Hello users,Im Sandy's shoutbox - Help.com

=D

Yea..here I am again! =O

Came back home from watching a boxing match, its 2am.
It was good.

As of how am I feeling?…well…sad actually. Remember the girl I told you about? well, she has no cel phone and decided to move out of her moms house (too much stress there) and leave to an apartment she rented, the kids are w/their dad in Alaska (they left last friday) and will be there until she settles better.
I dont know where exactly it is she moved but she did tell me she was moving out some time ago though.
Im sad bc she said she needed some time for herself bc she noticed she was falling too hard for me and I wasnt responding back the same way, she told me she needed to try and calm down those feelings she has for me somehow. With distance.
I told her that I wouldnt like it but that I respected her decision, I wont pressure her.
Today is 2 days I know nothing of her except she’s working (weekends long hours late shifts) and secondly, we have not spoken on phone.

She also said that she was doing this to see if I developed or had deeper feelings for her.

Im all sad and crap (I hate this feeling) =P
I do know I care for her, she is important to me and that I enjoy her company (she knows this).
I wanted to bring her to see the boxing match and yesterday hang out w/her but she was already “gone”.

What can I do?

Nothing but keep moving.

I know that.

It just sucks to have a heart sometimes.

Im glad to hear from you sandy and I would have gladly accepted the invitation of hangin’ out w/y’all. Who knows…maybe you are much sweeter in person.

=D

Work is good. Boring, but good…Im 31 now as of the 4th of november. So respect your elders.
=O
and damn does that sound to me old! hahaha

I like what you said in your previous shout. Denotes your intelligence. I took it into consideration.

How have you been doing?
Your dog ok?

Let me know…I’ll try and catch up more frequently. I enjoy reading your advice.

But remember, I dont only vent, I can listen too y’know?

Thank you Sandy, and take care.

P.S: Dont tell me you lost something at the “girls night out”!
lol

-joey.

=)

hey..

yea…been a bit busy as you may have noticed.

I just read that your last shout was 3 weeks ago and you did it twice (responded twice without me being on help).
Thats very considerate of you sandy.

I did tell you i met someone last time, idk though…she’s like way more into me than me into her. Im kinda not into it that much anymore, maybe its because she likes me a lil too much, maybe its bc of the fact that she cant have more kids (yea…she has 3 beautiful ones already) and I would love to have at least one of my own…always wanted. Im trying to figure it out for now.
Maybe bc shes different from what I expected initially.

Tonite I feel like crap bc I feel i hurt her out of some stupid reaction I had on a drive in at McD’s…she was taking too much time and was indecisive on what she was ordering, and didnt know the name of what her sister wanted either and there was a line of cars that started to gather behind us so I slightly started to slip (get desperate once she started to say she wanted “that” and I was: “what?” she’ kept saying “that” and “that” and I was “what is it you are saying??”)
eh…my attitude wasnt the best at that moment.

=O

Yea..compared to me Im getting to see that eventhough she might be younger, she has lived way more than I have (emotionally and physically too). She’s super good to me. Sometimes i believe shes too good to be true in that aspect, as if she likes me bc Ive been this “good guy” all my life and I have no kids, single, work, a place, a car that runs, and am not bad looking. Idk…she was weird all night after that McD’s thing, I felt she closed up from that point so I left.

Idk..

I feel like Im becoming some guy I dont feel i am, and I dont like it. What guy? A “settle’r” maybe? My mind and heart are not in an agreement. And I think thats messin’ me up.

Fack.

Another thing is, Im tired of being thought as an “ex” some chic had, as if I were to be the same as “he” was.
Tired.

I just got home and vented with this shout.

I’ll stay as I am right now, I wont call her. Give her space, and me as well.

I hope you are doing OK. Kinda “ballsy” me coming out of nowhere and venting out some “issue” Im having.
=D

How about you? how have you been?
How is the dog?

i cannot guarantee I’ll be loggin in frequently anymore, between my job and daily crap, things are changin a bit ‘timewise’. So time for you to start callin’.
=P

Take care Sandy.

Thank you.

Again, thank you.

Well, I’d like to find out if possible.

I tried that, and a few forums. But it’s a rather old game, and unpopular in comparison to others.

Yes… I’ve been unable to install that game for something like months, and would like to hear from someone who managed to how they did it. But there aren’t that many around…
But if it bothers you, I’ll leave it be.

Oriental, huh…
Ah, old habits sure are hard to break.

Have you been able to contact your ‘niece’?

Hello again.

Thank you. Isn’t it enough just to ask if she knows the name?
Mm, I see. My sister is 15 too, but my parents don’t call her my daughter. :P
Well, it has by 1 user! Which is grand already. But you’re right, people are leaving. Not very fast though, even when they say they do, they often return afterwards. Can’t blame them though, y’know.
It has grown troll-wise, that’s for sure. It’s also harder to tell since the avatar-changing system broke down.
Why’d you come back, if you don’t mind me asking?

aha well I’ll be sure to send her the pictures. and honostly aha I dont know much about anime. She’s 15. She’s actually my cousin but her parents have always perferred me to call her my niece so it just kind of stuck. Hmm I haven’t noticed, has help.com grown? User-wise?
And I’m back aha for a while now. It’s was probably last year or so that I didn’t really use help that much but I drop by regularly now.

http://www.anime.com/Sakura_Wars/imag…
http://www.kawapaper.com/d/12966-2/Ka…
See what I mean? Your picture lacks the katana, but it’s pretty close otherwise…
Do you have the ability to instant-message your niece or something? I mean, it’s pretty rude of me again to ask as I’m but a stranger and all, but if you can, I’d greatly appreciate it.

How old is your niece then, and her parents? It seems pretty tight on the time scale as you need to be 14 just to register.

Are you back now? I glad the community is increasing in size despite the current situation.

I see. Well, the past doesn’t matter that much as long as you’ve made some good friends here, eh?

Niece? Mm, but then again it’s rude to ask a lady her age.
Whoa (I like the way you spell woah). Is the current avatar hers as well, or did you change it back to yours?
Why didn’t she make another account using a different email?

I’m curious to hear what brought you into our community, if you don’t mind telling.

How are you?
I see. Well, where’s the anime-ish avatar taken from? The one with the blue background.
http://help.com/user/27402-hello-user…

Hello Sandy,
Long time since I last spoke to you, how are you?
Your friend,
Luck of the Irish (aka Ireland)

Hello.
This might sound a tad crazy, but have you heard of Sakura Taisen?

=D

‘hey sweetie! sorry about the delay in my response again hun, just been a bit busy lately.”

No need to be sorry Sandy, I have been MIA for 2 weeks! Thank God you didnt even notice and get pissed off at me!

=P

How are you BTW?

“My dog is a beagle, named Mickey.”

=O
Beautiful!
Is he passive or aggressive?
Bring him to me!

“And honostly, bringing you along to help keep an eye on me wouldn’t be such a bad idea. God knows I couldn’t go wrong with another set of eyes looking after me.

Holy crap! Was that sarcasm Sandy? ’cause I was laughing!

(*pause)
(*now thinking)

Hmmm…You know… come to think of it for a moment and you being the good person you are…I actually would keep an eye out and keep you out of harms way, but the moment you confront me saying that you want to do something I believed would not benefit you, I’d leave you alone and respect your decision…but you’d lose about 23 brownie points.

“How are you sweetie?”

I am alright, thank you for your consideration.
=)
Been a lil’ bit busy these past weeks AND I did meet someone which I am getting to know…hmmm…but idk right this moment if its going to work out, she’s a nice girl and all (’bout 5 years older than you! lol) but our goals dont quite match well.

eh…that sucks a bit.

=P

Sooo…how about you? How is Sandy Sugar Pop’s heart doing? Whats up with the nails? Whats crackin’?

Gimme updates on you!
-joey

=O
Sandy!

I thought you were going to do a stunt and dissappear!
=)

“And no I have a dog.”

=O
What kind?

Chihuahua?

Whats the name?

“But the glue is really strong so I’m not going get artificial nails bc they can mess up your real nail.”

That doesnt sound good. Nice to hear you aint doing them artificial ones. Whats it gonna be then? French?

“But I went out drinking with some friends last night and lost my wallet. Which sucks since I rescently lost my phone too.”

Sandy wtf,
lol
you lost things again?

Oh my God. I remember you mentioned you lost something else on a previous convo we had! xD
Your getting to the point where your gonna have to go out and invite me so I can keep on eye on your behaviour young lady.

About how many times has this happened (where you lost things)? ’cause I believe that if its in the same hangout spot, someone is getting rich off you!

lol

“But it only takes less then 10 minutes.”

Thats fast!

“Tired from last night and pretty frustrated I keep loosing my things but I’m okay.”

Frustration is normal in that situation, Id be pissed.

How are you feeling now?

“How are you hun? How’s life and etc.?”

