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• Looking for a poem posted (5 months) ago
  I don’t have any idea what it’s called. I think I first saw it in a book…probabl…

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Dragon_Lady's Top (5) Replies by other users' votes

• (4 votes) Why my life?
  

  [sigh]
  
  First child drops her binky: Mom picks it up, washes it hot soapy water, boils it on the stove, and air-dries it for a day before giving it back.
  
  Second child drops her binky: Mom washes it hot soapy water.
  
  Third child drops her binky: Mom washes it hot water.
  
  Fourth child drops her binky: Mom wipes it on her sleeve.
  
  We as parents start learning -sometimes erroneously- that children are much tougher than we think. We develop habits when taking care of one, and we keep that habit. But than we realize we’re workin’ on bunnies off and the kid is fine…so we relax a bit with the next one, and that becomes a habit with that one.
  
  Pretty soon, we’re on auto-pilot. And we treat each kid according to the habits we formed when they were babies. The oldest child goes on being “first”, and so we go on being more careful. The youngest goes on being the “last” to try new things, and we go on noticing that the other three were fine, and so shall this one be.
  
  I didn’t know this, until about three months ago when my children confronted me with a laundry list of complaints just like this one. I’m trying to break those habits, and make everyone know that I do love them equally. But I realize now they spent years thinking the older ones were more special to me, just because of tiny habits that I wasn’t even aware of.
  
  Don’t let it eat at you. And don’t resent your parents over it. Raising kids is the world’s toughest job, and none of us ever get it completely right, no matter how much we’d like to.
  
  - written 4 months, 1 week ago – voted for by Richard cor de lyon, qΛ§Ħ - AWAY, sixteenraining, lilmissanime0

• (4 votes) Should a person live a life of suffering for the sake of their family and friends?
  

  [sigh]
  
  The problem with being suicidal is the tunnel vision. The inability to really “see” what is around you. :( Of course you are aware -you see the sun come up, you see your family members trying to understand.
  
  But, you only feel the pain you’re in…and that pain blots everything else out. Just like a person with a broken leg doesn’t give a **** what color the ambulance is -it’s just not important!!!
  
  But…depression and the problems causing the suicidal state can be treated and altered. By changing your viewpoint, you change your reality.
  
  Please don’t suicide. Work out your problems. Granted it’s hard work, and sometimes it just won’t seem like the hill is worth the climb. But hang in there, and things will get better. Grasp those moments that make it all worth it to you -a baby’s smile, a good report, a great Christmas gift…whatever makes YOU happy, and hold on tight. Don’t let anything or anyone take those away from you; not even you, yourself. :)
  
  - written 5 months, 1 week ago – voted for by babacup, Rahat Lokum, sans-sans, rouuaet

• (3 votes) Why Can’t I Get Over This
  

  Yes; sorry to say, I think you’re wasting your time. She’s stringing you along because she wants a “boyfriend back guarantee” in case her new relationship doesn’t work.
  
  You deserve better than that. You deserve to the be the one she wants, not just the one she’ll take if nothing she likes better is in sight.
  
  Just gradually move away. Stop thinking about her. Stop rescuing her. Stop being available
  
  - written 4 months, 1 week ago – voted for by zurb, qΛ§Ħ - AWAY, ambrutellow

• (2 votes) I don’t know what to f******** do anymore.
  

  You need to see a doctor. Just understanding you’re depressed isn’t enough. Just talking to someone isn’t enough. You need real, professional, medical help.
  
  There are medicines that will help rebalance your brain chemistry. This is a physical problem, and it requires a physical cure.
  
  - written 3 weeks, 1 day ago – voted for by Morgan, smicki

• (2 votes) my mom lives alone & is in her late 60’s.
  

  [sigh]
  
  As a long-term smoker who just cannot quit, I understand your Mom’s position.
  
  That said…I smoke outside. Now. For years, I insisted I wouldn’t do that. Smoking is something we become more and more defensive about, because we’re attacked on all sides.
  
  Finally, my DH just told me that if my kids had health problems because of my smoking, I was going to have to face it head-on and realize my own culpability. Of course, he was right, but it took me a long time to be able to admit that.
  
  I think that if she must live with you, you will have to lay down the law and insist that your home is no-smoking zone. And tell her that before she ever arrives. If she argues, shake your head and remind her there are nursing homes available, and that she only may or may not be allowed to smoke there at all.
  
  Fix her up a place where she can smoke. Outside or maybe in the garage. It needs to be sheltered from the wind and weather, and become “her” place. A comfy chair, a table…a place for a book or two. If she’s uncomfortable there, she’ll start sneaking them in the house. Don’t be surprised if she practically lives in that spot.
  
  Try to accomodate her in other ways. Visit with her in her spot, invite her in to help with meals…don’t make her feel like she’s been shunned or is less important because she smokes. It’s her HABIT you don’t want, not HER.
  
  Remember that your still her daughter, and she’ll be very resistant to taking instructions from you, so be nice about it, and don’t be surprised if you get a bit of a fight.
  
  - written 4 months, 2 weeks ago – voted for by 30ishinPA, Florie

Last 5 Replies – All 1,611 replies »

• I can’t do it anymore it hurts to much to pretend…
  

  1-800-4-a-child. Call them. Tonight. They can and will help you right away.
  - written 2 days, 23 hours ago

• How can I have a painless death.
  

  [quote watoglaigmu]no future - no life - past pulled out from under me like a cheap carpet at my feet — why bother any more — i have lived on hope only to find it never comes thru — now all is lost — i have tried religion — love — hope — dreams — medication — therapy –etc..– they are useless in this life and when all turn their back on you that you thought all your life cared — what truly is left — a painful existence — death is peace — death is forever — death is what I seek…[/quote]
  
  When all have turned their backs, that is the time for a new beginning. Find a hobby, adopt a dog, move to Australia. Find something you’ve never found before and become stronger than you’ve ever been.
  - written 1 week, 5 days ago

• how come the chick from “Buffalo 66″ liked it when she got kidnapped and fell in love with him wtf?
  

  Try Googling it. There’s probably lots of information about how it happens and what to do about it.
  - written 2 weeks, 3 days ago

• ****, she wants to leave me
  

  Find someone who chooses to see the best of you. There are enough people in life seeing the rest.
  - written 2 weeks, 4 days ago

• i really want to hurt one of my ex’s emotionally
  

  It’s a woman’s right to change her mind.
  
  You had the right to decide where you wanted to be; and you chose her. But she had the right to choose too, and she chose someone else. She wasn’t your hostage, and she wasn’t your child. She is an adult, and has the right to be happy and comfortable.
  
  Let her go. If you really loved her, respect her decisions and wish her well.
  - written 2 weeks, 4 days ago

Dragon_Lady's conversations are tagged:

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