k_ay_li's profile at Help.com

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Last 2 Posts Authored

• Anyone here good enough at piano to teach it? posted (11 months, 1 week) ago
  I have questions~ So I was wondering if I should invest in a piano teacher. I have been practicing…

• I’m really concerned about talking to an old friend of mine. posted (11 months, 4 weeks) ago
  We haven’t spoken for almost eight years. But we were close as hell. I feel like I still know…

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k_ay_li's Top (1) Replies by other users' votes

• (1 vote) I hate how I look.
  

  I just finished writting a reply to anotehr girl who thought she was over weight. Its a common thing it seems.I will tell you the same thing I told her. “Don’t obsess over this”. You are young and are capable of so much!
  
  I want you to realize that you are making a big mistake by doing what all teenage girls do and that is “compare”. Your not seeing you as an individual. Im sure your are a beautiful young woman who is more then just a size 7 (which is not over weight at all). If you can just look past that. Its just weight, its just a shape and a number. You’d be surprised what some girls might envy YOU for. This paranoia is hard to deal with I know. And sometimes it seems like no one understand and they are just being a comfort to you.
  
  Just remember you don’t need anyone eles approval besides your own, so start with that and fixate on good qualities and positive thinking. Usually no one thinks that accept you. To me there is “fat” and then there is “thin”. There is no where between and to the norm thats the way the it works. As humans we come in all shapes and sizes, thats what makes us “us”. Its highschool, and I know the pressure is there but youll find that things change as you get older and you start to appriciate other things. You just need to focus your attention on maybe what you find you like about yourself.
  
  - written 11 months, 4 weeks ago – voted for by Sans

Last 5 Replies – All 18 replies »

• Why does life have to be so hard?
  

  If it were easy, would it be worth living?
  - written 11 months, 1 week ago

• I used to think this site was great.
  

  [quote Cecilia]Ok. Some of you guys got me slightly wrong. K_ay_li, I never said others haven’t helped me. They have. My problem was that I thought that there help would be enough. And that’s naive to think. Equally, you get hooked on helping others and them helping you. And you put help.com on a sort of pedestal. I know I did. What my main point was that I had not helped other people… (above)[/quote]
  
  I was very mislead with the first post. I’m sorry to have judged you and categorized as such. You seem a very intelligent and giving person from what I just read. It makes me happy to know that there is people like you willing to give and devote so much time into helping others both in this site and outside.
  
  I also took place in a food drive about a year ago and yes, I felt so rewarded to do what I could for the needy. Its a good feeling, and I enjoy maybe having the chance to help other people. I know what you are trying to reveal now to the people on this site. To do something worth while in the “real world” and make a lasting impression on society. It would be a grand place if we all could do that. I think your advice some people should take for themselves (such as myself, recently new member)and apply it to living. I am not doing anything right now, I could be going house to house asking for canned goods like I use to. Organizing food drives and inspiring people to do the same. Its good advice and that is a knowledge gained with maturity.
  
  But I think what you don’t realize (perhaps) is that everyday, on this site, real or not real, we offer a reassurance of being completely anonymous and helping those who have no where to turn but this site. Some people cant do the the things me and you do and that is go out and help people. Have food drives, collect for good will etc. This site is more based on psychological needs and quick questioning. It shouldn’t be looked down upon or thought less of just because it isn’t tangible. Words can be very strong things if you let them work their magic. One word could mean a million things haha. Don’t disregard this method as less helpful, it can truly do so much if used properly. It is exceptionally more personal too, much more then any fund raiser or charity (not saying that those things arnt good).
  
  Every type of help should not be judge on its method, but simply its means to relieve a person of pain or suffering.
  
  But Cecilia you are very right in your way of saying that it sometimes is more then words you need. Sometimes you have to stand up and do things with your hands physically instead of hiding behind a computer all day and pretend to be “I know it all and I have all the answers, I will help you, do this”. Half the time the advice is not even noticed or taken action in because of fear and paranoia. You are more likely to get results by taking part in your community. But please don’t say that it isn’t as good as another way of helping. Any help should be appreciated. (i may have sent this twice, i am sorry if i have)
  - written 11 months, 3 weeks ago

• Do you need to go to Uni to be a script writer?
  

  Well maybe you can start by asking yourself, if you truly want to go to university or if you are just doing it because your friend is. Its a good place to start out, its sets any foundation for a hard working life and it allows you to network ideas and later in life, the people you know may give you a helping hand.
  
