lucy_h's shoutbox - Help.com

Hi,
I invite you to my post..
Your welcome there:

http://help.com/post/329782-if-you-co…

Thanks
have a good day :)

haha, it’s always the funny ones.
I don’t think you can really tell, you just have to know. Like sometimes I can feel it when people look at me x.x

I just need to calm down. As soon as this week is over, I’ll be so so so happy. Idk why but all the younger guys are like into me, and I am so not into that :P

There’s this boy in my french class, and I caught him like STARING at me like intensely (but not creepily) and whenever I talk to him, he looks so deep into my eyes that I feel like he can see my soul…ugh weird, but I like it.

I see my ex’s brother every day, and he used to stare at me every day too, but then I stopped looking back at him, so he probably stopped, idk. I’m being good. But…lol, he has a friend with red hair who is really cute.

I have other guys, but I can’t really think of them right now. haha, I love life.
We had our homecoming a couple of days ago, and this drunk senior came up to me and started grinding with me, and I was like “ew…” lol, but he was really cute. And then I finally danced with this junior boy who I didn’t know…he was really cute though. Oh…but I brought one of my friends from my old school to the homecoming, and the boy from my french class saw us together, and I think he thought we were going out… :(

EXACTLY THE SAME AS YOU!!!
I love school…I was like indifferent about it up until 2 weeks ago.
And I feel ya, everythin is so busy.
Yeah I changed my username because this is what it used to be, but then I chaned it to Singer_Scarlett after me and my ex broke up. I guess I feel more like myself now.
I’m so glad to hear that things are better for you, though. I know how it can be.
Any new guys in ur life? haha I have like 20 xD

Hey Lucy, how’s school?

hello
it has been a long time, lately i have been feeling no emotions at all, oddly enough i have stopped caring over anything. what used to be hate has just turn to acceptance, i stopped caring about what i wanted or needed and i just stopped caring completely. i don’t care care about school (i do my work but when i get shit from my teachers about anything i am brutally honest to them and i have gotten calls home), i have been yelled at by both my parents but their unnecessary screams have done nothing but have me wonder at what point in history has yelling become effective in solving anything, i got with girls but all that has shown me is how little i care about human interactions, i have thrown myself off a cliff to see if i even cared about getting hurt (jacked up both my anckles and even though it did hurt i really dont care about my actions), i have listened to every song on my ipod multiple times looking for something to give me an epiphany and inspire me to want or to care about something.

If im not searching for happiness i cant become sad right?
well that has been an update on my life, feel free to comment on it.

hahaha yea it wasnt exactly for me I guess. I just came across that article in cosmo with my random internet searches and it made me realize that I have a greater expectations of what a nice body is for a man than that of a women and I wanted to verify my thoughts to that of other women. I guess for a nice body I assume “abercombie” body is nice. I don’t necessarily think you have as low of body fat as some of them, but their muscle mass or higher is desirable. Not sure if that makes sense, but I just think its funny when girls think somebody has a good body and they are either too skinny or pudgy.

Me too! I’ve completely stopped fighting it. Like I’m not even depressed….the same thing happened to me last year (or well, I was supposed to switch schools, but I didn’t last minute)..but I mean, you can only fight to a certain point. And maybe this change in school won’t be so bad, you know? I’m just so frickin tired…emotionally I mean. I just don’t have the strength of anything.
What do you mean “check out early”?? You don’t mean like hurting yourself, right??

Don’t worry, there are always good people out there…you just gotta find them. I’m sure there is some good in your school.

NO WAY!!! I’ve been watching trasy MTV shows too!! like room raiders and next and the one where the parents pick out 3 girls…etc. lol, my life is pretty ok..it’s weird…like I’ll be really happy one moment (like now) but then it doesn’t take that much to set me off and get me sad. I think I might be bipolar actually :P

Other than that, I have to keep my emotions inside. is that where emo comes from? like EMOtions? anyway I dyed my hair blackish-red and I got gray contacts, so I’m still getting used to my reflection…haha.

So how’s life going for you?

I just found out that I’m not going to school till the day after my school actually starts…so yeah. I’m a bit worried…

you know that girl that i wanted to kind of wanted to stay away from.

ya her… i dont want anymore drama, do you have any tips on getting over a girl?

And don’t worry, it’ll all work out, I’m sure.