Im good strawberry loli pop, feeling nice. I was kinda surprised to see your reply BTW, it was nice hearing from you. As of right now Im trying to come up with what colors to paint some of the walls in the apt. Besides that, its all good.
=)

Later sandy. Let me know how you are doing….whenever you log back on!
xD

-joey

Hi Sandy!

How ‘ya feeling?

=D

Hey!
=D

“Give them lots of support and be open to whatever topic they want to talk about. I want them to feel safe with me but not looking to be their “friend”.”

I can agree with that, but I would like them to be close enough to come to one whenever they have problems and stuff like that.
Id be always supporting mine too, from the time they are babies and up!

“I actually have a dog right now.”

Borrowed? or do you own one?

My sister has 2 shitzu’s which I see basically everyday…they are like queens here.
=P
lotta’ love

“If I have artificial nails I wouldn’t have to wry about them for a couple months.”

So thats why you girls use artificial?

“But then again I hate how artificial nails ruin your actual nail so I’m not so sure I want to get them done.”

See…now that sucks.

So…let me get this straight…if you use your real nails it would be more troublesome than using artificial ones? Why is that?
How can you not have to worry for a couple months with artificial ones?

Im learning here!

“Under the influence of alcohol makes me more social and, usually, more sexual.”

…hmmm…let me see, it makes you feel less reserved…less shy?

“But I’m not dependent on drinking. “

Sandy…I believe this is relative bc I think you are dependent to a certain point.

“Though I do plan to cut down on the drinking.”

Thats what I like to hear from you, pudding cup.

“The website is just “fmylife.com” it’s actually pretty funny and you should definitly check it out.”

I did, i read a couple stuff but I didnt know whether to believe what most were saying or what!
It was funny though.

BTW Have you posted there?

“Well Joey, you can’t blame a girl for wanting a visit from her buddy during his lunch breaks, can you?”

Yes I can, wanna see?
=P

I would have 1 hour of a lunch break from which the travel time would be 10 minutes the drive home from the office, ten minutes a drive back to it…so I would actually have about 40 minutes to eat something hopefully ‘deliciously addictive’ Sandy would have not too hot, but warm enough for me to taste, lick, and eat.

40 minutes enough for ya’ honey? or would you need me to pay you another visit when I get out at 5pm to eat some more?

Let me know in advance.

“How are you? Any plans for the weekend? Take care of yourself too hun.”

Im good. Its almost 12am and I just got home. A lil’ headache but right now Im getting kind of sleepy so Ill be hitting the bed soon and expecting the headache to go away. I will take care of myself sweetie. Thank you.

You know what to do. You are intelligent Sandy, and ‘intelligence’ is one of those attractive non-physical characteristics you posses.

Let me know how you are doing now.

BTW, Is your friend from Portugal OK?

I have a question that just popped in my mind…is your hair manageable or do you have to work on it a lot to get it under control sometimes?

=)

Later Sandy,
-joey

“I may make a few more mistakes then others but in the end I am okay.”

Fair to me.

“I want to make sure my kids have siblings since I’m not very close with my family (other then my own siblings and parents) so I my kids have eachother in case something were to happen and they needed the emotional support (if I or the father of my kids weren’t around).”

Sounds logical.
What type of relationship would you like to develop with your kids?

“And I love animals. Completely adore them.”

What type of animals?

“I’m thinking I might get artificial nails and get the french (white) tip again.”

Wait! Arent your nails long enough for not having to use artificial ones?

“I really do need to moderate my drinking better though. It’s just booze takes a while to hit me so sometimes it’s just too late to turn back. But I’m sure if I just stay more consious of my drinking I will be better with it.”

Sandy, this is the part that sounds a lil non-approved by joey. I know you know already, and you actually make what you just wrote sound like it went kinda bad?

=/

I have another question for ya’…
When you go out with the girls or have those get togethers…are you the only one with too much to drink? or are your friends like that also?…and another one:
How do you behave when under the influence of alcohol?

Sandy, Im not trying to make you feel bad or anything of that matter, im not judging you either BTW.
There are interesting aspects of you that I find interesting.

I am glad to see that you actually recognize on your own that you sometimes have too much to drink sometimes and that you should do something about it.
That my friend, I do approve.

“And sadly, no I don’t remember the name of the movie. “

=O

“I was thinking of hitting the bar with a few of my girlfriends but I felt a little hungover this morning so I decided I was just going to stay in.”

The way you said that was funny.

“Have you ever heard of the website fmylife.com?”

?
Is it supposed to be “f#Ck my life”.com?
=O
No, I have not, I have been barely using the computer during the week because of the daily stuff I do, but I will check it out later on. Ill see whats up.
=)

“So hope you are doing well and all the best. Can’t wait to hear about your day and etc. “

That sounds sweet of you, hence why your second name should be ’sweetie’…even though it would sound corny as hell and most likely someone would be making fun of it!
Im good though. All normal, watching how my friend sandy gets mad at me when I get home from work because I didnt go home during my lunch hour, but its fine because she knows I dont care that much when she wants to drink a lil too much while having fun with her friends.

=D

What do you think?

………….

Listen chocolate pudding, take care of yourself.
Let me know how you are feeling, and if you check your email more often than login’ on Help.com…

Later.
-joey

=D

theyve split my schedule at work so tonight is my one night off before going back for three days and off one. its a little more rigid than I would like but its work.

Im kinda doin the “hang at home and chill” thing myself. got a specific movie in mind? I myself am leaning toward oceans 11

hey sorry bout the tardy reply but to answer it was fun. a little more brief than I had anticipated (her schedule got pushed up so she left later that night and is back in utah. hows things with you?

“Argh I had almost written this again on my wall before I noticed and copied the message I was about to send to you. But then I accidently coppied something else, not realising I hadn’t pasted this message yet :(”

=O

lol

that sucks!

“Anyways don’t be worried. “

Bah…don’t worry Sandy, Im not. Maybe you might not always make the wisest decisions, but Im sure you are mature enough to be safe and take pretty good care of yourself.

Besides, I took your word (that you were OK).

“I just made a bad decision but what can you do now? Learn from your mistakes and move on.”

Yep.

“How about you joey, you like kids?”

Girl, you dont know how I would love to find an awesome wife to have like a max of…let me see…maybe 3 with!

How about you? About how many would you have?

Now with animals, Im not that crazy about but I wouldnt mind if a gf had one living in my house with her, but she better take good care of it! I am an animal rights defender!

=D

“Sadly my nails aren’t looking so good, gotta clean them up soon.”

=O

What will you do on them this time?

“I’ll make that list asap, I definitly need a few things.”

Thats what Im talkin’ bout sweetie.

“Anyways hope everything is well Joey, hope to hear from you soon hun. :) “

Yea, all good. As of right now its raining hard and it sucks because I was going to go to the mall but turned back because of it. I hope it stops later on so I can go buy me some clothing. But you know…I kinda dont like going to the mall alone when I have to buy cloth bc I need a woman’s sense of fashion to help me out with the choosing of what looks nice on me, Im not that good at it, lol. I can make it though.

Ill be staying at my ‘crib’ in the meantime, maybe watch a dvd …get entertained with something. Did you ever remember that movie’s name? The one you were telling me about when we were talking about scary movies?

Well chocolaty meow, take care of yourself and let me know how you are feeling. Also Sandy, let me know if anything is bothering you ok?

Later.
=P

-joey

=)

“how are you hun?”

Hmmm…

Im good…but I’ll tell you that reading some of your shout made me think a bit…

“Did have a little too much to drink but I really don’t want to talk about thet. What’s done is done.”

Now this worries me a bit pudding cup…a lil tipsy? a fight? or was it something bad that happened…

=/

(*joey stops typing and thinks for a sec)

Eh…Im taking your word that you are “okay” and Ill stop the “worrying a bit”.

“My girlfriend just had her baby recently, so I’m really happy for her.”

This made me ask…Sandy, you love kids?

“My other girlfriend just came back from portugal yesterday night so I’m planning on seeing her tomorrow or something and catch up.”

Cool.
She ok BTW?

“My friend recommended me try meditation so I’m trying it out, hopefully it will help keep me calm, centered and at peace.”

If it doesnt work, you can let me know.

“anyways how are you sweetie? how have you been doing? how’s work etc. etc.? “

Im OK, all good, thank you for asking bunnybear. Work is as usual, nicely imposing some respect whenever we have a smart ass customer lol, I work for a federal agency, so most listen to your instructions. I like that leadership type stuff, customer service responsibility thing.
You know…I just looked at my surroundings (here in my apartment) and I just noticed I need to organize and re-clean up a bit. Hmmm…I have to make a list of things i need and go to the supermarket and buy ‘em. Ill pick you up like at 2pm, so make a list of your own.
=P

Sandy, Im glad to hear from you. I bet your nails look nice and neat. Keep those eyes with the eyeliner pretty and those lips looking glossy and good.

Let me know how you are feeling and how your heart is doing.

