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papillon.belle's Top (1) Replies by other users' votes

• (1 vote) —-
  

  Sweetheart you need some confidence in yourself. There’s always something good. You need to surround yourself with happiness. Whatever make you happy that’s not self destructive or harmful do it! Get a hobby, read a good book, get out there a meet new people. You are strong and independent and certainly DO NOT need a man or anyone else to make you who you are! I know sometimes that it feels like no one will ever stick around or just be there but trust me hun if you stick it out your going to find a man who is amazing and makes you feel like your on the top of the world and you’ll get in with some good friends who will be there to lift you up and be there for you through whatever. Most importantly you need to know that you don’t have to have those friends or that relationship to create your own happiness. That’s on you!!! If this situation gets to the point where you feel depressed enough to want to revert to being reclusive, committing suicide, or hurting someone else you need to go see a counselor. Don’t be afraid of having a trained professional there to listen and help and if it comes to it and your counselor believes that it would fit well with you get on anti-depressants, depending on your age do the right amount of research and self examinations before you go that route because prescriptions don’t always make things better.
  You are a beautiful person with a beautiful soul!!!!! Tell yourself that EVERY day!! If you want to I suggest at the moment you start a diary if your feel down write all those things down that you feel bad about yourself or that you want to change and burn it!!! literally, you’d be surprised the release and dedication it can give you.
  There’s always hope sweetheart hang in there!
  
  - written 4 years, 9 months ago – voted for by Dragon_Lady

Last 5 Replies – All 5 replies »

• Help, I need money!
  

  Money can be one of the number one stresses in leading an independent life. Know that there are amazing paying jobs out there and if you feel like you aren’t making enough money to cover basic bills look for a different job, and maybe not even something that’s going to pay off right now but something that offers insurance and possibilities for advancement. Know that there is always help out there if you are in the United States like Catholic Charities and Housing Authority help. Don’t overspend and keep yourself on a strict budget! If worse comes to worse move in with a family member or friend until you can get back up on your feet and feel that you can live comfortably without having to be panicked about money all the time.
  - written 4 years, 9 months ago

• My boyfriend and I have been dating for 5 years.
  

  Sounds like he’s having a little harder time putting his whole heart back into the relationship and that’s okay, when your hurt and when you break up with someone and start thinking about ever being with someone else it’s very very emotionally draining and sometimes you start to guard your heart a little bit more closely. It sounds like you are not having trouble jumping right back into the way things used to be but he may still be a little timid. What I would suggest is to try getting back into the type of “new” relationship. Be a little cautious and always notice what your doing. Try to build him up and be slightly immature and flirty just like you would if you had just started dating. Try to get him to see that spark that started your wonderful relationship. Try this for a few weeks and if he continues to closed off and distant confront him with it in a non-obtrusive or dominating way and try to find out the source of him confliction. :( I hope things get better!
  - written 4 years, 9 months ago

• —-
  

  Sweetheart you need some confidence in yourself. There’s always something good. You need to surround yourself with happiness. Whatever make you happy that’s not self destructive or harmful do it! Get a hobby, read a good book, get out there a meet new people. You are strong and independent and certainly DO NOT need a man or anyone else to make you who you are! I know sometimes that it feels like no one will ever stick around or just be there but trust me hun if you stick it out your going to find a man who is amazing and makes you feel like your on the top of the world and you’ll get in with some good friends who will be there to lift you up and be there for you through whatever. Most importantly you need to know that you don’t have to have those friends or that relationship to create your own happiness. That’s on you!!! If this situation gets to the point where you feel depressed enough to want to revert to being reclusive, committing suicide, or hurting someone else you need to go see a counselor. Don’t be afraid of having a trained professional there to listen and help and if it comes to it and your counselor believes that it would fit well with you get on anti-depressants, depending on your age do the right amount of research and self examinations before you go that route because prescriptions don’t always make things better.
  You are a beautiful person with a beautiful soul!!!!! Tell yourself that EVERY day!! If you want to I suggest at the moment you start a diary if your feel down write all those things down that you feel bad about yourself or that you want to change and burn it!!! literally, you’d be surprised the release and dedication it can give you.
  There’s always hope sweetheart hang in there!
  - written 4 years, 9 months ago

• Still trying to figure out this argument I had with my long-distance girlfriend.
  

  Although long distance relationships are hard mostly for this reason there are things that you can do and it is still healthy to have an argument here or there. I was in a long distance relationship for about a year and what helped us more than anything was to get web cams! It gave us a chance to see each other in person and how the other reacted. It’s NEVER a good idea to argue over text IM or e-mail it is not healthy and not how our psyche as humans works because we can never understand the meaning behind what the other person says. We are very much visual creatures in the fact that we pick so much up from our partners body movements and the looks on their reactions. It would have helped as you said to have talked to her over the phone because of the inflection and tone. The other concern that I have is that you worry that the reason she didn’t want to talk to you on the phone is because she was afraid she would “loose” the argument. I think either you need to speak with her about being strong enough to express what she needs to you in a non-internet way (either on the phone or through a webcam conversation) without just giving in. That’s not very healthy in itself.
  All I can say is hang in there and get in some good conversation between the two of you get on the same level and work on those things that your struggling with!
  - written 4 years, 9 months ago

• I have a friend, who needs help,
  

  I think that the best thing to do in a situation like this is try to get her out of it. If that means sending her to live with a friend for a couple of months or if that means taking bigger action to get her removed from a situation. A person cannot come home, to a place that is supposed to a supportive and positive and to people who are supposed to love and feel put down and rejected. I’m not sure of the degree of the problem but if it is small and something her parents are doing that they haven’t always done maybe have her start by talking to them and telling them how they make her feel. If it is true emotional abuse let her know that there are always other options and that she’s worth so much more than that! Above all if it is a serious case of emotional abuse, get her OUT of the situation before she goes off the deep end. Emotional abuse can be the worst and it will eat away a person until they have nothing left! I hope she gets some help and thanks for being a good and caring friend, we need more friends like you in the world!
  - written 4 years, 9 months ago

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