Kalen's profile at Help.com

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Last 7 Posts Authored

• I seem to be having some sort of emotional breakdown. posted (2 years, 3 months) ago
  I have allowed myself to become paralyzed. Perhaps I am withdrawing from my responsibilities out of …

• Big earthquake in Christchurch, New Zealand - all Kiwi helpers check in here so we know you’re safe! posted (2 years, 3 months) ago
  http://www.reuters.com/article/2011/02/22/us-newzealand-quake-idUSTRE71L04320110222 http://www.cbs…

• How can I convert a stereogram to a 3d model? posted (2 years, 4 months) ago
  More specifically, what software can take 2-d passive photographs of a physical object from multipl…

• Resolved; closed posted (2 years, 4 months) ago
  Bricked a newish device; feel upset. I could equivocate and say it wouldn’t really have improv…

• Which Of These Ten Magical Items Would You Choose? posted (2 years, 4 months) ago
  And Why? 1. A pot that can produce 1,000 kilograms of any food a day. 2. A bracelet that keeps wea…

• Closed: Elmo makes a pregnant woman’s day. posted (2 years, 4 months) ago
  Quite adorable, and smile-inducing. I felt like sharing. [youtube:http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cL…

• Closed: Does anybody else hate seeing this on help.com? posted (2 years, 4 months) ago
  [quote]While we try to encourage discussion, we must limit reply lengths, your’s was too lo…

• All Claimed Posts »

Kalen's Top (5) Replies by other users' votes

• (4 votes) Soon to be homeless, no help in sight.
  

  Homelessness is an adventure. Make use of the opportunity to learn as much as you can, and grow as much as you can. Observe. Contemplate. Allow yourself to feel as much self-pity and hopelessness as you want, but understand that that is a choice, and while it can help you to grow a lot, it may not be the thing you prefer to do at this time if you’re approaching things from a conscious state of awareness.
  
  Take stock of the necessities of life. Food, water, warmth, sleep, someplace to pee and take a dump. That’s all you need. If you go to a shelter, be very careful not to allow your identification to be stolen.
  
  It will be best if you do not fall into despair, but rather try to see in your imagination the very likely reality that you will find the resources you need. Fate, God, Life, Providence, Kórima, whatever you want to call it, has a way of getting you what you need - if you trust it, and are active. Visualize things turning out alright.
  
  You sound like a good person. Have you not made any friends who may be able to help you out? If you have any kind of social anxiety, you’re going to need to tell that stuff to wait a minute and you’ll deal with it later. If you will have no place to stay, you NEED to first look to friends. Community is the probably one of the most valuable asset a person can have. So if you don’t have friends, learn to make them, quick. And try to make friends with good people. Best way to make friends is to be one. I know you may feel as though you have nothing to give, being homeless, but you can give of yourself in different circumstances. Small actions of kindness count for a lot.
  
  It may be hard on your pride to ask for help. But you are in need.
  
  Another important thing is going to be your appearance and attitude. Keep yourself looking presentable, and keep a positive attitude. This is going to be even more important than friends. Most of life is filtered by the attitude you bring to it. Only a small percentage is dependent upon the actual situation.
  
  Leverage your intelligence. You’re very analytically minded, yes? While you may not have been able ot market yourself to an employer, there are many ways in this world that you can provide value to others who will be willing to compensate you. Use your imagination.
  
  That’s all I can think of at the moment. Ask questions.
  
  - written 2 years, 4 months ago – voted for by windmills, guitarist2k, Kitten_Ciao, pk4life

• (2 votes) Is there any way I can ‘like’ people’s answers?
  

