guitarlegend_12's reply history at Help.com

Sometimes we have to get lost to find ourselves. Give it time, and you will learn to love again. Somebody unexpected will come into your life that will change your perspectives and your feelings towards love. Somebody will eventually knock down those barriers that you have put up to keep the pain out. Just look after yourself before anyone else and take your time with new relationships. Don’t rush into things, or your confidence may be shattered again.

Ohhh dear :( I’m in exactly the same situation as you…I don’t know what to say to him or how to tell him that I lied. I really have strong feelings for the man…Just tell the truth, and hope that if he cares about you as much as he said he did, he will forgive you. If you’re going to be 17 anyway, it shouldn’t be too much of a problem, right?

Since you use food as an escape from depression, you should take up some sort of physical exercise. Exercise not only will help you shift unwanted weight, but makes you feel good about yourself and releases a hormones called endorphins that make you happy. I suggest that you take up a martial art, because it gives you self-dicipline and will power (to help you stay away from food), it is a mojor confidence boost and will tone up your body in a fun and exciting way. It is also great to know that you can defend yourself. Try to take up a martial art that also encompasses Tai Chi or Qui Gong, which are breathing exercises that help you calm yourself and stop depression. I practise the martial art of Shaolin Kung fu, maybe you should look into it :)

As for your diet, just try to cut back on crisps, chocolate and fatty foods and eat moderate portions of well-balanced meals. This will help you lose weight in a healthy way rather than using crash diets or starving yourself, as these can really harm your body.

Good luck!

I’ve always been known as the ‘crazy party animal’, so most people know what I’m like anyway. I just feel guilty for being violent for no reason really :| But I know it won’t happen again and it makes me feel better that I can make up for it at the next party :D

Has anybody actually forgotten that we are talking about a persons life here? Don’t get me wrong if someone felt they could not cope with pregnancy then I would support an abortion but I think some people are being too casual with the fact that you could be throwing away a tiny little life! :( If you think you couldn’t cope with a baby at your age or you are concerned about what your family think, then put it up for adoption rather than having an abortion. Don’t forget, abortions can affect your ability to have children in the future and it can also emotionally scar you since most mothers grow very attached to the unseen child. If you and your boyfriend are in a stab;e relationship, and you really want to have this baby then I see no reason why you shouldn’t. You’re 18 now, and have control over your own life so sometimes it’s okay not to respect your families wishes. Try to remember that your happiness comes first, and that eventually they would warm up to a new grandchild in the family. Chances are they are just worried about your education, thinking that having a child at your age would be a burden and would stop you reaising your potential. But even if you can or can’t keep it, I suggest you still go through childbirth. Unless of course you don’t think you would be able to cope with pregnancy or the child would have a horrible quality of life.

Good luck to you :) I wish you the very best.

Nooooo no no no that was the first time I have ever got properly violent, but only because I was on the verge of becoming paraletic. I drink quite regularly just not to that extent. I’m usually an incredibly happy drunk :) Just as long as I don’t drink too much. Which I now know what to do. My only concern is my friends really. I love people!:)

What colour eyebrows do you have? If you have very fair eyebrows and you dye your hair black it may look slightly silly. However you can always get your eyebrows tinted if necessary! :) Chances are your hairdresser won’t turn your hair black straight away, because sometimes you need an inbetween colour before you go darker or only a semi rather than a full head. Just ask your stylist what he/she thinks about the idea. If they think it will look ridiculous chances are it probably will. I’m sure you’ll make the right decision though :D

Hope this helped

There’s lots of things you can do =) If you just keep a level head and be totally relaxed around her then she will feel comfortable and safe around you.
Start flirting with her first and see if she flirts back. If you get signals that she’s into you turn it up a notch. But make sure you don’t dive into anything deep or be too forward with her until you’re sure she feels the same way…it may cause embarrassment for you both.

Slip her the occasional nice compliment such as ‘you look really pretty today’ and try to chat to her as both a friend and love interest. Just don’t go into anything sexual unless you’re sure she will be totally cool with it. Also, try not to be full on all of the time - girls don’t like that when they are courting guys, so wait sometimes until she starts a conversation first instead of looking desperate to talk to her all the time.

Just be yourself and you’ll be fine, I’m sure she will be flattered if you can be yourself around her. If things develop further do as you said above, offer to do something when your both free. If she turns you down then don’t worry about it too much. There’s plenty more fish in the sea, and it obviously wasn’t meant to happen.

