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• I cheated but it wasn’t physical- how can I win him back?
  

  WELL of course I am guilty this is the worst thing I have ever done in any relationship and this is the best relationship I have ever been in before. I feel absolutely terribly about it. Maybe I carry guilt A LOT more than most people. I am a very sensitive person i get stressed and frustraighted very easily.
  
  I will never do it again- I totally learned from this, I am way too afraid of losing him, and I get it now if that makes any sense.
  
  If Mark had done this to me, I would be extremely frustraighted but I would give him more chances than he has fingers and toes- some people thats naive but I view it based on each individual situation, what caused this to happen. I am not one to be walked all over and I have common sense, but each situation is different and if had done the same thing I would be forgiving I would of course have a tough time doing it, but I would because we have so much more in our relationship than just that.
  
  Although, he would never do it..
  - written 5 months, 2 weeks ago

• I cheated but it wasn’t physical- how can I win him back?
  

  Thank you! Thank you so much he has this website link he’ll be reading that too :) Hopefully he still wants to give it a try- I don’t get anymore chances after this.
  - written 5 months, 2 weeks ago

• I cheated but it wasn’t physical- how can I win him back?
  

  I tried the yahoo things as you said, VERY negative..
  - written 5 months, 2 weeks ago

• I cheated but it wasn’t physical- how can I win him back?
  

  and this is what he wrote back to her:
  
  hi Jen,
  
  it really sucks that this is the first time we’ve talked about anything in… i dont even remember the last time we talked… and this subject isnt the prettiest either.
  
  i really dont know what to do, im on the other side of the world and there’s no chance my company will send me back over anything short of losing a limb before the 28th. i know sam feels really bad about this and she needs an answer as to whats gonna happen now but really i dont know, i cant give her an answer without seeing her in person to see the look in her eyes to see how sorry she really is and i really cant come up with one overnight.
  
  i know sam feels alone in vancouver and i just dont know what else to do, she asked me if we could get a puupy to keep her company, so i bought her a puppy, we were sick of paying rent to live in crappy apartments with landlords spending all of our money so we bought a condo, she wanted to go to school, so i told her to go down and check it out. i feel like i was willing to support her in anything that she wanted to do and all i got for it was a slap in the face and a broken heart. what i dont think she realizes is i dont have a support network of friends either, i left ns to move out to edmonton for her, i went to school and i found a good job (it so happened to be out of alberta, but there were and still arent any good ones in my field there, i do look and if i could move back there with her i would) to support us and the whole time i wanted her to be there with me, i asked her to marry me because i thought she felt the same now im not sure what to think.
  
  she says this was a big mistake and it wont happen again but how can i trust that, it hurt alot the first time and now i’ve invested so much in this emotionally that i dont want to let go but i dont know how to trust her again. i do love sam and i always will no matter how much she hurts me, no matter what happens from her on.
  
  i dont want her to have to go on begging for my love, she knows she has it, but sometimes its just hard to say.
  
  you say you know what this is like, what side were you on? and if you were in the same spot sam is in, what made you do it? (you dont have to answer that if you dont want to, i just want to have an idea of where you’re coming from)
  
  bottom line - i do love samantha, i dont know what to do, and i dont think ill know for atleast a little while, i need to clear my head
  
  sorry if this email seems a little scrambled, my mind is definatly all over the place right now. i just want to finish this job as quickly as possible and go home. thank you for your friendship.
  
  take care
  
  -Mark
  
  p.s. i sent this to sam as well, i figure it would have eventually made it to her and she does have a right to know how i feel
  - written 5 months, 2 weeks ago

• I cheated but it wasn’t physical- how can I win him back?
  

  this is what jenn then wrote to him:
  
  Hey Mark,
  
  I know you’re probably not going to be impressed to get an email from me about this, because I know its none of my business, but please, for old times sake, just hear me out okay?
  
  I understand that you probably feel betrayed, unappreciated, hurt, and taken advantage of. I don’t even know all the details about what happened, all I know is that Sam made a mistake (twice) and you found out. You have every right to feel the way you do, and to question the future of the relationship, seeing as how trust is the foundation of any given relationship. I read somewhere once this saying that goes, “It takes years to built a foundation of trust in someone, and only suspicion- not proof- to destroy it.”
  
  But Mark, this IS fixable. The nature of the issue (betrayed trust) is fixable. It’s pretty **** difficult, and it takes time, compromise, and a little blind faith in the name of love, but people have worked past problems like this before, and it’s not impossible for you two either.
  
  I guess the question is whether you WANT to or not. Maybe you’ve had enough. Maybe you don’t feel like you can ever recover such an integral piece of the relationship foundation. Maybe you both need some time apart to learn to appreciate eachother again. Who am I to say?
  
  All I ask is this one thing: either forgive her and move on with your relationship, or don’t forgive her and move on with your own life. You can’t go on with things if you’re always going to be suspicious of what she’s up to, and she can’t go on begging for your trust and affection. It’s not healthy for either of you, and I love you both too much to see you end up in an emotionally abusive tug-of-war like I was stuck in with Keith for so long.
  
  I know from experience that, no matter how much you love a person, sometimes you just can’t make it work. But I also know, that sometimes, because you love a person so much, you give that person a second (or third, or forth…) chance, when it doesn’t seem like a good idea and the logical side of you brain is screaming at you for being a fool.
  
  So, I shall (and forever will) remain impartial between you two when it comes to your relationship, but I just wanted you to know that I have faith in you both, as people and as a couple. Everything happens for a reason, and things will sort themselves out, one way or another. Time WILL heal all wounds (be it fractured trust, a damaged relationship, or a broken heart), but here’s the clincher- only if you let it.
  
  I’m thinking of you both right now…
  
  Your impartial third wheel,
  
  Jenn =)
  - written 5 months, 2 weeks ago

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