BlindOptimism's reply history at Help.com

That’s good. It’s a horrible feeling to go through life perhaps happy on the outside, but not on the inside. It’s good that you’ve filled that gap now :)

It’s difficult to say because we don’t know each other that well in the first place. I’ve become more apathetic and less silly (which could be attributed to maturity), more emotionally stable but also more judgemental. Less caring and less nice, so probably not many good changes! :p But my love for myself, as you are no doubt aware, just keeps increasing :p

Have you changed?

I know, it’s odd isn’t it. I’ve changed so much in such a short time as well.

Exactly! That’s the idea. But the whole world is BIG.

I re-read through the start of this thread the other day, to see how we started talking. It was interesting.

yeah, something like that, although i did only say *potential*

:p

That’s quite ambiguous due to the vagaries of my career. Publish a book would be one, release a CD (not an international CD, just a local one) of original piano music another. I always wanted to change the world too, but the older I get, the less likely it appears I’ll be able to :p At least two of those are feasible :P

Its far better that way though. A life without ambitions or desires is a boring, unfulfilling life

It’s only been two dates, don’t expect too much. Chill and just go with it. It’s not like you’re investing a large amount into her. Take it slow, don’t overwhelm her and what will be will be. Are you sure you even want to be with her anyway, seeing as you’re ready to cut her loose if she only wants to be friends?

Seeing Jim Carey was quite exciting. But other than that, a big plan. A massive crowd of people constantly pushing past you, as if being slightly in front of you is better than being slightly behind you, the inability to leave once the event is over. The nagging paranoia that at any moment a stampede could occur - yeah, it was alright :p

I’m sure you’ve seen some cool stuff. You’ve travelled too much to not see anything.

Yeah, Jim Carey turned the christmas lights on in London this year, which I went to see, but it was a big of a let-down. I’d never seen it in London before and thought they’d make a bit more of a spectacle about it, but it was pretty plain. And Carey’s microphone didn’t work :p

It’s not the sneakiness around her parents that stands out to me - although there is probably an element of excitement in the danger and rebellion, she may simply like you and know her parents won’t let anything happen, if there were to find out.

However, a life of sneaking around, going behind peoples backs, no matter how short-term, is never recommendable. After all - you should at least try to respect her parents wishes even if she doesn’t.

I wouldn’t say break up with her, but tell her that you don’t like the idea of sneaking around and see if there is a way you could resolve it in a way that makes everybody happy.

Alcohol tends to exacerbate the person who’s drinking it’s personality traits, rather than change them into something else. So, if they’re a sombre person, they’ll be more sombre. If they’re loud and excitably, get your earmuffs. If they have no problem lying, then that won’t change.

Depending on what your relating to, it tends to be the fact that they are thinking about the thing they’re lying/not lying about that is most important - because it shows it IS on their mind.

Obviously I don’t know you, but it sounds like you’re unfulfilled, rather than empty. This tends to leave feelings such as apathy towards things you don’t care about and things that don’t challenge you. You’ve already mentioned that you don’t feel this way when you mind can be absorbed in ‘fantasy’ worlds - and while it is quite possible that it is because you are away from your ‘normal’ life, it might also be that these are just the things you enjoy, so of course you’d feel happier during them.

Try and fill your life with things you enjoy doing, or by doing something practical and challenging (that you still feel able to do) like writing your own book, learning a musical instrument, or whatever. Those are just suggestions, but you really need to try and stop yourself feeling ‘bored’ with life and find a reason to get up in the morning. It’s just that those things that make life worthwhile are missing right now, for you.

The one thing that is true about girls is that they cannot be generalised. They all want different things. So don’t give up.

I got offered a freelance thing today. It’s only a one day thing and it’s unpaid, so it’s far from ideal, but it’ll get me a credit on IMDb which is a bit deal in movie terms, so at least it’s a start.

Also got two books on the go. One’s a fantasy novel - I already wrote it once when I was younger so know the ultimate story, but I was a really immature writer at the time, so am re-writing it to a better standard - and the other is a hopefully humourous collection of articles about life.

To be honest, none of that is particularly great or exciting news, but its a start :)

How are you?