Take care!

hiyaa
how are you hun?
Anyways I’m doing well. My friends get-to-gether was good. Did have a little too much to drink but I really don’t want to talk about thet. What’s done is done. But I am doing well. My girlfriend just had her baby recently, so I’m really happy for her. My other girlfriend just came back from portugal yesturday night so I’m planning on seeing her tomorrow or something and catch up. Things are going slow and steady but okay. I’m feeling pretty settled. My friend recommended me try meditation so I’m trying it out, hopefully it will help keep me calm, centered and at peace.
anyways how are you sweetie? how have you been doing? how’s work etc. etc.?

Hey!

“sorry about the late reply :)”

I was starting to forget what we were talkin’ bout!
=)

“Anyways I’m doing well. Just about to head out soon, spend some time with some friends, talk, have a few drinks. “

Nice.

“I did change my hair BTW to the maroon and blonde. It looks fine, whih there was more blonde highlights in it but I’m happy with it.”

=O
Awesome, I have to see that!

“My sister went to get her hair done with me as well, I really liked what she did. “

What did she do to her hair, Sandy?

“I’m thinking next time I’m going to dye all my hair a kind of dark copper-y red and have a thick blond streak on the top side.”

Sounds nice, but wait!….Im having trouble imagining that.
The blonde streak would go from where to where?

“Anyways hope you’re doing well, hows life? “

Life is OK, all good and running nice. A lil busy but Im good.
=P

Im glad you are doing OK, Im not loggin’ on as much but Im still around. Nice to see your shout babycakes, let me know how it went (your friend-get-together) and how you are feeling the moment you get to read this, have fun!

-joey

=)

well I work tonight but found out a friend who I havent seen in a few months is back in town till tomorrow. waiting for her to call me we made sort of a date. but she hasnt called me back yet with a time she wants to meet. (Ive left two messages allready so I figure I dont wanna make too many calls. other than that life is good.

meh hectic but allright I suppose. up to anything adventurous today?

hey sandy, hows things?

Hi!

“I worry I made a mistake with the guy I was seeing, and maybe I should have gave it a shot, but whatever. I’ll live and will find someone worth spending my time with, it may just take a while.”

Try and not push yourself Sandy.

“I felt pretty alone and even more confused about my life back home and what I wanted and what I planned to do with everything. ”

Alone over at your sisters?

How was the tension between you and her?

Hmmm…

How was that Sandy self-”brainstorming”?
And what did you conclude?

Interesting.

“I feel so much pressure into finding a man that I can really cligue with, but it’s driving me insane! I just want to not care so much and enjoy the single life.”

=S

Let me tell you this…if you feel too much pressure into “finding someone”, it may be caused by a lack of things to do with your life, you may be giving it too much attention.
Pralines ‘n cream, its OK to feel that way sometimes, but not constantly (every breath you take).

How frequent do you feel that way, BTW?

=/

Listen…I understand, ’cause sometimes I feel that sort of pressure myself, especially at my age.
But I cant just be with someone I dont feel helps me reach that “next level of self-betterness”. I cant “settle”. I have my set of things I can and cannot accept, I believe I know what I want.
You know this already.

“Hoping to get together with some girlfriends tomorrow, go to the bar and have some fun. A nice girls-night-out.”

How did it go?

“Aha I was asking what goes through your mind generally, but it couldn’t hurt to know what goes through your mind about me also.”

Sweetie, “generally” would be too (as you said before) “vague”. lol
But to say something, the best way you can know what goes thru joey’s mind is by getting to know him and coming to your own conclusions, you’d see.

=)

BTW, Joey doesn’t “kiss and tell”.

=P

And what I think about you…
Hmmm…let me go get something…(*walking towards my room, *gets a book, *walks back to the computer)
I will quote the definition of the word “Sandy” straight from my current personal dictionary…check this out:

“Sandy: 1. a french manicured, lip glossed eyeliner’ed cute lil’ tot. 2. A cool friend to hang around with, someone you’d enjoy listening and talking to. 3. Sarcastic at times. 4. A Cutiepop.”

*Definition may be subject to revisions, reviews and updates!

..and Im assuming you already know what things I respectfully disagree with when contrasting my ideas with yours.

“Anyways, hope to hear from you soon hun and hope you have been doing well and had an amazing day. “

Im alright thank you. My day was good.

how was your day?
How are you feeling now?

Nice to see your shout, take care Sandy!

=)

Join us..and give us your Opinion..
pick one ..
http://help.com/post/303963-love-or-m…

You’r Welcome There
Thanks Very Much

Hey!
=)

“Aha the hard part is finding what I want. I don’t know.”

Hmmm…I think you should know more less what type of person you would want. Something like: independent, works, takes care of himself, is caring, (whatever floats your boat Sandy)
…Another example would be all that stuff we spoke about before.

“Are you suppose to just fall for them? I’m starting to forget how it feels to actually fall for somebody.”

To me, sometimes it develops while you get to know the person, but you have to be comfortable and feel wanting to be close to that other person. Another thing is you should know or at least have an idea of the type of man you want (sure of himself, secure, knows where he is going, not cocky, respectful, a challenge, etc…its what you want).

Other times you feel those butterflies (at least in the beginning).

What do you think?

“I don’t know if I’m doing the right thing, but I’m lucky for many things and today I’ve been thinking I shouldn’t take advantage of it.”

Not take advantage of what?

“I think it has to due with the fact I’m leaving tomorrow for four days to my sister’s boyfriends cottage in hope of rekindling our relationship, which honostly I’m not looking forward to.”

=/

“And honostly I love my sister and would help her whenever she needed it, but her and I just don’t clique. Our personalities just don’t match. So I’m just really nervous and frustrated about this trip.”

I understand.

Sandy, Id say give it a shot, maybe she has changed a bit and besides, you wont know ’til you try. Your sister is most likely nervous too.
If it doesnt work out, then leave it at that so things dont worsen.

Let me know.

“Anyways I’m happy I could impress you :)”

Im glad Im getting to conversate with an intelligent young woman. Its one of the reasons you have maintained my interest Sandy.
To me, a woman should not be measured much by her physical attributes (although it may help in the initial attraction). She should be measured by whats in her mind, her intelligence level, experience, and a bunch of other things. Thats what joey aims for.

What would you say to that?

“I just have alot to think about. One of the only reasons I’m looking forward to this trip is so I can excape for a bit, maybe clear my head and figure out what I really want.”

Yes, give it some time, distract yourself for a bit. I know its not easy right now, but its recent, you are pretty wise, youll get passed it.
I will be here if you need anything BTW.
You know what though? You should take 2 extra days and get your a$$ to PR!

=D

“How do you feel? How are your emotions? etc. etc.”

Well juicy cherry, Im doing good. My heart is doing fine.
Thank you for asking.
=P

But Yea, Im sleeping well. I just might go to the movies in a couple of hours and watch “District 9″.

Are you sleeping OK?

“I barely know what goes through your mind.”

Im pretty much an assertive, chill, laid back guy, Id be smiling at you looking at your eyes right now…But what do you want to know about joey, lil miss sweet and creamy? About what goes through my mind in regards to Sandy or in general?

“anyways take care hun.”

I will sweetie, you too take care!

Let me know how the trip goes and how you are feeling. Id like to hear it.
=D

Sandy, whats up!
=D

“Respectful, caring, available to them when they want me to be. Also being friends with my partners friends and vice versa is important to me. It’s pretty much as if they were my friend minus the intamacy.”

Thats sounds good…let me keep on reading…

“I also put in more of an effort into the relationship and try to get to know them and allow them to get to know me. I’m very loving and affectionate at times, though usually my partner has to be the one to initiate it.”

What?
You sound like someone the majority would want!

“Not that I’m shy but it just how I’m built. How about you?”

Its wise to know your limits and what you can or cannot do, nice to hear the way you speak.

I dont say much, I am more an “action” type man as in doing things and not saying. To me its a “feeling” thing Sandy, not something I can force myself to do.

Yep…Some call me joey, and to get the whole picture as who I am as a partner you’d have to actually get to know me much better. Love is a 2 way street.

“And aha Joey I’m teasing you, trying to put a smile on your face.”

=)

Im not worried, but who says you dont put a smile on my face Sandy?

=O

“And honostly I would have to get to know you as a partner then just a person before I have your heart on my hands.”

I just read that…and you know sandy…
thats a mature thing to say.
You just impressed me again sweetie.

Im starting to believe you are not 20, but a bit older.
=P

“I don’t know if I’m ready for that commitment. Then again I am looking for a serious relationship.”

Its like I have told you before chocolate coated strawberry, you havent met a compatible match.

“I’m just kind of confused bc I don’t know if I’m gaining more then what I’m loosing. On one hand I had someone who was affectionate, interested in me and gave me a lot of attention. On the other hand I was honest with a guy, didn’t use him, and now I can look forward to meeting someone I really do like.”

I understand Sandy…but I see it this way though:
If you could not feel being that “who you are as a partner” person you described to me at the beginning of the shout, then I think you would have been “settling”. Something like “eh..he is a good guy and has good traits, but I dont feel him.”

