SlightlyUnique's profile at Help.com

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SlightlyUnique's Top (5) Replies by other users' votes

• (1 vote) I love my boyfriend so much, but his feelings for me
  

  right - lets give this to you rather straight young lass…
  
  you can spend the next 6 months pining after this idiot, and in 6 months be exactly where you are now,
  
  or you can spend that time getting over him, and making sure in 6 months time you are ready to date again.
  
  Lets put it this way - you are in love - there is nothing like that first relationship, and he is milking it for everything - you CANNOT CHANGE HIM. IF he is to change, he will do it himself - and that won’t happen with a VERY unsubtle wake up call.
  
  I will be willing to bet that once you distance yourself from him, he will come running - because suddenly you aren’t there, and he will miss you, and he’s sorry, etc etc etc, until you pay an interest again, then he will do exactly as he is doing now.
  
  Ok. So he’s been hurt. Who fecking cares? - we’ve ALL been hurt! - GET OVER IT (thats to him, not you :P) - it DOES NOT give him a right to treat YOU like ****!
  
  Ultimately, what you do is your choice, but stop fecking throwing yourself at this wonderful bad boy, who you are so perfect for et cetera… if you were so perfect, you wouldn’t be having this problem! - you /may/ be perfect together, but he sure as hell isn’t ready for it!
  
  As said - Back off, tell him to tidy his own damned flat - wait for HIM to call you, and i’ll bet that he does.
  
  Then you can either give him another go (and if you are like most lasses on there first love, another go, and another, and another…) and see what happens
  
  or, my advice - give him ONE more go, and if its not a solid change, walk for life - and TELL HIM THIS IN ADVANCE
  
  Frankly, this annoys me more than it should, but i spent a lot of my young life looking for lovely lasses to spend time with, and most were doing EXACTLY what you are here - there are FAR better, and much more compatible men out there - trust me on this.
  
  Alls said and done - its your life - and making a mistake isn’t stupid. Failing to learn by it is.
  
  Good luck, in whatever you choose :)
  
  - written 2 months ago – voted for by ATearFromHeaven

• (1 vote) My laptop screen stopped working.
  

  [quote dllewis]Finally was able to start it in safe mode. However, I cannot get it to connect to the internet to be able to check for drivers.[/quote]
  
  did it boot correctly, and you can see the screen then? :)
  
  if so, do this
  
  [quote callum.t-po]select safe mode with networking (safemod dissables things that dont have to be run and the internet is dissabled) but if you boot in to safe mode with networking it should work[/quote]
  
  - written 2 months, 1 week ago – voted for by callum.t-po

• (1 vote) What would you do if YOu were bullied because you were gay?
  

  Actually - there is only one real way
  
  Make it so it is not worth their time to bully you
  
  The way you do this is dependant on the way you are being bullied
  
  Personally, i found it was to stand up, and fight back, with EVERYTHING you have - not half hearted - make it so each punch they land on you means they lose blood too, and keep fighting no matter what - they will go after softer targets that way
  
  if verbal bullying, attack them back - if they call you fat, call them fatter, if they call you geek, tell them its better to be a geek then thick as ****
  
  ultimately, you fight, and you fight with everything you have - you will never /cure/ a bully, but they tend to be cowards, and they gang together (how many bullies are there that bully on their own?)
  
  You may need freinds of your own to support you
  
  Its not easy - because to do this you put EVERYTHING on the line - to back down is to lose - and losing is unacceptable
  
  But it DOES work - everyone i’ve ever known that stopped being bullied did it this way, including me
  
  The others… simply… survived
  
  The ones that fought… Won :)
  
  
  
  Telling teachers/parents is a start, but will never stop bullying - it will give you a safe haven though
  
  - written 6 months, 3 weeks ago – voted for by Time Traveller

• (1 vote) I seriously don’t know why I’m doing this, I feel kind of stupid doing it actually - but no one will listen.
  

  “I wish someone would just save me and I wouldn’t have to put any effort into my life. But yeah, I wish for a lot of things and no one gives me reason to believe that my life is going to get any better. So yeah, what’s a stupid website going to “help” with?”
  
  Not our place youngling - its your life, and you can do with it what you want.
  
  A old line says “God helps those who help themselves” - Frankly, I don’t care wether you believe in god or not, but at the moment, what are you doing? Wasting the hours til you can go home again, wasting the days, months and years, for what? So some mythical creature can spirty you away, wave a magic wand and sort out your problems? - Well hon - You won’t like the result if you follow this path.
  