But to end on a positive note…I wish you the best of luck =)

Before you make friends and want other people to like you, you have to learn to like yourself. If you hate yourself, it shows on the outside and makes you very unnaproachable, so people aren’t likely to want to talk to you. Even if you think you are ‘ugly’ then take another look. Beauty is only skin deep, and who you are as a person can make a whole lot of difference. If these girls in your class don’t want to be your friend because of the way you look then they are stupid, shallow and pathetic and a total waste of your time. But by reading your post it doesn’t seem that you interact much of mingle with yours peers. Instead of trying to fit in, you should say f**k you! and be who you are. No matter who throws insults at you, just take a deep breath, keep your head high and your shoulders back and be proud of who you are.

I hate to say this, but it is true. If you look good, you feel good. If you really have issues and think you are ugly, try to think of healthy ways to improve your appearance. For example you said you had acne, the way to solve that is by eating a blanced diet filled with lots of vitamins (fruit and veg) and plenty of water. Also, you could go to your doctor and he could give you medicine to clear it up. You don’t have to be superficial and shallow to wear make-up either. I wear make-up because I believe that it improves my appearance therefore makes me feel good about myself. Just try putting on some mascara and a slick of lip balm or something when you think you are having an ‘ugly’ day, it will make you look and feel a whole lot better, outside and in. You don’t have to cake it on, just apply some minimalist makeup and you’ll be laughing.

Personally, I think that if you are having serious problems at school, then maybe you should talk to your parents about moving schools, where you can start again and have a clean slate with some new people. If you worry about you’r issues too much they could affect your grades and even your future.

This is my advice and if you chose to follow it, it is up to you. :)

Good luck and I wish you all the best for your future =)

Hello! =)

By the sounds of it, you are going through a rough time, and I empathise with your situation. But, even after reading this, I think you are a really cool person =) You are obviously very brave, and although I have never cut myself, nor do I intend to it is good of you that you have stopped. =)
As for not knowing who you are, remember you are still young, and many people take years to figure out who they are. I know what it’s like to grow up and be confused about the things around me. I am also a teenager and am only a year older than you, but you have to remember that when we grow up we get all mixed emotions due to hormones etc.
When I get upset or feel sad I sing/play music/draw/or meditate (I do kung fu) and it makes me feel better. It’s great that you do art and use it as an escape but try not to over anylise everything you do, this will bring your creative flow back. Try not to worry and stress over small details. If you do this you will get back to loving your art and your life again. Our teen years aren’t for worrying or being stressed. Sure, we are going to get hurt here and there with the odd boyfriend, stressful exams and annoying parents, but we all should be partying and enjoying our younger years while we still have them =)
Try looking at life from a different perspective (like they teach you in Bhuddism) and think of the positive things in your life. Also instead of cutting, I suggest taking up some form of martial art or Tai Chi to allow you to release your anger and emotions. Trust me, it works everytime. =)

Good luck and all the best for your future, you have a bright future ahead of you with lots of possibilities and amazing new people to meet =)

Hope this helped.

Okay, well, personally I think that with the right precautions, meeting someone that you’ve only spoken to online is okay. Obviously it doesn’t really compare with meeting someone face to face for the first time, because you can easily tell if the person you are talking to is genuine or not, from first impressions. Meeting people online is perfectly normal and acceptable, some of my friends do it and have met their ‘online friends’ with no problem =) However, with certain people you have to be careful that they are not hiding behind an ‘internet personality’. By this I mean saying they are one thing when really they are another. I don’t just mean a 45 year old man pretending to be 16, I also mean someone who pretends they have certain personality traits, which in actual fact they don’t. Also (not meaning to be shallow) the pictures they send you could be posed/photoshoped, or not even photos of themselves, so don’t be fooled.
I agree with some of the above, you are still in danger even though you are a 20 year old man because this girl you are meeting could turn out to be a psychotic madman with a knife who has intentions of hurting you.
This happens rarely, but you have to be careful just in case it happens to you.
To stop something like this from happening, I suggest that you ask to see this girl on webcam, and also speak to her on the phone to make sure she is genuinely who she says she is. Also, if you are really worried ask if it would be okay if you brought a friend along and meet her in a public place where lots of people can see you.
I’m sure the girl you are speaking to is genuine, and that you have nothing to worry about, but I thought I would give you some advice anyway =P

Goodluck! =) hope I helped

I also apologise for my bad language in my previous comment. Sorry everyone!

in the post. 3 weeks. lol

I don’t really know. My dad has always been VERY overprotective since (not being vain at all in any way here, it’s the truth) I get a lot of male attention.
I guess they don’t want me to feel like I had to the day we broke up. But in all honesty even when we were going out and they know neither of our parents thought it was a good idea.

well, basically because when we broke up last time, we broke up BAD. It was right before christmas and in all honesty my parents didn’t really like him anyway.
But their opinion doesn’t matter to me. All I want to do is be able to see him.