I believe you are supposed to feel happy and “wanting to give” in a relationship.

“Anyway hope you had a nice day and all the best. “

Thanks, and you too!

“BTW sorry about the delay in reply, I sent the message to myself again.. :) “

?
Did you?
I didnt get to log on yesterday, so its all good Sandy!
lol

Let me know how you are feeling now and how your day went.

Take care!

=)

Hey hun
Uhm who I am as a partner…I treate them the same as I would to anybody I care about. Respectful, caring, available to them when they want me to be. Also being friends with my partners friends and vice versa is important to me. It’s pretty much as if they were my friend minus the intamacy. I also put in more of an effort into the relationship and try to get to know them and allow them to get to know me. I’m very loving and affectionate at times, though usually my partner has to be the one to initiate it. Not that I’m shy but it just how I’m built. How about you?
And aha Joey I’m teasing you, trying to put a smile on your face. You don’t have to worry about anything, I don’t plan on you being easy. And honostly I would have to get to know you as a partner then just a person before I have your heart on my hands.
I’m just kind of confused bc I don’t know if I’m gaining more then what I’m loosing. On one hand I had someone who was affectionate, interested in my and gave me alot of attention. On the other hand I was honost with a guy, didn’t use him, and now I can look forward to meeting someone I really do like.
Anyway hope you had a nice day and all the best.

Heya Sandy!

“The worst I have ever thought was, “What did I do to deserve this?” or “Why did this happen to me?””

ah…classic.
Been there Sandy and I completely understand.

I would like you to tell me…When you are or were in a relationship…how did you treat that other person?
…wait….let me rephrase that, How is Sandy when in a relationship?

“Aha alot of work and cleverness?

Yes cherry.
Besides, I think you may be a lil bit too young to understand my ways.

“Now that sounds like a challenge to me joey.”

Well…’candyman joey’ may be understanding, a listener, mature and all, but he aint easy!

What.

Do you know how to handle having a heart on your hands?

=O

=D

“And thanks for thinking I’m a great and beautiful person.”

?
What I said should not be a surpirse for you, I go with reasons behind it.
A couple convos’ and questions to you and I’ll keep getting a more/less idea of Sandy’s essence as a person.

“I ended it with that guy last night. “

=O

“I just sent him a text saying how I thought he was a great guy and I really respect him but I think it would be better if we stopped seeing eachother as anything but friends.”

=O

Im glad to see you were honest with the guy Sandy. Thats respectable.

“I’m kind of confused right now. “

Confused as in how?

To my understanding, its normal for you to feel that way at this moment.
I think you will be clear a couple of days from now. Its still a bit recent.

“And I want to meet somebody that will make me feel happy to be with. “

I know.
=)

“I’m not asking for “forever” but I just, like you said, miss that feeling when you actually have deep feelings for somebody.”

Go on caramel…Im listening…

“Anyways I’m still doing well and I hope you are too hun. All the best and have a great day. “

Yea, Im good thank you for worrying. Nothing new happened today. A lot of rain though and Im trying to not “take a nap” now bc then I wont be able to fall asleep before 12 am!

Sandy,
take care…let me know how you eventually start feeling and what that “Im kind of confused right now” was about. Im interested.

I hope you too had a great day!

:)
No I never blame myself for someone not wanting me. You can’t make someone not willing to love you, love you. The worst I have ever thought was, “What did I do to deserve this?” or “Why did this happen to me?”
Aha alot of work and cleverness? Now that sounds like a challenge to me joey. And thanks for thinking I’m a great and beautiful person. I ended it with that guy last night. I just sent him a text saying how I thought he was a great guy and I really respect him but I think it would be better if we stopped seeing eachother as anything but friends. You want to know his response? “Ok, works for me.” Hmm I guess I expected that. I’m kind of confused right now. But I think I made the right decision. And I want to meet somebody that will make me feel happy to be with. I’m not asking for “forever” but I just, like you said, miss that feeling when you actually have deep feelings for somebody. Anyways I’m still doing well and I hope you are too hun. All the best and have a great day.

=D

“But you should know, I have never stayed in a relationship with someone when I realised it just wasn’t right.”

=)

“Of course I stay in for a little longer only to see how I feel but I never stick with it just for the guilt.”

Nice you make that clear.
It kinda means you may have a fragile heart, but you aren’t weak.

But I think we already know that!

“aha thanks, but honostly the way I see it is, being “attractive” is just an accident of birth that, coincidentally, the stereotypes and judgements of the world work in favor of.”

Accident of birth lol
I never thought of it that way, but it makes sense.

You are right, and finding something/someone attractive varies from person to person.

“Everybody should be happy with who they are inside and out, a confident (but not cocky) person always seems more “attractive”.”

I can agree with that.

“But thanks you’re very sweet. “

Thank you, you are too Sandy, dont be blaming that one on me only!

“Wouldn’t it be easier though if you could see someone’s inner beauty at a glance? would save so much time and effort.”

Yes.

Especially in your case. I see what you mean now, but I will tell you that you shouldnt worry too much about it. To me it seems like you just havent found your match bc none have been good enough for you, idk whats wrong with those guys and why none have actually stopped, observed, and understood you, I dont think its something wrong with you.

Wait…that made me ask…would you actually think there is something wrong with you?
(I hope not!)

“Aha and I agree with you hun, I definitly don’t want a guy that follows any of those characteristics.”

You better not, bc that would kinda change the perception I have of you Sandy.

=O

“And I really don’t know about the Radiohead song…I’m pretty sure it’s recent but I just really like that one.”

That would make us 2 bc I like it too.

But Idk, I saw “2006″ on the youtube description…? Im thinking its not very old.

“I can’t say I’ve ever seen the commercials with Song 2 in it.”

..I can recall seeing some, but not sure which…I found this on the net:

“This was used in commercials by 2 different auto makers: Mercedes-Benz used it to promote its S-class cars, Nissan used it for The Sentra. It was also used in ads for video game FIFA ‘98 and for Pentium II processors.”

=S

“Aha yes, a sweet melody would be lovely.”

If the first one turns out sweet, make it 2!

=D

“And though I may want to see you dance around in your underwear to Song 2, it’s only for your own good when I tell you it’s a great song to dance in your underwear.”

That caught me kinda off guard!
hahaha

It would take a lot of work and “cleverness” for some great beautiful looking girl to see me like that! =O
Its like “Restricted Area, Only Authorized Person Zone” and Im one hell of’a Security Guard!

“Exclusive”!

=D

“But I just wanted to let you know I realise I am okay and fine, and I’m very happy.”

Thank you for letting me know Sandy. I appreciate that.

“If something unexpected or crazy comes up in your life, I’m open to hear about it :)”

Thank you, you know I am here paying attention, and if you need anything I can help you with, let me know twinkie.

“Your nicknames you give me (lil’ chocolate, Strawberry Shortcake, sweetie strawberry peaches and cream) are adorable”

2 things:

1. My pleasure.
2. Your fault.

haha
=P

Sandy, let me know how your day went, I want to know how you are feeling. BTW, I did sleep well last nite, thanks. Did you?

Oh another thing…Did your friend in Portugal ever let you know how she is doing?

Take care!
-joey

PS: I just realized I can sometimes make some typo mistakes in my shouts! Are points deducted for that Prof. Sandy?

=O

=O

I was about to go to sleep but after checking my e mails I went on Help to make sure I didnt shout myself and there is Sandys shout already! That was fast!

=D

Hello again Sandy!

‘Aha well I may be a terrible co-pilot but that’s what motels are for aren’t they?”

Idk? you tell me and show me the way young lady! Actually, you are the one with the directions and official co-pilot for a reason.
=D

…”realising the guy isn’t what you want and having you start over. And feeling that if I don’t date somebody else I’m not actually moved on from my ex.”

I understand, but no Sandy, it seems to me you pressure yourself a bit. Pressure can lead to somewhat desperate decisions/acts. You are only 20 years old (not to judge you!), you have a whole life ahead of you, you are too good to be messing yourself up with heartaches over guys that arent worth the time and genuine care you invest in them.
Its like I told you in my previous shout, you know what you want already, now its a matter of that other person knowing what he wants and man up about it, dont you think?

=/

Tell me more.

“That feeling where I look into a guy’s eyes and “actually get nervous and feel my heart beat a bit faster”. I really really miss that. I miss actually having some body I like have feelings for me, and just being in love.”

You are not alone on that, believe me. I understand.
That nervous rush is always awesome though.

“But I know the time will come at the most unexpected time and I just have to be honost with myself. “

Thats right.
Let me tell you this lil’ chocolate…with your looks you will attract all types of men (aholes, insecure dudes, fakes, good ones, too nice ones,…etc) bc of your level of attractiveness (physical attributes).
Now, the thing is that you have to sort out the BS from all you attract, and from there comes the hurts, heartaches, the “I thought he was like this…” etc…
And you keep sorting out until you stumble across someone who is comaptible and man enough for you. Someone mature enough and up to your status.

Being naturally good looking is always nice Sandy, but it has its downsides too, especially for a woman.

