Yeah, I haven’t been here in a long time, but I miss it so I’m trying to come back. Vegas was so fun last year and I want to go back! I’m doing really good! I’m engaged and getting married in a few months :)
Hey, that is great, i am really pleased for you.
Good luck for all the traveling your going to be doing :)
It is now 30 days til i go.
I know it will work well when i get there.
Good on you!
:-) are funny and really not old.
I keep rememebering that advice, it is so hard at the moment but I am trying, trying reakky hard to keep looking forward and not dwell on the past. Its down to moments of sadness just now which is good.
Thanks for the great words and have a wonderful birthday.
X
:-) are funny and really not old.
I keep rememebering that advice, it is so hard at the moment but I am trying, trying reakky hard to keep looking forward and not dwell on the past. Its down to moments of sadness just now which is good.
Thanks for the great words and have a wonderful birthday.
X
hehe - i still feel young too - although the bald spot is starting to grow! - as is the paunch :P
and remember this my darling sponge
“When one door closes, another opens - but we often look so long and regretfully at the shut door, we miss the new possibilites that await”
We /HAVE/ to experiance the crap, so we can appreicate the good - unless you plan on doing like me - i am going Zen like - i don’t get happy over much, but conversly, not much upsets me either…
personally, i wouldn’t recommend it! - its hard work falling in love when you shut down most of your emotions :P
be true to yourself, and thats all that matters :) - sing with your heart and soul, and cheer for those that earn your freindship, wether they live, die, stay close, move away, or skip happilly in a world of their own - for if they have earnt your love, is there any point in withdrawing it?
wow! i’m going into zen like mysterious old man mode now!
i had better run :P
Keep smiling Victoria Sponge - and keep a twinkle in your eye
HAPPY BIRTHDAY, HAPPY BIRTHDAY,HAPPY BIRTHDAY Oh I was just talkinfg this morning to someone how I want to have e kids party for my 30th, jelly and ice cream bouncy castle, party food all that, not that its even my 30th for a few years but loved the idea so much, I bet it will fly by anyway, the last 4 have, I still feel 21.
I have a friend leaveing do and thats about it, seems all I am doing lately is saying goodbye, oh well thats life, or so I’m told. Oh I have to stop sounding so miserable I’m not really :) Just had a tough few weeks, oh there I go again . Woops :)
Well, it was one of those posts that you keep wondering about…did we help or not? Glad to be able to give it a try, though.
I hope you had a very fun weekend.
I tell you what one of the only times we really feel out was when I discovered he is scared of spiders too :-D He was trying to do the manly leave it there it wont harm you thing and I went on and on about it till he had to admit he was scared. What will the pair of us do!!!
Oooooohhhhh
Stop it stop it. I’m trying to put it all to the back of my mind, they don’t hunt men but they are mega big huge evil hairy looking spiders, shudders shudders
Heheheh
Now that is a bad memory, this morning you mentioned you wanted to punch out an idiot work collegue :)
I am so scared I hate spiders and scorpions I cannot even look at a picture of them without wanting to scream and someone told me that the hunts man spiders hunt in 2’s!!!!!!!!! Every time I say that to someone I feel a shudder down my spine
Hehehe
My memory is awful, I have decided to leave the “so called” friends in the past they are more hassle than they are worth and they just take advantage of my kindness I think. Me and the bf are moving to Australia for a year, see the world a bit rather than sit through the recession all all is good in my world. Hows things with your old work collegues?
Oh you will have to forgive me I confuse easily and my memory is rubbish, who was I going to bitchslap to death? Was it my evil friends post or have I commented on another post? You will have to refresh my memory a little and it will all come flooding back.
I guess my not even remembering means that things are fixed whatever it is I was stressin about, thats my problem I stress and stress then my mood goes up and I forget what I was even stressed about in the first plance :-D
Balance exists in extremes?! Are you TRYING to totally confuse me? I feel that headache coming on:} It’s like I’m the Karate Kid to your Miagi. Talk about a mind flip! I’m gonna go digest.:)
Hehe! Saw that one coming. Taken a step further, how do you know I’m not lying about being a pathological liar?^^:P(insert evil cackle here)
If it’s all about balance, then I really am in trouble. I’m ALL about extremes. I couldn’t find the middle-ground if my life depended on it. Which I guess it kinda does:/
I don’t get the 22 catch thing. And how do I find strength in weakness?
Oh! BTW, You caught me. Avoiding hard questions is what I do. Colour me bashful. Anyway, if you really want a list, you’ll have to be patient, cos I so don’t feel up to it today. That cool?
ID’d at 28? Wanna switch problems? I’m 24, and I’ve never been carded in my life. Once I was hanging out with my brother’s 20yr old girlfriend and a guy mistook me for her mother! That would entail an immaculate conception at 3 years old, for Pete’s sake. Sorry, went a little insane there. I’m clearly not over the trauma:D
Change the world, huh? You sound like my brother. You both make it sound so easy. It feels anything but, though.
An easier question would be: what’s not wrong with me? Being Borderline pretty much sums up the brunt of it. Any repugnant personality trait you can think of, I probably have it. My brother’s constantly accusing me of being the worst kind of selfish. My dad’s always telling me to grow up ( I may have an old soul, but apparently I also have a puerile mind to go with it). Since my moods are so unstable, I can be really difficult to be around. Most people really love me for like the first month or two that they know me, and then they bail. Wish I could bail too. Unfortunately I’m stuck here.
Interesting defense mechanism. I guess it would be rather disarming to be around a person who ALWAYS told the truth. That’s out for me though since I’m a compulsive liar. It’s pathological, it really is.
