Jackie Chan's profile at Help.com

Mini-Profile

ATTENTION: this commentary is not for real. it is merely an attempt at humor.

Some time last Thursday, help.com was licked out of the ice by Audhumla the Primeval Cow.

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On the March the fifth, Ditto Cops was born to the proud, and batshit crazy, gelgamish. It was ’set up purely to facilitate tracking of which help accounts have been “excomunicat’d”.’ (from the UserInfo)

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In its first five days, it produced 1,246 comments and 21 posts. This includes a period of restricted commenting (apparently due to trolling) and a period of restricted joining (again, apparently due to trolling).

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At first, it merely listed Journals which had appeared on help.com. Presumably, the philosophy was that these posts were no longer safe from the evil bastards who run -name of site here-.

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As gelgamish wrote after being asked why she posted a long list of usernames

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They’re (the listed names) the compromised mods that have been made viewable by anonymous people, on the mods owners’ friends lists in many cases - quite a fair proportion of those entries are FO.

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Sorry I didn’t get around to posting an explanation - I was too busy cataloguing from 1am this morning

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Over time (six hours), it became less about alerting the public of the danger that they were in, and more about plotting the destruction of -name of website here-. For this, we can thank the mtf rm.

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Finally, it became the playground of people who just liked to rile up the crazy people. gelgimish spectacularly causes the conspiracy theorists to go into overdrive. Props to whomever.

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Ingeniously, drama paid for the Ditto Cops ! This proves that they are merely trying to protect the individual’s right to freedom of speech and freedom from help.com is in maintenence mode’ messages.

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The crazies could now comment as rapidly as possible.

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Alas, on March the seventh, gelgimish put the community on hiatus (and even made a little banner to promote the point) for 48 hours.

Only time will tell what will happen next…
Psychological profile of Ditto Cops

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The orange colour scheme does seem to imply an inner struggle with identity. This implication is further implied by the nature of the posts; at first they were about protecting the people, but then about destroying another group of people. This weird identity clash hinges around a very interesting dichotomy. They want to be protectors (just like the Police) but, at the same time, they have an inbuilt passion to cause pain to the people who have hurt them (just like the Police).

They also have a very distorted grasp of the law (just like the Police) and how it should be applied (just like the Police) and by whom it should be applied (just like the Police).

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They also have gender issues, but this could be entirely due to the androgynous character of both gilgimish and her good friends.

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That last comment was an ad hominem. It was also accurate.
Ditto Cops according to the Bible

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There are two passages that might imply a knowledge of Ditto Cops by the Biblical prophets and God:

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“Wrath has gone forth, a whirling tempest; it will burst on the head of the wicked.” (Jeremiah 30:23)

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“Therefore her plagues will come in a single day - pestilence and mourning and famine - and she will be burned with fire.” (Revelation 18:8)