“Now this has nothing to do with me but I was just wandering, what is the best way to break up with a guy (in your oppinion)? “

In a normal, casual fashion. It would also depend on the level of trust you have with that other person.

For example…
Lets say Sammy Flex (an invented character) likes you, but you didnt like him back, and he keeps on insisting (making you feel awkward and uncomfortable at times) and you said nothing bc you “didnt want to hurt him”, right?
…Well, (assuming he is a real man) I believe Sammy would appreciate it if you told him…

“you know Sammy Flex, you are a good guy, I respect you and I am not here to play around with your feelings. I get the sense that you want more than a friendship from me, but I just dont feel I can reciprocate those feelings. I can only see you as a friend nothing more, and I truly appreciate your friendship.”

Something like that Strawberry Shortcake. Yes his Heart will be crushed, he will feel “rejected” but neither you nor he can help it, and its not your fault bc his Heart has a mind of its own! (Heart = Creates feelings that he can only control but not avoid having).
You following me, sweetie?
Now, his conscience (Mind) will actually rationalize what you just said and he will appreciate your honesty, which in turn will earn you respect.
(The mind, along with time, is supposed to eventually convince the heart that it would not have worked out, bc Sandy was not into him…and he would understand, therefore appreciating you not playing around with him).

BUT WAIT!
If he acts all stalker, abusive, immature, insulting, offensive, etc…then he has a problem and thank God you didnt end up with him as a partner, bc that would say he was never a man, but one of these a million a dime “macho boy”s.
You dont want that.

“Do you know oasis’ song, “Supersonic”? “

Yes, but I barely remembered that one, I had to youtube it!

“Do you know the song by Radiohead, “high and dry”? “

What!
Is that recent?
I just heard that one and saw the video and had no idea it existed!
2006?

The one I really remembered from them is “creep”, i used to play that over and over!

“Or “Bittersweet symphony” by The Verve?”

Yes! How could I forget those violins!
BUT! You can recite the lirics to to that one while you give me directions Sandy, bc I do not know the words to it!

=O

“And aha well you are open to touch my radio anyday Joey.”

I would Sandy, but I was thinking we would have to find a sweet melody we would both feel and agree listening to though.

You cool with that?

“It’s nice to know that one of the billion of laughters that occured in this world today was caused by me :)”

?
lol

Dont sweat it, you’re good Sandy.
In fact…I like that you have substance in things you say.

“Also Joey, hun how are you?”

Are you as this considerate in real life ‘hun’?

=P
…Im OK Sandy, feeling pretty good, A lot of work at my job and already sleepy by 11pm, but all systems normal on my part.

Thank you for asking.

‘””””’

Sandy…keep me updated on how you are feeling, and BTW, I dont mind you listening to you, dont forget…Im here to help you out in what I can.

Do take care, keep that eyeliner rockin’ and sleep well (whenever you lay your head on the pillow), have no worries, you are OK.

PS:

“BTW I just remembered, do you know that song from the 90’s, “Song 2″ by Blur? “

Yes I have!
Is that the one people have used even in commercials?
I youtubed it (to refresh my mind and yes I clearly remember that one!)

“It’s one of those songs that sound better loud…extremely loud when you’re home alone and dance around only in your underwear.”

hahaha
Now who would want to see me do that?!

Someone named Sandy?!

“PS. sorry for sending you three messages. I kept forgetting to add stuff before I finished :) “

I forgive you.
;)

lol

Later Sandy.

Oh wait!..i forgot to ask you, did you change your hair color (to that Kelly Clarkson colors) or not yet?

=D

=O

=D

Hey Sandy!

“Aha no I don’t mean that hun. I mean that if you gave me directions, even the simplest, I would still find a way to mess them up.”

Oh!
hahaha

Well, know that Im notorious for taking the long routes to a specific place thinking they are the shortest!
=D

“Also I’m terrible at memorizing how to get to places I’ve already been. So even if I’ve been there a couple times I would still need assistence.”

=O
Oh my God. It would be scary having no cel signal, driving at night and you as a co pilot!

“Sure, not everybody will agree with me, but I may not agree with others as well. I’m just a strong believer in people doing what makes them happy (to a certain extent).”

=)

“Everybody is different and we can’t all agree with eachother, now can we?”

Well, you have those ‘close minded people’ that believe its “their way or the high way”…and then there are people like us that eventhough we might disagree on some things, we still are open to each others opinion.
*wink!*

“Aha now I wouldn’t want you to pinch the lower left side of my hip, so I guess I have to tell you.”

Thank you, because I would have had to use my other special methods and I dont like to share them much.

“I’m realising that, though he is a good guy, he doesn’t fit the mold of men that I am looking for. I’m trying to give him a chance because it may be possible that since my ex it may just take some time before I feel attracted to another guy again, but I’m worried that I’m just lying to myself and am not, and may never, be truely attracted to this guy.”

(this is what I wrote before you noticed for yourself you werent into him!) :

OK…look Sandy, f’that “trying to give him a chance” crap, its you who needs to give yourself a chance. And aparently your heart is not ready yet.

Let me tell you something ’sweetie strawberry peaches and cream’, either you like him or not, either you are attracted to him and have a high interest level or he is not your guy, period.
He can be the nicest guy, but if you don’t feel it, then its a matter of time before he starts to get all clingier and crap and eventually the same might happen.
Why?
Because its not your fault Sandy,

you heard me?

Not

Your

Fault.

You need a guy that meets your standards and trusts you, someone who is sure of himself, knows what he wants in a relationship, the type of woman he would like to be with, and someone who trusts you.
You do not need a glued insecure monkey on your back calling you every step you take..know what Im saying?

I believe you need a guy who understands you, one who gets to know you in a emotionally deeper way, he who would walk in your shoes and respect your ideas, and space.
Someone who is flexible enough to control and evict his “macho” insecurities from within and focus on reality.

How about some fries with that?

“And if it obviously doesn’t feel right, I can’t keep dragging him along because he deserves someone actually interested and I deserve someone who actually makes me happy.”

Im glad that even though we might disagree on some stuff, we agree on other things… like what you have just stated.

Just be honest with him whenever you feel its right. Believe me, and I tell you as a man, that a woman not saying anything and playing along “not wanting to hurt me” is worse than being up front with your feelings. I have much more respect for a woman when shes upfront.
Its not good to feel pity for someone while faking something you dont feel.

Now…I totally understand your point Sandy, i can see your worries and where they more less stem from. You are an emotional being, remember?
I also believe you are like forcing yourself to feel for someone and not letting it flow naturally (no matter the outcome).
Let me give you an example…after I broke up with my ex it took me a hell of time (almost a year!) to be able to look into another girls eyes and actaully get nervous and feel my heart beat a bit faster.
Do I dwell on my ex? No.
Do I sometimes think about a new prospect (a potential gf)? Yes.

What Im saying is, you will feel it when it comes. You will know. Right now, from what I gather in what you shouted I believe he is not your guy.
Dont you want that “man” I asked you to define for me last time, Sandy? Or some guy you feel pity for?
=S

Give me your opinion on all this mega long stuff I just wrote. I want to hear it from you.
You are pretty good to discuss things with.

“BTW I love Nirvana :D This is probably an obvious band but have you ever listened to the Red Hot Chili Peppers? They’re a great band. Also Oasis is a good band (Wanderwall is a great song).”

*Facepalm!*
holy crap, of course!
You made me remember with that link! Thank you!

90’s is not my strong point but I used to like A LOT of those songs!
Sheesh Joey, how the hell could you forget!

Ahh..I still listen to that Rage Against the Machine sometimes. Yes I remember Wonderwall (Oasis!) remember the song they had “supernova”?, I also liked the cranberries, smashing pumpkins…ah…good times!

You know what?
I give you permission to touch my radio now.

Props.
Nice choice.

“…I was actually just going to apologize for saying sorry so much. “

?
You were kidding, right?

That made me laugh Sandy!

“Writing this message, realising if in the end I don’t like this guy, I have to end it even though it would be another disapointment it would get me closer to finding a guy I actually have feelings for.”

Ah!
Before I wrote all that, I didnt read the end of your shout (where you realized you arent into him)!

=D

lol

But anyways, there went my .2 cents!

AND! Im glad you figured it out by yourself though, you actually impress me sometimes you know Sandy?

……

You made me laugh today, thank you for that. You have my opinion in regards to the situation you are facing, thats me being honest…now keep taking care of yourself and let me know how you are feeling now, and I would like to know how things are going with you also.
Care to shed some light on that, Miss?

Thank you.
=)

-joey!

Hi!

“wait till you see how I’m with directions, now that will drive you crazy.”

=O

Well lil’ miss muffin, if you gave me wrong directions (acting as if they were right) I would U-turn back and call you on it!

“And I relise it doesn’t give people the best impression of me when I say I’m okay with hook ups, but honostly that is who I am. Sometimes I don’t mind having a one-night stands when I’m in the moment.”