Finally, what’s stopping me from pulling myself together? My inescapable and intrinsic me-ness. To me, the word ‘impossible’ has VERY real meaning. I guess it’s what you might call a catch-22 situation. Ever read that book, by the way?
You’re funny:D Hold out for 3, huh? I dropped out cos of my mental issues. When things start getting intense I tend to hide out and party for a while, and then I have a
breakdown and have to be institutionalized. The medical aid’s run out cos it’s a really crappy plan and I spent Christmas through Feb in hospital, both physiological and mental. I self-medicate with alcohol ( have done since I was 17) and then do things I wouldn’t normally do sober. I know logically I shouldn’t, but I get desperate, and without my meds it’s the only escape I can get from myself. I’ve discovered first-hand that my sorrows can swim, but only when I’m sober. So I try not to be. It’s not the best plan, but it’s all I got right now.
What do I wanna be? I used to have alotta dreams: award-winning journalist, author, Broadway super-star. Right now, all I wanna be is anyone but me.
The dissembling thing? That’s mostly me hiding from me, more than than the people I lie to. I just have a hard time facing the person I am. BTW, you said you have a fun defense mechanism? What is it?
Who told me I’m an old soul? Almost everyone who spends enough time with me. First my parents, cos at 10 I was listening to Nat King Cole instead of Aqua, and was a published poet at 15. I think that’s when I peaked, unfortunately. Other people say I have really youthful skin, but still look 10 years older than my age. Because of my old soul, they say. Old men were asking me if I was married when I was 14. I don’t know, it’s bizarre.
I don’t literally want to blow my brains out. I figure pills are more tasteful:) Seriously, though, I’ve already had my stomach pumped twice. I wouldn’t recommend the experience. Since I don’t believe in life after death, I guess the only thing stopping me now is cowardice, and a misguided hope that I might be able to pull myself together before it’s too late, so all the pain and torment I’ve already experienced won’t have been for nothing, ya know?
*chuckles* - if i thought that way, i wouldn’t be me!
Lets see… Just keeping things short (ask questions! talk to me for more detail - i don’t want to bore you rabbiting on about things that you know/don’t care about/ are irrelevant!
First, i would ask why you dropped out?
Second, I would ask why your medical aid has run out?
Third, i would ask why you drink into a stupor, and make out with any guy that buys you a drink?
As for thoughts
- What do you want to be - what do you see your potential as?
- The mind is a fantastic thing… I am lucky to only get only minor mental disorders (such as dyslexia) which are possible to work around - but i DO know, that for each flaw, there is a gem somewhere - and its a matter of not focusing on your weakness’s, its a matter of focusing on your strengths… - here is a good moment to tell me what they are!
- A old adage for you “Should you try to drown your sorrows, remember that your sorrows can swim”
- Making out with any guy that buys you a drink? - most commonly done to boost self esteem - which i have to comment is a waste :P - hold out for 2 at least! (and when you can get that consistantly, hold out for 3! :D - everyone needs a boost of some description (I just refer to myself as fantastic all the time - it works for me! :P) is there another reason? - and what do they have to do to get in your pants? Its quite funny really, since if they are buying you drinks, you must be not bad looking at all! :P
- Lets see… mastering the arts of hiding yourself… never a bad thing - we all need a defense mechanism :) mines quite fun! :P - ultimately, its fine - but you also need to know when to lets someone in, and BE HONEST with them - although finding someone that you can is rare now-adays - but there are the honorable people still out there!
- care to tell me about the fakeness? :)
- why do you want to blow your brains out
- and who told you, and why, that you are a old soul :)
K, you asked for it. Well, unfortunately I happen to BE one of your dreaded “wasted potential” people. I’m a two-time varsity drop-out with Borderline Personality Disorder and comorbid Bipolar. My medical aids’s run out, so I can no longer afford therapy or my meds, and thus find myself spending more and more time in bed. When I’m not doing that, I’m drinking myself into a stupor at various clubs and pubs and making out with any guy who’ll buy me a drink. Nobody I’ve met in the last year and a half has a clue what a mess I really am, since I have mastered the fine art of subterfuge and dissembling. Otherwise known as talking out of one’s ass. Fake name, fake job, fake friends, fake life. Sometimes I even manage to convince myself, and so make it through another day without blowing my brains out. Thinking “can of worms”, “Pandora’s box”, “get me out!” yet? Wouldn’t blame ya.
I thought that might be the case. You’re a far better person than I. I tend to come from a more needy than giving place. I guess I don’t really think I have that much to give right now; too much obscuring baggage, you know?:)
Hi SU. Good to hear from you. What brings me here? Same as everyone else, I guess. Over-burdened with issues and looking for a sympathetic ear or two and maybe the occasional friend. Although, you seem to be more interested in helping than being helped. Intriguing. Would like to know more.
Hi! Dig your profile. I’ve also been called an old soul on a number of occasions. And weird:) Do you also love music, architecture, fashion, and just about everything else that was popular several decades before your birth? Would like to be friends. Give me a shout.
Oooo Taunton, as in Devon? Been reading your profile, lofve it down there had some friends living in Taunton not been since they moved away. Anyway guess what, my bf is going for the interview, he isn’t overly happy about it but I think I got my point across by saying it in a jokey way but he knew the meaning behind the joke, do you know what I mean? I hope that made sense, I am so pleased he seemed to be trying a lot harder last night and this morning he seemed in bright spirits again. Woo Hoo, thank you for your help yesterday
hi there! I just wanted to thank you for your prayers and well wishes for me. This really has meant alot to me. I feel so blessed to be on this site with you and all the other kind souls here. Again thank you soooo much xoxox seas….