mumstheword's profile at Help.com

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Last 2 Posts Authored

• Just to let you know … posted (1 month, 3 weeks) ago
  I’m away off up into the hills until September. Not quite “fallen off the planet”…

• Wouldn’t it be a good idea if there was a dedicated page giving Helpline and National support agency numbers? posted (3 months, 1 week) ago
  Sometimes Bot pops up with an american number for those considering suicide but I think it would…

• All Claimed Posts »

mumstheword's Top (5) Replies by other users' votes

• (2 votes) I was forced to terminate my pregnancy last year without any options i have now found out that there may have been alternitive solutions.
  

  Hello Annette. I’m sorry for your grief over the loss of your child.
  
  Sometimes, we yearn for things to have turned out differently and it sounds like you are still traumatised by what occurred.
  
  It’s difficult to know what happened and why exactly. Sometimes even the doctors don’t really know. That’s a hard thing for us to deal with because we put our faith in them and we believe they have the answers.
  
  They don’t always.
  
  Now that you are pregnant again, what is most important for now is to rest and not to become stressed. You need to focus on this baby and on keeping well for him/her.
  
  Personally, I think the best way forward right now is to set your worries about what happened aside for a while until after your baby is born. Talk to the doctors again then, ask them your questions and if you feel you need to take things further, do it then.
  
  Now is not the right time to pursue any action about the past. Now is the time to look after new baby. Avoid doing anything that will stir up negative feelings and stress right now.
  
  It sounds like you have lots of good information to help you protect this pregnancy. Use it to help you remain positive.
  
  - written 2 months ago – voted for by Silverwings

• (1 vote) usually i am so positive and i can usually think of
  

  Hello Miss Flo. I’m sorry you’re going through a rough time.
  
  I have some practical ideas you might like to try to help correct that imbalance you talk of so that you can be stronger to deal with these stresses on you.
  
  Firstly, look carefully at your eating. Mums always seem to end up picking and snacking because they are just rushing around all day! Or else they eat late.. and it’s rushed..
  
  No matter what, make time to eat. Four smaller meals are better than three when you are “messed up”. Make sure you start the day with a good slow-release breakfast. Oats, natural yogurt and some fruit.
  
  Eliminate caffeine, high sugar foods and highly processed things. You need to rebalance your energy levels. Candies, biscuits, cakes and high sugar foods (take-out meals are the worst for hidden sugar and salt!) may give you an energy rush for a while but then your levels drop so dramatically that you actually feel worse.
  
  I have a lot more ideas if you think this sort of approach may help?
  
  - written 1 month, 4 weeks ago – voted for by Silverwings

• (1 vote) i am in desperate need of 1000 dollars.
  

  Contact your bank and ask if the payment can be deferred or if they will accept a partial payment this month. That might buy you time.
  
  Then check that you are getting all the benefits you are entitled to - look for information online and also ask at your local library or resource centre. All too often, people miss out because they think they are not eligible for something when they could be.
  
  Start finding ways of raking the money together and thinking about how you will cope NEXT month. Sell stuff you don’t need, do a second job, advertise your services as babysitter, gardener - whatever it takes. If you have family, get them to do their bit too!
  
  Research some money-saving tips on the net. Saving a dollar here and a dollar there can make a big difference. Start by eliminating wastage and cutting down on your energy costs. Lift share and walk instead of taking buses… every little helps.
  
  If all else fails, try www.modestneeds.org.
  
  - written 1 month, 4 weeks ago – voted for by jessica33313

• (1 vote) i need some advice.
  

  Yes they work.
  
  I still have four boxes of old-fashioned letters and cards in my attic… dating back 30 years from when we started writing to each other from different continents.
  
  We are on different continents again and have been on-and-off all this time. Happily married and staying that way.
  
  True love survives against all odds.
  
  It it’s true love, it will survive.
  
  - written 2 months ago – voted for by bbycks

• (1 vote) Dealing With An Addiction Withdrawal….
  

  Full marks to you for recognising and acknowledging a little-discussed addiction. You are absolutely right. Interenet activities, gaming.. they can become destructively overpowering.
  
  The important thing is to fill your time as much as possible with activities that are positive and give you the “buzz” that you now lack. By that I mean take up sport, find a new creative hobby, join an interest group in your locality rather than “online”. Try something new - there’s nothing quite like the sense of achievement you feel when your first effort at making a cake or painting a picture or building something is completed!
  
  If you miss the friends you made in WoW, you could find out what ELSE they enjoy and maybe broaden your discussions. Talk to them outside of WoW.
  
  Set a reasonable “time limit” for WoW conversations. Then either move on and talk about something else, or leave the conversation.
  
  Gradually you will find it becomes less of a need and more like one of many healthy interests.
  
  Good luck.
  
  - written 2 months ago – voted for by retrospace18

Last 5 Replies – All 963 replies »

• .
  

  Had to pop in (though I’m meant to be packing).
  
  I thought I’d heard it all yesterday when a “helper” on here decided to post his solution to crime and terrorism… racist genocide would be putting it mildly….
  
  Now we have direct personal attacks on the nicest of people just for “sport” it would seem.
  
  Well, just as in sport… jump on one team member… the rest of us are right behind and ready to take back our ball !
  - written 1 month, 3 weeks ago

• Nature’s Way
  

  I guess some people just can’t handle that others are actually liked around here and respected for their achievements in helping others.
  
  That respect has been earned not simply by length of service, number of replies, knowing this or knowing that… but by the real and clear effects of kindness and a sympathetic ear, sound advice and a willingness to help others “just because that’s what we do”.
  
  That’s not something that can be measured by “stats”. And aren’t we all “unvetted counsellors” on here?
  
  Some, at least, have common-sense and a heart.
  
  Might I suggest that instead of criticising fellow-helpers, some of you guys actually get out there and do some real helping? Thank you.
  - written 1 month, 3 weeks ago

• Just to let you know …
  

  Thanks! Will miss you all! x
  - written 1 month, 3 weeks ago

• I am not very rich .
  

  This is less about your friends’ circumstances as your own personal sense of inadequacy.
  
  Let go of that! We are all just as worthy as each other.
  
  My grandmother was a simple but feisty woman. One day, a neighbour rushed to her house wittering and fussing about what on earth to wear and what to say… she was going to London to meet the Queen at a parade! All torn up in knots about being from a mining family and this and that…the Queen was so important! What to do?
  
  My grandmother simply carried on stirring the soup and said “I’ll tell you what to do. If anyone looks down on you - remind yourself that they too sit on the toilet each morning and picture that! Even the Queen has to wipe her own….. ”
  
  The fact that these friends are happy to come to your place suggests you have something they don’t have at theirs…
  
  That something is unlikely to be material. It’s the “feel good factor” - now THAT’S priceless.
  - written 1 month, 3 weeks ago

• Do girls have sexual fantasies about their guy friends?
  

  What makes you think women are any different to men? … anatomically maybe. But their brains and hearts are in just the same place as yours!
  - written 1 month, 3 weeks ago

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