I cannot judge you on anything you find fine doing. I simply have my way of seeing it and you wont hear me saying the same thing.
=)

Just so you know Sandy, I am NOT someone who could judge you or any other human being as if I were perfect or something. I can only agree or disagree with you and respect whatever opinion or belief you might have regarding any subject we might talk about.

I would like you to NOT think I am looking down on you because I am not. I would still give you a hug, read your writings (only if you’d like to discuss them!), and appreciate your sketches if you ever felt bad, or were sad bc of something that happened. Or I’d simply leave you alone.

You know…I personally find it an attractive quality that you have your own set of views and are the person you like being, you are your own self and thats admirable. You kick quite some wisdom for your age.

Oh!…and that “attractive quality” Im referring to is another type of “strength”, BTW.

The type of strength where you are “strong enough to not let anyone decide for you in your choice to be and act freely as you would please.”

What do you think?

“Sometimes I don’t mind having a one-night stands when I’m in the moment.”

What you may find alright I may find not OK, thats one of the ‘beauty’s’ of getting to know someone.
I have respect for you Sandy, I just disagree.

We good BTW?

“I agree with you there. Too many people say, “I love you” thinking love is someone else making you happy, but love is the willingness to want to make someone else happy.”

Yep. But in the case of being “love” in a relationship…to me, that willingness has to come from both ways.
People like to complicate Love’s definition. Most people still dont know what it really is about.
I could go on and on defining what I believe love is (to me) and its different types, but I am not going to do that…its too much typing…unless you pay me as I am: “handsomely”.

lol

=P

“I just meant basically I’m okay but earlier today I wasn’t doing my best. I’m alot better now I just went to work and then was at a friends place for a little get-together to get my mind off things.”

Sandy…
I just read that and you gave me the impression that something is bothering you. Tell me whats going on, if not, I will pinch the lower left side of your hip!

“BTW joey, how could you not like 90’s rock? I honostly believe, for my taste in music, 90’s rock is the best.”

Eh…i can tell you that some songs are good but Sandy, I think it depends on what songs you are talking about…
from the 90’s I remember I liked Nirvana, uh….let me see what else…(*thinking*)….I cant remember! hahaha

Give me some examples Sandy, gimme some songs or bands you like (from the 90’s) and I will tell you what I think.

“anyways hope your day was good and can’t ait to read all about it :) “

Whats “ait”?
lol

j/k!

My day was pretty good Sandy.
I woke up like at 10am to a sunny and blue sky day, and mowed some lawn. ha!
We then had a family get together at my sisters house to celebrate my grandmothers bday. After that (like at 8pm) I went to visit one of my best friends who came for a couple of days to PR (he lives in New Jersey) bc his grandmother passed away. He is OK though.
Around 9:00pm they were going to leave the house to grab something to eat (him, his brother and mother), so I said my goodbye’s and left.
By now there was rain, dark night, but I had to drive to the gas station and put some gas on the car so i did.
I finally drove to the 24 hour supermarket with a list of a few things I had written down on a piece of an old receipt, I needed:
-milk,
-deodorant,
-axe body spray,
-export soda crackers,
-Corn Flakes (the regular Kellog’s),
-liquid dish detergent which smells nice!

-and butter.

=)

By 10:20something p.m. I made it back to my cosy, silent, calm and comfy apt.
I put everything away, put on some “comfortable sleepy time clothes” which is basically whatever I feel putting on.

Then I logged on the internet to check my emails, a few minutes later on Help and was gladly surprised by a shout left by my young attractive and stylish french manicured nicely eye liner eyed emotional but intelligent friend Sandy.
Now Im shouting back.

That was basically my day.
Getting ready for another week of work also.
=P

How about you?
How are you feeling Sandy?

“okay actually I sent this message to myself again and I was wandering why you hadn’t reply. Sorry (: “

How many times have you said “sorry” since you have gotten to know me? lol

You know Sandy, I didnt get to check if you shouted yourself.
Should I?
=S

Take care.
Now Let me know how things are going with you, emotionally too, Im interested.

Later.

PS: If you remember any movie name, let me know!

Hiya joey.
ahaha sorry for driving you crazy. wait till you see how I’m with directions, now that will drive you crazy.
And I relise it doesn’t give people the best impression of me when I say I’m okay with hook ups, but honostly that is who I am. Sometimes I don’t mind having a one-night stands when I’m in the moment.
I agree with you there. Too many people say, “I love you” thinking love is someone else making you happy, but love is the willingness to want to make someone else happy.
I just meant basically I’m okay but earlier today I wasn’t doing my best. I’m alot better now I just went to work and then was at a friends place for a little get-together to get my mind off things.
BTW joey, how could you not like 90’s rock? I honostly believe, for my taste in music, 90’s rock is the best.
anyways hope your day was good and can’t ait to read all about it :)

Hello Sandy!

“Hey joey, sorry about the late reply again..”

What?

I just logged in today! lol
…let me see…it says “three hours” after your response!
=)

“like I’ll pull up the blanket close to my eye’s but I always peep through to see what happens.”

hahaha
I dont use a blanket, I peek without using anything on my face, I just close my eyes but not too tightly..
lol

“It’s just such a waist if you miss the scary scenes.”

Thats true!

“And damn there was this other scary movie…it was japanese though. I definitly recommend you watching some japanese scary movies. The thing they do are so twisted it’s frightening.”

=O
Dammit Sandy! Names!

lol

You are starting to drive me crazy!

“Though sometimes the “why not” factor kicks in for me and I do enjoy the occational one-night stand.”

=O

The “why not factor”?

=/

This may give a not so good impression of you Sandy, i mean…at least in my eyes. (Not to sound mean though!)

Whatever makes you happy is fine.

“I honostly think that cheating is usually also caused by the “why not” factor. People sometimes just get caught up in the moment. Or other times people are just like that and are unable to stay faithful to their partner.”

Yea, I can agree with that but I add that its also people that basically do not really “love” their partner and are with them out of fear of being alone (insecurity, selfishness, BS).
Sounds harsh though.

“Just enjoying myself, personally not in the best mood right now but I’m fine. “

Sounds contradicting, You OK?

“How are you? I’m hoping all is well and I hope for the best.”

A lil’ sleepy right now (and its only 10:40 pm) Im thinking its because of waking up early everyday for work, but Im good thank you for asking.
Looking forward for the weekend =)

“How about you hun? (music)”

Actually I like most type of music (modern alternative, metallica style rock, a few songs of the hip hop genre, even some relaxing music!)…but idk…Ive been listening to some ‘Armin Van Buuren” techno lately (especially when working out!)
but I do enjoy 80’s stuff also.

90’s not so much.
=P

Dont worry about the delay in response stuff, you know I sometimes delay in my shouts too.

Take care and let me know if you are doing OK.
Good to hear from you Sandy.

=)

Hi Sandy!

“And I won’t cover my eye’s during the scary scenes. “

=O
What?!
I cant believe that!

Was there any movie where you did cover your eyes?

“And sorry, I forgot the name of the movie, but if you ever come across it, it is definitly your moneys worth.”

Boooo!

=(

lol

Im actually looking for “scary” movies that I have not seen yet, thats why I wanted to know.
Sandy, any other one you would recommend BTW?

“I don’t think one night stand are that terrible if both people realise it is just a one night stand and don’t mind it being.”

I say I can’t agree…but I can respect that Sandy. It doesnt make anyone a “bad” person, you know?

Im personally more into having a deeper relationship with a person. I like to take things slow…something like that.

How about you?

“And cheating-though both people may be okay with it just being a one night stand someone is getting hurt. One night stands are viewed as promiscuous but if this is what both people want then whatever makes people happy.”

That I agree with. I think that most cheaters think the person he/she is cheating on will cheat back on them (even if the other person is as faithful as can be), therefore it messes his/her mind up and consequently has a negative effect on his relationship.
He/she becomes more like…possessive, jealous, controlling etc…

Can i have your opinion on that?
=)

“And a french manicure is with the white tips.”

=O
Really?

I like how it looks, I actually prefer that style than the one with designs. It looks simple, nice, and clean.
Is it called the same way when done on your toe nails?

“How are you doing?”

Im good, a little tired from work, thank you for asking. Nothing much has changed, and emotionally Im OK. =)

How about you? How are you feeling?

“Also sorry about the delay in my responce you your last message.”

Sandy, saying that is very considerate of you…

but wait…Am i supposed to get mad? lol

=O

BTW…I just thought of something…are you good with jokes?

“I sent you a message before but I don’t think it was sent properly. “

=O
having to write a shout all over again sucks!
That has happened to me before.

“So I always thot you just haven’t been on help recently to check it. “

=)
Nah…whenever I get the chance to log on and read a response from you I answer back, and since you have shouted yourself before, I sometimes take a quick check to see if you did.
I appreciate the time you take to do it.
Thank you.

Well Sandy, its good to hear from you. Take care of yourself and let me know how you have been doing, OK?

