MelodyAnn's reply history at Help.com

I often have trouble letting go myself. I always refer to this poem:

Letting Go
Author unknown

To “let go” does not mean to stop caring,
it means I can’t do it for someone else.

To “let go” is not to cut myself off,
it’s the realization I can’t control another.

To “let go” is not to enable,
but to allow learning from natural consequences.

To “let go” is to admit powerlessness,
which means the outcome is not in my hands.

To “let go” is not to try to change or blame another,
it’s to make the most of myself.

To “let go” is not to care for,
but to care about.

To “let go” is not to fix,
but to be supportive.

To “let go” is not to judge,
but to allow another to be a human being.

To “let go” is not to be in the middle arranging the outcomes,
but to allow others to affect their own destinies.

To “let go” is not to be protective,
it’s to permit another to face reality.

To “let go” is not to deny,
but to accept.

To “let go” it not to nag, scold or argue,
but instead to search out my own shortcomings, and correct them.

To “let go” is not to adjust everything to my desires
but to take each day as it comes,
and cherish myself in it.

To “let go” is not to criticize and regulate anybody
but to try to become what I dream I can be.

To “let go” is not to regret the past,
but to grow and live for the future.

To “let go” is to fear less,
and love more.

Thank you for your advice. It gives me a whole new outlook1

Well, it’s been like this for over a year….haha LOL Like I said when he drinks a little he has a lot to say, although without a drop of alcohol totally boring conversation.

How long does this last? I feel retarded after I get off the phone with him.

It’s an awkward conversation, and then he says he will call me later…Is that normal?

Well, I can totally relate. The older child is experiencing mostly everything for the first time, and the baby is just “so cute.” It gets old really quick. When I was in my teen years I tried to rebel to get their attention. I would honestly sit down and talk with your parents. You don’t necessarily have to say you are upset, because they aren’t spending enough time with you. However, that would help. I would start asking my parents to do things with me, like ask them to go to a movie, etc. I am sure that it isn’t intentional. I also found it helpful to reach out to others, and work on my independence.

I am a middle child also, and I am now 23 years old. My feelings about being a middle child were different at different ages. I am just trying to relate to you!

Usually if you call your bank and explain what happened they will take your overdraft fees away. Explain yourself and what will happen if the overdraft isn’t refunded.

How old are you?

I experienced the same thing, although it was my cousin. It happened when I was 5 to 9, and I didn’t tell my mother until I was 18. I think it helped to talk to a counselor. She was able to help me in ways that my friends couldn’t understand. There are also numerous books that I have read over the years that have helped me. Let me know if you would like more information.

I am the same way, I had a counselor once tell me that I had to get uncomfortable. He said that if I wanted to change I had to force the change. He had me make a list of things that I would love to do to meet people, and then each week I had to complete one of them….good luck!

I would never pass judgement on anyone to start off with! I have several friends who have had abortions and all of them are in therapy from the experience. I would definitely talk to someone who has been through an abortion. I am sure if you call plan parenthood they would be able to assist you!

Read the book women who love too much….It is great, and remember no man will break you!