That’ll be like December. Just to be sure. That’s when I’ll start talkin to him…if I feel like it. idk yet.

ok so im having some girl troubles… with my friend
i think i like her again… but i really dont want to

I think that’s a good idea…like being friends with ur ex. I wish I had that opportunity.

So did ur school situation get sorted out yet?

Life. I mean, every fall for the past 5ish years has brought change upon me…switching schools, switching friends, idk how else to explain it. It just sucks, but once it’s over, everything is amazing again.

I think everyone wants to feel wanted. I like having a best friend though, and I usually get along better with guys so my bf ends up being kind of my best friend in the end…well I’m only speaking of one experience, but still, I can see a pattern starting to develop. :P

Exactly! I feel like I’m undesirable, that’s why I like get so happy when I see random cute people smiling at me or whatever, lol x.x

And fall is difficult because it’s the season of change and I don’t really like change that much…but this is for the better, I guess. I dunno. It’s been like that for the past 4…soon to be 5 years.

But oh, I get what you mean about being lonely. It’s weird though cause I don’t want anyone…but I’ll flirt with cuties. Ugh.

yadada? lol wats that mean?

I’m just chillin. i’m gonna be good after Thanksgiving Break…hopefully. Most years it’s like that for me. The fall is the most difficult.

That’s a good idea, but I mean like, don’t hang out with him for a couple of weeks. Like I haven’t talked to my ex in 2 months, and I’m completely fine. Infact, I feel much better. I actually like legit realized what an a** my ex was. Like wow. I can’t believe I stayed with him for so long! Haha, you’ll get through this.

Oh wow, that sucks…just tell him you need some time or whatever. Maybe you two two will work it out eventually? I mean, do you wanna be friends?

9th. You?

Yeah, I can hang out with them whenever. I bought cup cakes to get rid of the weirdness, and it totally worked.

yea I know, weird, lol. Actually I forgot what it was, but you wrote exactly what I was thinking. Then I opted not to reply, then saw another one of your posts and it seemed like a good answer.

right “back” at you. been a pleasure

haha, honestly I just came across some of your replies so people and I liked your responses.

I’m going to go say goodbye to my friends from my old school today, and I’m a little nervous…like it’s weird…I’ve been going to school with some of them since I was in 4th or 5th grade.

We’re only allowed to take AP language as seniors and same for the other AP’s actually, haha. I’m thinkin about taking AP us history just so that I have an AP, but idk.

haha i didnt really all i said was that it isnt my problem whether or not if they believe me, but it is their problem if they make me feel uncomfortable…they made me write a letter saying that what i wrote wasnt true

i wrote a journal from the point of veiw of a someone who hates everything, and it talked about how everyone is worthless assholes who need to kill themselves… not the smartest thing ive done haha

Nope. Which ones are you taking?

hello been a couple days since we last talked, but i didnt have anything to complain about, until today i did a free writing thing in english and we were supposed to write as fast as possible without thinking about how we feel than pass up our journals to the front of the class and another student would read it, and turns out i wrote something that disturbed the whole class and i was sent to the principles office and i had to talk to 3 councelors and none of them even listened to what i had to say, i told them that i just made that up and they wont believe me

I’m having trouble sleeping…insomnia :P
I just don’t want any drama at my new school, but I’m not one of those people who blends in…but I can with effort.

But good that you’re ignoring him. I haven’t had contact with my ex for over a month, and now I’m doing pretty well. It’s kinda awesome.

Are you taking AP’s this year?

Ugh, he sucks. Did you text him back?
And I know how it is. I have to start my stupid summer reading and I’m gonna die x.x
I’m like really gonna miss summer. Wow, it went by so quickly!

School sucks, anyway, how are you doing?

School sucks, anyway, how are you doing?

Nah, I might take an online course if I feel like it, but I’m just gonna study my vocab and I’ll be good. Crap. When does your school start? Mine starts in 2 weeks. I’m freaking out. Like omg.

Holy crap. I just told people from my old school I’m not going back, and it was kinda difficult. I’m scared about the future, but I’ll be fine. I’ll just do cross country and then everything will be fine. haha, the first two months are the most difficult.
Are you takin SAT classes?

I get it, it’s cool.
So how was your day?