PS:
Tell me another thing…what type of music are you into?

you have the longest shout trail ever and i’d like to tell you good job and keep it up!

HI!

hey!

“If you give me a blanket to hide under during the scary parts I’m good to go.”

=O
No, thats cheating!
Not fair Sandy IF you actually use the blanket to hide underneath it.

“Tell me joey, do you ever scream while watching a scary movie?”

hahaha
holy crap, no.

I can get a little anxious and suddenly jump a bit, but no screaming.

“It’s about some decease that makes everybody blind…But at first they only think it has infected like 50 people so they tramp them in some building but when those people excape they realise everybody is infected and it’s all madness. Great movie, you should definitly see it.”

Crap!
You didnt give me the title to the movie Sandy,
Whats the name!
=O
lol

BTW, rent the “28 days later” and “28 weeks later”, IMO they are worth it.

“But I don’t blame it on myself, I just frustrated by this continious cycle.”

Ah…I understand. Its more like what happens to me when sh!t hits the fan.

“Though sometimes it is hard to let go. I believe one of the hardest things I have ever had to do was let go and move on.”

Yes, I agree, letting go is not easy. But what has worked for me and what I personally do, is distance myself and cut the contact with that other person (once the decision has been made and all “sanely thought options” exhausted). You have to know when to let go Sandy.
Damn is it hard, but whoever knows that you didnt settle for someone out of insecurity, will make you an “emotionally strong person” in their eyes. Its worthy of respect.
To me its an attractive quality to be emotionally strong.

What do you think?

BTW, see…when you said “having to let go and move on”, you just gave me an example of how your actions will say something about you in a non-verbal manner.
And what does “having to let go and move on” mean?
That you were woman enough to understand that it was not right nor beneficial for you to pursue that relationship. You were mature enough to understand and let go. Strong enough to walk through it and grow.
In other words, “Sandy knows, she thinks and can make pretty wise decisions for herself. She is not an anybody, she can feel too much, but is not to be played around with,…” among other things.

That would be an idea about how Sandy may be like, based on an action she took. Its all about stopping and observing for a bit…especially when you find that other person interesting.

“Which honostly I don’t understand why so many guys don’t mind this, a man deserves more then to be that ond night stand that she has just to excape from her boyfriend/husband.”

I personally do not believe in “one night stands”…

Do you?

About your doubt…I believe some has to do with how the woman views life and what type of morals she developed while growing up. It can also have to do with how much she respects herself, how insecure she is and her level of maturity. There may be other factors like : she likes to lie, is OK with cheating, has a clingy boring husband who she just “uses”…etc.

And maybe they are just looking for a “hookup” and both (one night stand guy/cheating wife) are OK with the consequences it may bring?

Whats your take on it?

BTW, some people dont give a crap.
I just hope my next gf passes the “God wants you to see…” tests.
=P

“And got them painted too (just a french manicure).”

So a “french manicure” is filing and smoothing the nails…and painting them one color?

What are other types of manicures? (that you like or do on your nails)?

Im curious, I never knew they were identified by names…
=S

=D

“Anyways I’m doing alright. A friend invited me to a party the night before yesturday so I went there. “

=) Glad to hear that.

“I’m suppose to go to another party/get-together tonight at my friends apartment. He usually throws good parties so I’m hoping it will be good.”

Nice,
let me know how it went.

Let me know how you are feeling also Sandy, you too take care of yourself.

Good to hear from you.
=)

=D

“Hey hun and don’t even worry about it I don’t mind at all.”

That was just in case you get tired of reading…idk, sometimes they turn out somewhat long.

=P

“If I get the opportunity I’ll stay up till 3-4 in the morning. I’m also not a morning person so I like to stay in bed till 1-2 in the afternoon or so, if I get the opportunity.”

Im like that too, but sometimes I can wake up early and still fall asleep very late. Work is what makes me have to wake up early and it sucks when you dont get any sleep!

“I can’t remember stopping a movie before I finished it. Unless I fall asleep.”

You have to be kidding me young lady…
Even if watching them late alone in your house?!
=O

“Oh man joey I don’t even see how you could do that! That’s not being in the movie spirit! You need to watch the whole thing, it’s just not the same watching the last half of it the next day!”

hahaha
Well that Emily one creeped me the f#ck out Sandy! How the hell was I supposed to watch that alone, mega at night in my apt., listening to her screams and demonic sounds?

“BTW have you seen “The Quarantine”…”

Not exactly…I saw REC which was the spanish version of the movie, from where Quarantine was made.
Same story, different actors, different language, still scary!

I didnt stop that one!
=D

“Was that the one where everybody was turning into a zombie and like 10 people or so trapped themselves in a mall?”

Uhh…I think you are talking about Dawn of the Dead?

28 days later:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=eunacl…

eh…that trailer doesn’t show much but I found the movie good.

28 weeks later, which would be the second part of 28 days later:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZwxbTD…

=)

“Staying interested and becoming more attracted to him, bc, usually, at this point the man will start to show his true personality and I usually end up realising this is not what I am looking for.”

When you say “realizing this is not what I am looking for”…is this where you notice the guy is “too cocky, insecure, or clingy”?

You dont blame yourself for that though, or do you Sandy?

Because its better to do what you do (drop it) and not “force” yourself to be with someone you dont “love”.

“Then I get to know his deeper side: who he is as a partner.”

=O
Thats where the true test is at if you plan on having a relationship with that person.

I am glad to see you dont just “look”, you “observe”. Especially when it comes to a guy and your heart is involved.

Stay that way, Sandy.

“I must say Joey, you are quite the catch for any women who ends up with you.”

Thank you, I appreciate you say that Miss Nice-EyelinerEyes.
You know…I cant just give myself to someone I feel does not appreciate things Sandy, and I dont care if she’s the “hottest girl on the planet”. To me, feeling an attraction would be enough to get my initial attention, no need for “Miss Perfect Body” crap…bc I am not perfect.
I would love to be with someone who would help me reach that “be a better person” status, be my other pair of eyes, my baby!, my strength when Im weak, my smile when I wake up, etc…

=D

But thats me.

How about you?

“Just as any man, I also need the man I’m with to be confident.”

Definitely Sandy. You know, it goes both ways too.
BTW, how the hell can you follow or trust your heart to an “emotionally weak too insecure” person?

=S

Sandy, the heart is an extremely fragile/delicate thing…at least mine is. Many people forget that, and when you are with someone, you symbolically have that other persons heart on your hands.

When I see it ain’t going right, or that the other person is mistreating it (heart), I take it back…eventhough I can suffer in the process.

I would like to hear your opinion Sandy…

“Honostly though the hard thing is a man who doesn’t want to “jump” at himself in the mirror…Don’t ask. All I can say is once he said that…It all went down hill.”

Holy crap that made me laugh Sandy.
=D

Sandy + Mirror 1
Dude 0

“the actions you take and the way you react to things also ’say’ (in a non verbal way) things about you” I’ll definitly think about that more often hun.

=)

“And thank you about the “sweetest person on the planet” comment. “

Your welcome, and I was serious…Im not the type of guy that would say something to someone without having a reason behind
it, Sandy. Especially when complimenting!

“And I do have a question for you Joey, why are you still single? You seem like a really nice guy, I don’t see why you haven’t found someone yet.”

Hmmm…You know…I have been asked that before, and Im am not quite sure exactly why, but I do think that some has to do with not finding a “baggage free person”.
Another things maybe is that I dont meet much women either. Third would probably be I take breakups hard, and I take time to “heal my heart” before going into a possible relationship…I make sure I have no baggage, and during the process I wont let a woman in, until Im ready.
Other stuff might be my “self conscious thinking” at times too, idk, i can be hard on myself sometimes. Other stuff can be, “she’s already married, she may be an adult but too young for me, has a long term bf already, lives far, Im not attracted to her, etc..”

eh…

“My day was fine. Got a manicure and had some lunch.”

Im glad to hear you are OK.

Sandy Im curious to know…What type of stuff do you do to your nails? The normal painting of them (one color)? or designs?

IMO, nice nails on a girl is a plus.

How did your day go today?
How are you feeling now?

Let me know.

Nice conversating with you, take care.

Hellooo Sandy =)

Let me warn you that this shout turned out pretty long!
lol

“What does attract a man to a women when still early in the relationship, where they are still just trying to learn the basics of one another?”

I can only speak for myself on this one bc there are so many types of guys out there and most just want a specific thing, and it also depends on what their mindset is, level of maturity, etc…

listen…I have to first “like” the girl (find her attractive), thats the initial thing for me, you know, feel that “wait, I think this girl seems pretty interesting and I find her kinda cute too”, but thats not enough.
I then have to get to know her in order to see if she is even more beautiful on the inside cause if not, I will lose interest OR create a problem for myself trying to make something that will not work, work (when thinking with my Heart, imagining or creating this illusion of ‘her’)…and it will be just a matter of time for the relationship to burst into flames.
I have learned to believe more in “actions”, words are not enough.

