You need to stop this right now. You say your brothers death is your fault, and you said the same thing about your mother. What’s wrong with you? You have no control over who God takes and who he doesn’t. So why do you insist on saying that your stupid and everything is your fault? You had nothing do to with them dieing, unless you killed them yourself, and if you did you be in jail right now. Lift up your head, Lisa, and gather some self esteem and courage. Your mother and brother would not want you to do anything foolish. You have your whole life ahead of you, and you need to start thinking positive. One day you will drive, and when you do you can go to where they are buried and plant flowers or a small tree in their memory. This will never be done if you hurt yourself. Think of tomorrow.
I hope you’re doing good. Please don’t blame yourself. I blamed myself too, when my brother died. I was the last to speak to him. I had no clue. I knew he was suffering from a drug problem, we all did. We tried to help him, time and time again, but he just kept going back to that drug….heroin. I felt guilt for a long time. I had no one to talk to. This site wasn’t here at that time. I wish it was. Please, don’t blame yourself. He’s with your mom.