  Other helpful sites:
  http://www.mahalo.com
  http://wiki.answers.com
  http://askville.amazon.com
  http://www.answerbag.com/
  http://answers.yahoo.com/
  http://questionville.com/
  http://www.blurtit.com/
  http://www.theanswerbank.co.uk/
  http://yedda.com/
  http://simplyexplained.com
  http://www.fluther.com/
  http://www.justanswer.com/
  http://www.askeet.com/
  http://grupthink.com/
  http://www.askmehelpdesk.com/
  http://justcurio.us
  http://www.askpedia.com/
  http://uclue.com/
  http://www.allexperts.com/
  http://itknowledgeexchange.techtarget…
  http://vark.com/
  http://www.answerdigg.com/
  http://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/
  —-
  http://ask.metafilter.com/
  http://www.liveperson.com/
  
  can’t vouch for the quality on all of these. Mahalo is interesting though.
  
  - written 2 years, 3 months ago – voted for by loudsouthf, mindhealer

• (2 votes) My ex girlfriend and love of my life committed suicide.
  

  *hug*
  
  I am not a therapist, counselor, or psychological professional. I am just a mid-20s dude who has been depressed and lethargic and “failing at life” in the past and thinks he has some useful ideas. Some of this has helped me. Some of it may be utter crap. Use your best judgment.
  
  Take some time to really grieve. Bawl your eyes out. Think about all the terrible stuff that has happened and how difficult it has been. Basically get it out and expressed instead of trapped in your mind. We’re looking to create an alternative outlet for this stifled emotional energy that has been until now been expressed through paralysis and drug use.
  It will be painful, no doubt. But it is a necessary prerequisite to get this out of your subconscious and into a tangible form. Write it down in a journal if you have to. Afterward you might feel like crap, but that’s okay because you’ll then move on to step two. It is essential that you do NOT remain in step one for any longer than necessary. Put a time limit on it. Say a day or a few hours.
  
  Step two: understand that we all have within us a spark of Humanity, a quality that allows us to become pretty much anything we dream of. This might sound airy-fairy, but it’s true. You could look at it as a fire that will burn in whatever direction you fan it toward. Even if you can’t feel it right now, it is there.
  
  Consider this statement: “Circumstances don’t matter; only state of being matters. What state of being do you prefer?”
  
  You are responsible for your attitude. only 10% of life is facts, the other 90% is the attitude you bring to the game.
  
  If you choose at this time to experience despair and lethargy, anxiety, or any other “negative” emotions, that is a perfectly fine choice to make. Experience it for as long as you need to. You’re experiencing it for a reason, so perhaps there is a lesson to be learned through this. There is nothing /wrong/ with any of your choices, any of your habits, and anything about what you choose to do.
  
  But understand that you can choose to experience life differently. It won’t be instantaneous by any means. You will likely relapse. Choosing your attitude is like trying a new exercise. It takes time to develop the skill to maintain it.
  
  The first step really is just to be aware of your emotional state. Pay attention. Look at your attitude and how it affects you from an objective standpoint.
  
  I’m not saying that you have to choose to be the happiest guy on the planet, because that isn’t going to happen right off the bat either. But you can choose to see your past as valuable, be grateful for what you have experienced - even the bad stuff - and move on with the next chapter.
  
  Like I said, you’ll probably relapse. Fall back to old habits. Don’t beat yourself up over it. It happens to everybody. Seriously. It will be hard, too. Maintaining an objective awareness of yourself is tricky, and I know I forget to do it. But each time you are able to give yourself a hug and decide to look at the good things in your life, you’ll be closer to being the you you prefer to be.
  
  Oh and don’t try to do too much at once. It takes time to reprogram habits.
  Consider this one, too: “A habit is something you’re not aware you’re doing. Once you’re aware of what you’re doing, it then becomes a choice.”
  
  —
  I hope some of that helps. Take what works and leave the rest.
  
  - written 2 years, 3 months ago – voted for by ~Empress~ Hazelnut, Sans

• (2 votes) Puns for Educated Minds
  

  These are funny. : ) Thanks for sharing them!
  Are #10 and #18 puns?
  
  [quote]Why can’t the Dalai Lama vacuum under the sofa?
  