Now, the interest has to be mutual, ’cause from there other factors come into play as to “is she considerate? affectionate? does she respect me? whats does she have besides a beautiful body, face, eyes, or whatever I found physically attractive? does she respect my family? are we on the same page? how is she with her family? how does she manage difficult situations? is she patient? psyco? excessively jealous? too insecure? compatible enough? does she care? can she be someone I could live with? is she supportive?” etc…
Did you notice that I dont care if she “cooks for me, cleans the house for me, or does my laundry?” That would be selfish because in my mind a man is supposed to at least know how to clean up for himself. And those are chores that (in the case of both living together or married) should be balanced out. Idk, its the way I was raised.

Keep in mind that these are qualities I personally keep in mind, give, and expect back (being ‘flexible’ of course).
But again thats me, and my mindset, its what I look for.

BTW Let me know what you think Sandy.

Another thing…
A relationship is based on what I call “default requirements” that have to be invested by both partners in order to be healthy, know what Im saying?

For example:
both people that are in a relationship have to be supportive, caring, have respect for one another, interest in each others hobbies, lives, enjoy spending time with one another, listen to each other NO MATTER WHAT, etc…
Thats basic relationship survival. Its something like “natural maintenace” and it should not be stressful nor a problem for any to give out those things, because the “love” you may be developing for that person should be kicking in and making it enjoyable.
When problems arise, both should be mature enough to talk them out and face them before they get nasty and hurtful.
You would want to plant your seeds in good soil to watch a beautiful garden grow, right?

I once heard that “once the respect is lost in a relationship, there is no turning back…it starts going down hill”.

On the other hand, their are exceptions where stuff like low self esteem, “comfort zone”, and no self respect can make someone stay in a nasty relationship, knowing they deserve better.

“And I’m glad you think that way Joey, I’ll try to never let a man think he is better then me.”

Thank you, Im glad you think the same too.

“Honostly though I’m happy single or not, I’d rather be single then let a man screw me over”

Exactly.
Remember that the actions you take and the way you react to things also “say” (in a non verbal way) things about you. They create a reputation of yourself as a person and woman.

“Honostly I don’t know if my inner beauty is that beautiful. I’d like to hope it is..”

eh…idk, but I dont see you as a malicious nor hurtful person. I can bet that if a guy really got into your heart, you would be one of the sweetest person on this planet.

“And aha Joey I found it pretty akward as well when I thought you were serious about going out on a date but don’t worry about it hun, I’ve had way more akward conversations in my life.”

=O
lol

I can imagine, you must be approached by a lot of guys.

“And my self of steem is good. I do have confidence in myself, obviously everybody has their insecurities but I’m pretty happy with who I am.”

I like that.
Im glad you think that way. You most likely irradiate a good vibe.

“And my day was fine hun, dropped by my mom’s and help her do some things. Nothing fancy-was a pretty slow day. “

Thats fine.
How did your day go today?

=)

BTW, did your friend make it to Portugal safely?

“I’m a pretty good thriller/horror movie fan…movies like “The Ring” or “The Grudge” I’m really into.”

Im into them too, but I will let you know something…I have stopped a movie while watching it alone in the dark in my room projected on the wall lol Thats because I usually see them super late at night and live solo’. 0_o
I can bail out on one or another (and watch it another time), one I remember was the exorcism of emily rose, Jesus was I scared! Thats one I remembered I had to stop.
…Yes, alone I can get scared.
=O
haha

How about you? Can you go at it (watch a scary movie) alone in the dark mega late at night?

Oh! How about zombie movies? Have you seen the “28 days” and “28 weeks later” ones?

=P

“And I watched the video you sent me, thanks for sending it to me BTW aha I thought it was pretty funny. “

Your welcome, there are a lot of crazy things on youtube…my nephews showed me that stuff and we were laughing hard at times with vids they showed me. I thought you might like it.

Well Sandy, nice hearing from you. Remember to let me know what you think about that relationship stuff I put at the beginning. If you have any questions about it let me know, I will be more than glad to answer them.

Take care, let me know how you are feeling too.

=)

Time to smile :
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tm6cqp…

Hello Sandy!

“And what do you mean by “Too much too soon?””

That maybe you go too fast? as in: letting your emotions run the show while your mind may tell you another thing?
That maybe you fall to soon for a guy you like but just met?

Something like that.
=)

“Example…Well I’ll meet a guy and at first he’ll seem alright and I feel like I’m finally meeting someone I could fall for but then I started noticing habits…characteristics that gradually but quickly show up. Such as them being too clingy, or too cocky, etc. etc.”

I understand. Never let anyone think he’s better than you and sh!t.

“As if God was trying to tease me with these men.”

lol

You know…Im not much of a religious dude, but when that sh!t happens to me (with women) I see it as God opening my eyes as to how that other person truly is. That is what I call “the test God puts the other person through, for you to see most of his/her true colors”…and based on what you see and feel while that “test” is being put in effect (getting to know each other), you decide whether to pursue the relationship or not.

Im glad you dont go for those type of guys, from my point of view, I see too many people settling for crap.
Being single does suck at times Sandy, i wont lie and I know…but I think that being with someone that would make your life miserable is worse.

What do you think?

“But then some events occured and we had to seperate for sometime and I suppose he lost interest..”

He missed out Sandy. Nobody knows you better than yourself and if you think for a second or two about your positive qualities…I can bet its his loss.

I know you are more than a considerate Help.com user. I can bet that what resides in your heart (for you to give) is way nicer than the pretty effect the eyeliner gives to your eyes or the lip gloss on your lips, or any other attractive physical quality you might have.

Would you agree?

“And yes it most definitly is easy to misinterprate things in text.”

If our convo’s were “spoken”, you would have sensed my sarcasm off the bat!

I found it funny, but actually felt a little awkward when you thought it was serious.

=O

lol

“Joey you are actually right on the dot. I do believe I “get run” by my emotions. And yes I probably do drink a little more then I should.”

Im pretty emotional myself, but I constantly try to control them bc I used to get too emotionally messed up by them.

I personally believe the Heart (emotions/feelings) and the Mind (rational thinking) are 2 different things, and the Heart can be one’s enemy at times.

Can you give me your opinion on that?

BTW Sandy…how is your self-esteem doing?
Im curious to know…

“Yes I am very close with my family.”

Im glad to hear you are close to your relatives, it says a lot. Is your twin sister “identical twin”? or just “twin”?

“Hope you had a good day Joey, tell me all about it. Take care. “

Thank you for asking, but I would like to know about yours too, deal?

Mine:
My day was OK, work.
We also had a little family gathering bc one of my cousins came to visit with his wife and kids.
And finally, I have this semi old projector which I have sometimes used to see movies (projecting them on the wall), and I was with my nieces and nephews watching “The Haunting in Connecticut”. o_O
Kind of a creepy movie, we were watching it in a dark room but they like that sort of stuff. haha

Now Im supposed to go to sleep and wake up at 7am tomorrow for work and its 1:30am. Ive always been kind of the “go to bed late” type, even when I was in school, idk.
=S

Now, how was your day? You feeling OK? let me know about it.

Take care Sandy.
=)

PS:
I dont know if you know what the “WTF BOOM!” is all about, but let me know if you find it funny anyways =P

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ReVIh6…

“And the “Aha do you know?” just meant “Oh so do you think I should take you out?” Not really that meaningful I have to say.”

=O
Thanks for clearing that up.

“Honostly meeting a man I am actually interested is where I come into the crappy luck.”

Too much too soon?

“It seems that there is always something wrong or I just can’t get myself to fall for them.”

Something like what? Could you give me an example?

“1. I believe a relationship should be about two people making the choice to share themselves to one another. They should respect and care for one another. etc. etc. Basically two people making the choice to be with one another. There are also open relationships and etc.”

Sounds like your going the right track.

“2. What I can tell you is what a man should be. A man should be honost. Strong (emotionally). Caring. Have goals in life and actually try to pursue them. He must know how to respect and care for his women. And never think he is any better then she is. etc. etc.”

Good enough.
Have you actually ever dated someone as you describe?

“And I’m sorry joey. Aha I thought you were seriouse about the whole “date” idea I didn’t realise you were being sarcastic.”

Really?

Thats why its so easy to get things misinterpreted in text.

“Me too nice for you? Why do you say that?”

Because I dont think you are a bad person Sandy, I also believe that maybe you get run by your emotions a lot. The only thing I dont personally see as a pretty good thing is the lil’ too much drinking at times. But thats just my personal opinion.

“You seem very nice joey.”

Thank you for noticing, same to you.

“We had a little going away party for one of my girlfriends (she is leaving for a month to visit family in Portugal…”

That was nice, but all the getting sick thing doesnt sound fun. I hope your friend has a nice time visiting her family.

how about you sandy…do you have a good relationship with your family?

“Anyway I’m just about to head out and grab some…well I haven’t had breakfast yet but I guess it’s lunch with my girlfriends.”

=D

“Hope you have an amazing day hun all the best.”

Thank you Sandy.
Take care.