Yeah, same here.

haha, so what’s your damage then? (Not that I think anything is wrong with you, lol, it’s just that 99% of the people on here have some sort of issues they’re dealing with)

haha, so what’s your damage then? Not that I think anything is wrong with you, lol, it’s just that 99% of the people on here have some sort of issues they’re dealing with

dont worry about it :)
ya i wont forget it but i guess i will just have to learn from it

i am writing the script now, and i am going to film starting near the beginning of the senior year… it might be throughou tthe whole senior year, because im filming in several locations and i will need to wait for certain weather days, such as rain, cloudy, gloomey…etc.

yep..that is the one

not real young but i met her when i was about 11 or 12 so i knew her for almost 4 years… she was my only friend when i lived in pasadena

ohh thatscool ive never been there but i used to go to san fransico a lot to visit my grand parents

but i was actually thinking of baseing the love interest off of my ex girlfriend, the girl in the movie ends up killing herself and art (feeling he could have saved her) starts to get darker which leads to his suicide attempt.
the girl will be like his childhood friend that he always had a crush on or something and mick endds of convincing art to go after her

hha that is weird where did you used to live?

but ya i am trying to study how my teachers act during certain situations, like in my economics class i act like my character mick to see how he acts towards me… he just ignores me whicjh is exactly what i want him to do, because mick is supposed to be kind of an invisible character… i want to give art a love interest in the movie though

well we had one but our drummer left so we deleted it, but hes back now so we have to make another one

haha i do live in the u.s. and i live in san diego and palmdale, california

so far i working on this by myself, but my friend will probably help me direct, i was hoping to play the role mick, and i was planning on him playing the role art… but usually we just make short videos and we bith act and direct them, we work really well together, and we always have the exact same ideas for how to shoot things

haha sadly the only real way to make a highschool movie is to make it rated r… and show how crappy the teachers are

It’s not what she does…it’s what she used to do. Apparently she’s gotten better according to my brother…but my dad and I have this theory that my mom is bipolar (type 1), so that’s why she does crazy things and lies so much. She did like crazy things when I was younger…like she got paranoid so she took the doorknobs off my door, and she called me a terrible daughter, and she’d go through my stuff and not even try to hide it…haha once she put all my stuff in garbage bags. lol, I thought that was the best one xP Sometimes you just gotta laugh.

Haha, yeah, that’s pretty much how my brother feels with me sometimes. I only act immature around him because I grew up too fast and I never really got to be a child. But now I have Peter Pan syndrome hahaha

I know what you mean :P

Haha, and no, my old school was a boarding school. It’s co ed though, and it’s not that far from where I live, but I board there because my mother takes a tool on my mental health x.x I used to take antidepressants because of her, but I’ve just been so happy in boarding school…I’m kinda worried now, but I’m sure I’ll be super busy so I won’t have time to worry about her.

I act like the younger one sometimes just for fun so that my brother can develop a sense of responsibility, and sometimes he actually comes though. It’s awesome.

I miss being crazy with my friends. This is what sucks about having friends in boarding school…they don’t live close to you AND they’re all seniors, which is even worse @.@

I don’t go to camp either, but yeah, like I mean people like that…like I used to have this friend…and I never got a chance to say a real goodbye to him and I never told him how I felt because I thought I’d see him again too, but I never did. I miss him :( But that’s so cool that you met him over a weekend get away! I’ve always wanted to do that. Oh, that’s totally why I love christmas, because it’s so like romantic and joyous and beautiful. xD

Sorry I’m rambling, haha, but my brother is younger, but by like a year and a half, so we’re like really close. Haha, when we were younger, we used to tell people we were twins lol. I miss him a lot when I’m at boarding school. But 2 sisters?? that’s so cool! I always wanted to have sisters! So you’re the youngest then? That must be nice. I know being the oldest I have sooo many responsibilities it’s just kills me :P

Holy cow! Next week!! :O When do you find out? That’s crazy…don’t worry, I’m sure you’ll be fine though…I’m kinda freaking out though.

you know whaht I hate about summer? The only thing I hate is saying goodbye to everyone. Like camp friends, and people who you’ll never see again, etc etc. I really just hate goodbyes :( It’s just so hard to let go, you know? ugh. This is sad.

But haha, yeah. My brother and I just went out on the playground swings, and it was really fun. I love that boy, but he can be annoying :P Do you have siblings?