  Because he has no attachments.[/quote]
  
  Here’s a slightly better (in my opinion) version of the Buddhist puns:
  [quote]What did the Dalai Lama say to the hot dog vendor?
  
  Make me one with everything.
  
  The hot dog vendor said “that will be $2.50″ and the Dalai Lama handed him a five.
  
  And waited.
  
  The Dalia Lama said “Hey where’s my change?”
  
  The hot dog vendor said “change must come from within”
  
  The Dalai Lama admitted this was true, and ate his hot dog, but it gave him bad breath and bothered his sore tooth.
  
  The Dalai Lama then walked to the dentist to get a filling. Although old and frail, he walked often, and he walked barefoot, as evidenced by the thickness of the soles of his feet. It is for this reason he is known as the “super-calloused fragile mystic vexed by halitosis.”
  
  The dentist inspected the Dalai Lama’s tooth, and said he could fill the cavity right then. When he offered to use novocaine, the Dalai Lama declined, saying he wanted to “transcend dental medication.”[/quote]
  Both from here: http://ask.metafilter.com/46763/Know-any-good-Dalai-Lama-jokes
  
  - written 2 years, 4 months ago – voted for by Chunkymoves, Pink Freud

• (2 votes) I feel like there is something so wrong with me..
  

  Drink more water, eat fewer processed foods and more fresh fruits and veggies, get some sunlight, hang around nice and loving people, talk to a counselor or teacher, try meditation, prioritize your goals, do something you love, help people, help people to help other people, ask yourself where the emotions are coming from, and whether they are helping you to be the person you want to be or to achieve the goals you have for yourself - then choose to experience the state of being you prefer.
  
  - written 2 years, 4 months ago – voted for by capsengineer, Lirou

Last 5 Replies – All 1,618 replies »

• Help!
  

  [quote Anonymous]Hi Guys. It thought you’d all like to know that I popped the big question on the weekend and she said yes! I want to thank you all for taking an interest and for helping me swallow nerves and ask her out. What can I say? I’m a happy, happy man. Cheers, Phil.[/quote]
  
  I know I’m late, but I wanted to congratulate you. Congratulations! :)
  - written 1 year, 6 months ago

• I seem to be having some sort of emotional breakdown.
  

  [quote NotJustWhistlinDIXIE]Don’t be hard on yourself, Kalen. Sometimes life can be quite overwhelming, and we ALL need someone to talk to. …Here for you, any time. :o)[/quote]
  
  Thank you. : )
  - written 2 years, 3 months ago

• I seem to be having some sort of emotional breakdown.
  

  Thank you all. I’m sorry I haven’t responded sooner. A friend was helping me out. I appreciate all of your wonderful comments, and I appreciate each and every one of you.
  
  I’m doing better now.
  
  A lot of this has been brought on by school, extra-curricular responsibilities, an emotionally abusive parent, being unemployed and living at home, etc.
  Today I woke up and realized I had forgotten to do two large assignments while I was sick this weekend+, and I freaked out and stayed home. Just sort of cascaded and everything began toppling on.
  
  I do think it would be nice to talk with a counselor. I’m not sure how to set up such an arrangement. Maybe one of the campus academic advisors might have a lead for me.
  - written 2 years, 3 months ago

• I seem to be having some sort of emotional breakdown.
  

  Thank you.
  - written 2 years, 3 months ago

• A girl that I’ve been talking to left a note on my car for me after my track practice.
  

  http://www.punoftheday.com/cgi-bin/disppuns.pl?ord=S&cat=9&sub=0903&page=1
  - written 2 years, 3 months ago

Kalen's conversations are tagged:

friends, Person, Right Now, Feel, Feeling, life, husband, anymore, school, suffering, night, Stomach, hope, relationship, Find, Completely, matter, Situation, boyfriend, kill, stupid, Thought, Issues, Tonight, Terrible