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chitownguy773
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- (1 vote) My boyfriend of three years has broke up with me and completely exiled me out of his life.
Halo,
I understand how you feel. You are not alone. I left my girlfriend 3 weeks ago. I caught her sending romantic messages to her ex boyfriend. Its been terrible. It sounds like you were in an abusive relationship. That was something you NEEDED to get out of. In many ways he is doing you a favor because in the long run, he was just going to hurt you worse. It may take some time to see it, because your feelings are over whelming your ability to think, but soon you will see it was for the best. He is clearly emotionally unstable and incapable of making you happy, and what you need to remember, and what is ABSOLUTELY the most important thing in your life, is happiness.
See it like this, right now you are taking one step back to take two steps forward. Depression is tough. Ive dealt with it my entire life, but every day things will get a little better. Youve been cut and the wound is fresh. You are going to feel extra sensitive to everything around you. In your mind you have just been attacked and your body is being flooded with stress hormones that are going to make you feel physically ill and sick to your stomach. Just understand this is all normal. Your mind and body are going into defense mode. You are going to go through all of the stages they describe. What they dont tell you is that all of the stages have a habit of happening at the same time. You may feel angry and sad at the same time. Everyone reacts differently.
You will cry. A lot. You may find yourself breaking down every few minutes. But thats ok. Like I said, biologically your mind is telling your body you just got attacked. And you did. Call friends. Call family. Talk to me. Talk to everyone. Talk about it as much as you can without annoying people. Let it out, even the little things. What I find happening is that the emotions and feelings have a tendency to pile on top of each other until they feel like they are crushing you. You can avoid that by just constantly communicating with people.
Most importantly give yourself time. You are going to need a lot of time and you need to really let that fact sink in. One odd thing they have noticed in many depressed individuals is whats called Psychomotor retardation. Which is a fancy way for saying you wont want to do a **** thing in the days and weeks to come. Working out is out of the question, making breakfast seems impossible, doing the laundry is impossible. Thats normal. Its been 3 weeks for me and I still struggle to put cereal in a bowl.
You need to actively relax. I watch movies. Try and put in as many comedies as possible. When the time comes get out and exercise. But most importantly, talk to people. Talk to me and everyone on this site (i dont sleep). Youre not alone.
- written 1 year, 4 months ago – voted for by Sara K