  Lets look at what you’ve said…
  
  Parents split up - but you’re ok with that
  
  Moved School - there are worse things to happen - yes, its a fear, but aren’t fears meant to be conquered? Its not like you’ve been thrown out of your house with no money, or you’ve just been gangraped, and tortured is it?
  
  You want to sit exams and do another year at school - So this is going to happen HOW exactly when you don’t go to school anyway?
  
  You reap what you sow. And currently all you’re going to get to eat is dirt, since you aren’t sowing anything, but fear, and probably a lot of heartache.
  
  You’ve written this well, which tells me you aren’t thick. It has a certain vision there, which says you actually have thought, probably more than you’ve written here - but, you have hit this wall of fear, - and almost stupidity - although the truism says “Making a mistake isn’t stupid - failing to learn by it is”
  
  So - are you being stupid? - thats up to you to decide.
  
  As for help - help yourself, and stop being a idiot
  
  Personally, i would recommend sowing seeds for a bright, happy life - but again, this is up to you.
  
  Frankly, I don’t much care personally what you do - You have the choice of being a bright, happy lass, with a brain, with money, and that can SEE, or yet another wastral sat in a hoody on a street corner - and there are so many of them, who will notice one more?
  
  Good luck with whatever you choose - but this choice is YOURS - no one elses, and also no-one elses fault.
  
  - written 8 months ago – voted for by Jules22871

• (1 vote) im tryin really hard 2 get over my first love..
  

  Hmmm - thats happened to me… its not fun is it!
  
  Took me about 1 year to operate roughly normally, and another 3/4 years afterwards to properly forgive, and move on :P - its a SLOW process, but you get there :)
  
  Live life for yourself - look for what makes YOU happy, away from him - take up new hobbies, make new friends - go places that DO NOT remind you of her, and for the love of god, stay away from his house, you can spend hours pining away just hoping for a glimpse of him - and believe me, it doesn’t help! :P
  
  - written 8 months, 1 week ago – voted for by Callie_17

Last 5 Replies – All 1,055 replies »

• What is your help.com expertise?
  

  I’m the accountant, computer teccy, and the devils advocate :)
  
  Although, you can ask me this - why post a question like this as anon?
  - written 1 day, 23 hours ago

• My boyfriend and I were together, things were going strong and felt amazing for 4 months.
  

  oh, compeltely true - i’ve seen rebounds that have created really good relationships
  
  but, the difference is, a rebound is one where you take the first available vaguely compatible woman (sometimes not even that :P), because it beats being single
  
  where as normally you take a woman that is in some way compatible with you - by your choice, because you think you can make it work…
  - written 2 days, 23 hours ago

• My boyfriend and I were together, things were going strong and felt amazing for 4 months.
  

  then, /talk/ with him!
  
  if you are going to be together, be together!
  
  Although, from what you just said, i’m leaning towards lunuxya being right…
  
  Make sure you remember this one thing - “one person does not a relationship make”
  
  if he’s not meeting you half way, then no matter how perfect you might be, you obviously aren’t
  
  good luck :)
  - written 3 days ago

• My boyfriend and I were together, things were going strong and felt amazing for 4 months.
  

  for the fantastic feeling that love is, there must be the bad side too it that you see now :P
  
  if you want him, then /talk/ to him! - /Every/ good relationship that exists has solid communication at its core - do you think a good relationship is constantly wonderful, with no bad patches, and without needing to bite the bullet and talk about unpleasent things from time to time?
  - written 3 days, 1 hour ago

• My boyfriend and I were together, things were going strong and felt amazing for 4 months.
  

  sounds like he’s suffering from first love syndrome - he’s being hit by emotions and feelings which he can’t control, and its completely fecked up his centre - (this happened to me once, long ago - its not fun)
  
  Unfortunately, as a cure, there isn’t one - you have a choice
  
  1) - Leave. Do what partlythere said, and get on with your life - he has no right to treat you like this
  
  Or…
  
  2) - Talk to him, get him to open up, and talk to you, in detail - if you are going to go through this, you really aught to do it /together/ - its possible he might get over it in his own time, but, if he wants you to wait, then he aught to be sharing - if he’s expecting you to wait, and not being there… - see choice 1, above :P
  
  Ultimately, if this was reversed, what would you do?
  - written 3 days, 1 hour ago

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