  If your beginning to think and question if its really right for you I would look into the program. Go with your friend down to the university (if you can of course) and ask to sit in one of the classes. It might give you a better idea of what your getting yourself into because you seem a bit unsure right now.
  
  If your seriously unsure and having countless second thoughts, maybe you just need to re-adjust yourself. You don’t need to go to university NOW. there’s plenty of time to go at a later date. Its not “university or no university”. Don’t stress yourself too much. Try to think of when you would like to go, what it will do for you. But don’t go if you arn’t completely sure what the course offers. It may be very helpful with your writing, you never know.
  
  You seem to know what you want, this is incredibly to your advantage, so don’t let it pass you by. If you can see yourself having all these things in university then go for it. Ask yourself what you plan to do outside of school if you don’t go and then make your choice.
  - written 11 months, 3 weeks ago

• Do you need to go to Uni to be a script writer?
  

  There are many well educated people who advise you to have a secondary education for this type of work. But this education isn’t even guaranteed to find you that specific job you desire. Think of it as a extra stepping stone you would not have if you didn’t go to uni or col.
  
  You may just get your foot in the door with these types of classes and a title on your resume and with this it will help exceptionally. NO education is wasted. You can only gain from going to university. although if your second guessing yourself because of money, i can completely understand. Sinking money into something like that is a big choice to be made. But if you don’t go you may regret it.
  
  But with that said, you are perfectly capable of doing things on your own and being self-reliant on your dream. Most script writers did not even go to university or college, even some great directors. I’m sure with even not going and sinking that much money, you can be just as great a writer. I’m sure you know this already but there is alot of great books and series of novels about this field. Especially the formats and set up of things (its more difficult then I thought). Just don’t give up and keep practicing your craft.
  
  
  I was interested in the same field of work (directing/screen writing/story boarding), and I have an idea of how expensive it is. Don’t base your complete decision what someone is truly telling you to do. You can only be happy if you pick for yourself. Just remember what ever you pick, it will be okay. With learning comes experience and with self promotion comes experience. Both are good paths to choose although I do believe one is more rockier then the other. Only because you may have educate yourself and push a bit harder. Other then that, I wish you luck and I look forward to seeing your stuff on the screen/play.
  - written 11 months, 3 weeks ago

• I used to think this site was great.
  

  That’s because no one can do the job of “better ones self”. Its something we usually learn through experience and you obviously are aware of it. You are a very smart person for noticing this. But to think this site useless or pointless is a bit ignorant in itself.
  
  A helping hand is never ever wasted. Neither is the push in the right direction. This is part of the process of realization which everyone comes here to undergo. It’s seems to me you are discouraged that the advice you received wasn’t a “Fix my fast” type of response and only gave you a few short moments of relief. In those moments, people expect you to want to change or take charge of your problem. As people from help.com, we don’t expect our answers to be a magical cure that will forever change peoples lives for the better. Only one person is capable (as you said) and with comforting words, you may be strong enough to move forward.
  
  Because you are uncomfortable with leaving your laptop into “the real world”. It may be a complex much more then help.com but just your obsession with the computer (I use to use it as a way to escape as well). Don’t ever be discouraged with what people try to do for you. That seems a bit selfish and unappreciative .
  
  I’m not here to say your wrong, I’m saying your actually very very correct. Everything you said above is true. No one can get inside you and steer you into “finding a job”, “breaking up with a boyfriend” “becoming more social” etc. These are all real life problems which need to be handled by the person in charge of his or her own life. But never bite the hand that feeds, we are only here to help/provide advice, it doesn’t promise anywhere on this site that we are like a magic pill that can be taken at night and your fears will magically disappear. You seem to know this, but what you typed above is naive to think that it is a big endless circle of hugs and kisses. We can’t come out of the screen and do these things for you, no, of coures not. But we can always offer advice which is the best we can do from where we are sitting. Please look at two sides of the coin.
  
  I hope you trust you own instincts though and remember that no matter what I or anyone else says, listen to yourself and try to be positive. If you truly feel this strongly and wish to leave and you think that it will only do good for you, then I support you. I think that maybe it would be wise to get off the computer and see the world around you, it might be good for you. I hope you find what truly makes you happy and if help.com doesn’t help or outlet your pain in any way try another means. Talking to friends or family. You could even phone people and talk to them. Don’t worry, there is always other ways.
  - written 11 months, 3 weeks ago

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