state that no one has seen diane like that before… you are right.. NO ONE HAS.. i have talked to diane probably a lot longer than she has you… AND I HAVE NEVER seen her hurt like this.. so now what??? what kind of crap excuse do you have for that one?? as for me .. im on medication.. and it can be seen when they are working… my moods change and i become very hurt by everything.. so for anyone to choose to say that maybe its the meds… i would have probably thought that same thing… due to myself being on meds and know how they can react if you dont have the right dose… again.. its assumption because no one ever saw diane hurt before.. again.. i personally have never seen her hurt like that before… and diane had talked to me a lot before and never once said anything about how her father died and she thought it was her fault.. so again… until you know what is going through someone else’s mind or know the truth about what REALLY happened.. do not judge..

D created that post for processing and closure, and if you care to read it back, was very hazy and gave no details. It was something that she felt she needed to do personally.

And when green realised from the first post that they weren’t in fact the friends that they thought they were, what then was green’s justification for continuing in this way in this second post? It’s only because of her comment in this second post that it all came out.

And then, according to you, green was remorseful for her second slip-up. I beg to differ,as far from being remorseful, she then went on to consider reasons for D’s ‘overreaction’! She suggested that D overreacts because of her meds. Tactless and hurtful comments. You say it’s because they’ve not seen her like this. I beg to differ. They barely knew each other to start with!!

If someone speculated that we overreact because of meds, we’d flip. So why should Diane be any different?

as for the second time… as i said.. some times written things do not sound anything like they were meant to sound like.. as for the thing about the med situation.. no one knew why she was upset.. and again… as you are doing.. assumptions were made.. just so that they could try and figure out why she got hurt.. and again.. that is where assumptions are bad.. because no one knows the truth… they assume which causes even more pain.. no one knew that the reason behind everything was due to her father.. so assuming that maybe her meds were off or not working right.. probably was a suggestion made because they never seen her like this before.. again.. assuming… and as for being ruthless and such… making a post about someone belittling them is not something that would help things in this matter either… so yeah.. i guess we can call it tactless cant we?

hold up a minute.. AS I SAID.. READ THE DAMN POST… we were making fun of each other the entire post… joking around about little things at each other… that is what friends do.. so if you are not going to read the entirety of the post.. believe what you want.. as the rest of us know the truth..

actually i recall you calling her stupid and other names.. so there was trashing done. as i said.. until you know the exact truth behind what actually happened.. then stop trashing greeneyes.. as i said.. take the time to read the entirety of the post rather than hearing one side of it.. you will then see and know that greeneyes was just as hurt to know that she hurt a friends feelings.

and again.. until you know me personally.. you would know that i laugh about everything about myself… because i know when a friend is joking.. so there is no rule just for me..

the point being is they were trying to come to a conclusion to what really happened.. why did it bother her so much… as we all use to be able to joke about everything.. so again.. assumptions hurt and throw the truth out of whack.. so again.. until you know the exact truth and what really happened.. stop trashing greeneyes.. as i said.. apologies were given and thanked for the apology.. no one knew what was really wrong and why it bothered her so much… so again.. it was assumed…

Lilbit,
Diane went in there to leave green a shout and read her own name in there. Any of us in that situation would have read it.
The comment about meds is an opinion. No contexts involved, so I disagree with you entirely.

and there is the problem in itself… reading someone elses shouts.. that is called stalking.. trying to come up with reasons to get pissy and cause drama. greeneyes is not relentless.. and if you .. AGAIN.. read the entirety of the post.. you would understand the truth rather than what is being said from one side.

well.. i have to say that i have said things that seemed like it was meant to sound a bit differently… it is different when you write over saying it in person.. as for what was said in shouts.. for one… they are suppose to be meant for the two people talking.. not for everyone to get involved just to start crap between everyone.. im sure this was all said long before we knew the exact reason behind the feelings that diane was feeling… because of her father.. and you are right.. assumptions are never good.. but again.. until you know the entirety of the story.. dont believe everything you hear with out reading or knowing personally what really happened.. because that causes drama..

Right, so Green said two offensive things and apologised twice. Why then did she go on to say that she thought it was ‘the meds making Diane irrational’?!
If your mate opens her mouth to take her foot out, rather than to put her other foot in, then I would agree that we were dragging this on. Unfortunately though, it seems that she is incapable of this.

