diane.335's profile at Help.com

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• i need help with my mom.
  

  You are a wonderful angel in your mothers life, even if it doesn’t feel that way right now. I have been a care-giver for many years and what you are experiencing is not easy and, unfortunatly, to common. With all of your mothers issues it is difficult , at best, to come up with a viable solution that would make you both happy. She is overwhlemed by her situation and does not have the copoing mechanisms to deal with it. Because you are her daughter she may feel more comfortable being aggressive in her behavior. You need help in setting boundries or this could turn out to be a disaster for you both. If her doctor is unwilling to reassess her “pharmacy diet” than you should run, not walk, to another doctor that will not be judging her smoking habits but will be helping you and her gain a suitable lving environment and will address her mental health and med situation. Contact as many agencies as you can about respite care so that you can get a break and some counseling for yourself so that you can have a better understanding of the situation and how to deal with both your needs. Your mom apparently has some mental health issues which brings on inappropriate behaviors. Do not take suicide threats lightly with someone who is depressed and bi-polar. Get Help Now. It is out there but you need to take the initiative. Do not rely on your mother to join you in this. She is unable to make the correct decisions for herself and is not able to see outside of her own world and grasp the impact this is having on you. Do not expect the uncles to step in. If they cared they would have by now. This situation would be overwhelming for anyone and you should not have to take on this burden alone. You are doing an amazing thing by being there for your mom and you will be grateful that you did. That does not mean that you have to do this alone. You might have to start with your local health dept. and they will direct you to the correct agencies that can offer you the assistance that you need. Do not let the situation escalate to the point that she creates an environment that is dangerous to herself or you. You need to keep control of this situation and you can not, nor are you expected, to do that alone. This is not simply an elderly mom who needs some help. You are dealing with some serious physical and mental health issues here and you need to get her better help (as far as Dr. care and agency assistance) and you some peace of mind. Best of luck and bless you for being a kind and gentle soul for you mom.
  - written 5 months ago

diane.335's conversations are tagged:

Talk About, live, post, depression, Diabetes mellitus, house, anxiety, Year, emphysema, Breakbeat