and we all realize what happened and how it offended her.. apologies were given… it would be different if she just left it be and kept talking about the situation… for one.. if you read the entirety of the post… we were all picking on each other… it was in no way to be intended to hurt anyone.. including diane.. as we all considered her a friend.. so that is why the post was stopped immediately and apologies were made. you are acting as if it continued with out a sorry to be given.. criticizing greeneyes still to this day.. and again.. if you noticed and bother to ask diane or read the shouts between the two.. it was settled.. an apology was given and an apology was accepted… it should have ended there… but no.. it didnt.. as for defending diane.. we all sent our deepest apologies to her… letting her know the exact same thing im letting you know here.. it was not intended to hurt anyone.. nor did we know the reason behind why it hurt so much.. as friends.. we all joked around with each other.. including diane… so who knew this would hurt her.. AGAIN.. re read the dang post and you will see what was said rather than assuming and taking things way out of context such as you are. i believe this is getting blown way out of porportion and needs to be looked at more carefully.. and with what was said to her on the other post.. if you realize that as i said before.. the sorry was accepted.. but still in yet.. a post was made to degrade greeneyes in which it was hurting her again.. so who is really in the wrong here??? the one who misspoke or the one keeping the issue continuing.. ???

my friend is not tactless.. the post got out of hand and it came to our notice through out all the busting on everyone that some one got hurt! it wasnt a post to pick on diane.. it was a post to pick on everyone.. myself included. it was not known that it would hurt one of the people we considered a friend.. and once it was known that she was hurt.. greeneyes was hurt as well.. because she didnt intend on hurting anyone. this whole thing has been blown way out of proportion and for you to attack someone who was already given a thank you for the apologies is wrong on your part.. the thing that gets me the most is how you can keep it going and calling names and belittling greeneyes.. it was said and done…. things were ok.. until you get in there and start the whole ball rolling again… now that i consider to be a bit childish and attention seeking.

well.. i have to say that im pretty much upset with how you treated greeneyes on brighterblessings post. it upsets me that we all use to be friends on here. the post in which hurt brighter’s feelings was just a joke.. things being said were not intended on being hurtful to anyone.. and if given the time to read through the entirety of the post.. you would have seen that we were picking on each other.. but once it was realized that someone got hurt over it.. the post was closed and apologies were made.. no one.. including me understood why it was so hurtful until brighter mentioned it in her post. and again… apologies were made and apologies were taken for what happened.. you have to understand that brighter was not the only one upset with what happened… greeneyes too was upset for hurting someone she cared about… and felt horrible.. not to mention all of us others who felt horrible for what happened and how both of them were feeling.. and then we receive a shout stating that brighter would like the shouts to stop… and here you are sitting here calling greeneyes stupid and all this other stuff… how rude is that?? and as for the emails… sending her emails because everyone else is… what the hell is that about… the emails being sent have nothing to do with what is going on.. i feel as though this whole thing is being played up for a large hate party and im sick of it. its childish and rude how greeneyes is being treated over something that was forgiven and apologized for… just plain ridiculous.

Hi Cookie,
Just a quick note. I have written to everyone who’s been talking about what happened and asked that all the conversations please stop today. I would like all the discussions and comments in shouts to please stop. I don’t want anyone to be hurt further, you, me or any other user on the site. I would like to let all this go and move on.

I’m so glad for the friends I have made here and I enjoy having the opportunity to get to know you, Sam and a few others offline. I hope things are going well for you and look forward to talking soon. Have a really nice day.

Hi there cookie dough thank you for the birthday message, It was a lovely thing to receive from all my friends at help :). I hope you have a great day too :) Take care

Ben

Cookie, I appreciate your support and friendship.Please do not feel you have to choose sides. I’ve been an emotional person my entire life (before cancer, before the death of my Father, before any of the hard stuff). I started removing myself from things here tonight with the few minutes I have and I will do more next time I am on. I will answer any remaining shouts and invites to close the book.

There is a good book called Please Understand Me I think it was written by Kiersey. It has a personality test in it. I am in the rare group (1% of the population). I am going to head off the computer now. I am behind in everything and have a lot to accomplish this week. Not sure I will be back on. Don’t lose friends over me Sweetie. When I come back, I’ll see where things are and go from there. But I am just not sure this is the right place for me. Have a good week and take good care of yourself. I hope the grief counseling is going well. I am sorry I haven’t asked about that lately.

Beware! It’s loud. Very loud.

http://youtube.com/watch?v=m9fQUbsNNr…

Hello, nice to meet you. OH my computers are down except for this one. Using it to install stuff…here. I wanted you to feel my support.
-n

Don’t be mad. I’m pretty computer illiterate and don’t have too many friends but I think all of you are swell people. Thank you Cookie. I love you, too. Sorry about the post.

Thank you. That would be nice.

Hey Farah!

All is well!I’ve been out of town and not so active on here. But I should be back to my normal self next week hehe.

Thanks for caring! How are you doing by the way?

Hello Farrah, You are an amazing woman of strength, and your life gives your husband and your marriage such honor and pride ( DId that sound right?????)

God Bless you, if you ever need to chat…
Thank you for sharing your story… May God continue to comfort you and give you strength.
I admire your courage!
Your friend, Shannon

I didn’t write to anyone, except for inviting those specific people by email to “help with that post.”

Happy Earth day (and Children’s Week where I am.)

*hugs* Thank you so much for your kind words to that poster…. those were beautiful thoughts you shared. I’m sure it will touch her deeply! And I’m so sorry for your loss of your husband and more recently your friend Jason too. :( You seem very strong, and I knew you had wisdom you could offer. Thanks so much!!!

Farrah… thanks for taking the time to share your wisdom and information with me. I really do appreciate it, but the only way I feel helpful around here is scanning posts and responses and profiles until the coincidence of my thoughts and the needs in front of my produces a situation where I have an idea I think might be helpful. It’s so embarrassing, I look at all the invites and have nothing really helpful to say. um, how are you?

Cookie Dough-one more thing- we football fans in Miami eagerly await the NFL Draft on Saturday. Who do you think the Dolphins should draft? I am assuming you are a Dolphin fan. Now I say so long-be happy and take care-Paul

Cookie this is Paul. I just wanted to send a special thanks as your feedback helped me out. In your case I would make an exception to my age rule however I see you already have 34 nfriends. I would be curious to have an E-Mail friend who is Islamic as being Jewish I would love to discuss the differences the religions have and maybe we could each learn from each other. There is so much hate in ths world however in the end Hashem will bring the Moessiah and we will have happiness and peace. That is my strong belief and I realize there are many other beliefs.

In closing this will be the last you will hear from me so I wish you happiness and I am sorry about the loss of your husband. Be well and may you have health, happiness and only wonderful things in your life. Sincerely-Paul- A man you have helped more than you know.

PS- I now realize how my profile could scare people off. Thanks again- Paul

Myspace Friends Comments & Graphics

I hope you will be one of my flowers!

I agree that this matter should be at a close, but me being me, I must clear what I am afraid is a slight misunderstanding between you and I that I do not wish to have, because I like you.

I am greatful that they have talked, I wanted that more then anything because I treasure them both.

My shout from Diane (not used to calling her that, lol) is when I learned that others had said unkind things to her, that I did not know and am not happy about, she doesn’t deserve any unkindness.

Please know that I was not saying that you were intentionally kicking anyone when they were down, I thought that I had stressed that point. I do think that you are a very caring person.

I suppose on this we will have to agree to disagree because I don’t think that is a friends place to reprimand a friend when they are already upset by their own actions, if we must speak to them about their actions we should wait until the rawness of emotion heals.

I also think friends should be allowed to do and say things that others can’t and that includes joking about our traits.

I hope that this thing that probably should have been left between the two of them will not effect our budding friendship, because as I said, I do like you.

Cookie, I do have a big sense of humor. It just comes out. She explained she has had trouble with mean shouts and mean comments on post. She disclosed it concerned her “talking too much”. I didn’t know this was said, and that it hurt her. Here I blunder in and say the same thing kidding. It must of really been the straw that broke Diane’s back. I appreciate your concern and help so much. You’ve been very gracious and helpful in resolving this. It mean a lot to me that you would assist in repairing this friendship. You really made my day with your first shout this morning. I agree with you looking in retrospect, its probably best not to make fun of anyone, you never know their spirits or how it may really affect them. But my fingers get to flying faster than my brain, and humor comes to me at will. Seems like a pretty bad combination huh? I’ve been this way all my life. Your story was a riot.
Thanks for sharing. I really appreciate your kind opinion and lesson. No insult taken. I am quite grateful to you. Thanks
Loved the storm in a teacup term. Never heard it. Sounds British. Your a doll. Hugs

I know this is none of my business, but I went to shout Greeneyes because I’ve been worried about her over what happened with Kneady and I saw your shout.

I understand your feelings and I also understand that Kneady was hurt and I hate that, but Greeneyes did not mean to hurt her, she was teasing a friend, she’s been beating herself up ever since and feels bad enough about what happened without someone kicking her when she is already down. I’m not saying that was your intention, I just don’t think you realized how bad she already felt over this.

This whole thing got blown out of porportion and it’s really sad, because two of my friends are hurt and there is nothing that can be done until they talk and work it out, but now I don’t even know if that is going to happen, because Greeneyes says she’s going leave.

I apprecite your words. I told her the same thing. It honestly struck me funny. Her with her vast amount of info in a chat room.
I meant no harm. I feel she is a wealth of knowledge here. She shares her time and wisdom. I have said the very same as you. I even shouted her and said hey Im making fun of you on this post. We always kidded and talked. She was hurt and I feel bad. I never expected to harm her. I will leave. I decided. I thank you for shouting me. You do a great job out there.

Thank you for the kind words.

As I am not about here very much, you will have to forgive me if it takes some time before I reply to you.

I am making a new website, this is taking up a lot of my time in the dark hours of the day. My garden is taking up most of my time in the daylight hours.

I am lso finding time to visit model making exhibitions and other stuff.

If you leave a message for me I will answer it as soon as I see it.

Hey sister!!

He does look very happy.
I’m doing ok now, and yes, Help.com seems to be at least a nice distraction from most things.
Hope you’re well.

Thankyou. :D
And wow your avatar is truly a beautiful photo.
Those clothes are wonderful, are they for a special occasion?