iwansumushu's reply history at Help.com

you’re right. it sure does sound that way.

we’ll see what he says this time. and if he’s secretive, then i know whats going on.

i tried that before we broke up. and he said no and that he wants his privacy.

but now that we’re back together, things are really different. so i guess i could try again.

its possible that you’re brains will be eaten.

that’s what my mother has always told me.

but that’s where im having the issue. because im sure if something were going on between them he’d be cautious about me looking over his shoulder. and i feel like i can tell whenever he’s done something wrong and gets caught. he gets angry and defensive. and that wasn’t the case at all.

so it could all just be a misunderstanding. and i don’t want to end things if that’s the case.

so i guess i should talk to him some more about it.

i sure have. it isn’t fun.

but hopefully they’ll knock you out and give you some vicodin afterward like they did with me.

that makes it a little better.

[quote theoratica]Can I ask you who ended the relationship? My ex-gf and are still friends and talk, I talk to her as always and that’s because I want her back. It’s clear that he’s thinking about you.. and maybe he doesn’t have a girl friend, if he hasn’t talked about her, how do you know?[/quote]

well, he broke up with me. about 2 months ago.

and i know he’s dating this girl because some friends of ours told me. he started dating her though, before we became friends again.

[quote Xeno Dragon]If it’s causing you pain, then it’s not love.

Don’t spend a lot of time alone, because all you’ll do is think about him. Hang out with friends, get another boyfriend, go out in public, whatever, but don’t isolate yourself.
Other than that, time. You’ll get over it eventually. Just ride it out.[/quote]

don’t get another boyfriend. i’ve been there and done that before too. a rebound only masks how you feel.

im sure what you want is to feel the happiness that you felt with your boyfriend again, and that wont happen if you rush right into another relationship. you’ll just be comparing everything about the new boyfriend to the old one. and it wont go anywhere.

trust me when i say i knew you’re pain at one time. i’ve gone through it twice with the same guy.

but it doesn’t last forever either and it can only go up from here.

i guess for me it was easier the second time around.
but what helped me the most was to just flood every ounce of my life with something to keep me busy. i worked a lot, went out with friends, picked up new interests and took my life one day at a time.

with time, i started feeling better about myself. i went with friends to parties and other little things. i’ve made a lot of new friends and done things that i’ve never done before.

you need to give yourself time to grieve, and mourn the loss. but don’t soak in it.

once you gain the acceptance that things happened how they were meant to, you feel amazing. i can only tell you this from experience.

i wish you the best hun.

i dunno, this was the second time we had broken up. and the second time around was a lot easier than the first.

i guess i just kept telling myself that if we got back together it would never be the same anyways. no matter how much i wanted it at the time, there would be more fights and jealousy spawned over the breakup. i knew that if we were to be together again, it would be only a matter of time before it happened again. and i had to decide if it was worth it to possibly put myself through that again or not.

i hope you figure things out alright.
this break up changed my life substantially. and im actually content with the course of events my life has taken. i hope you can feel the same about yours soon enough.

you cant do anything.
its all up to him to move on.

but he will never forget her. she was a person in his life, for a while.

but it is a good idea to make sure you’re not just a rebound. how long ago did him and his ex break things off?

i dunno…i have the same problem.

stress?

im not really stressed right now, but food just doesn’t sound good anymore.

you’ll be fine if you force yourself to eat little things throughout the day..like crackers and fruits. and drink a lot of water.

uhm…we were together for 4 years. i lost my virginity with him. and grew up with him.

but thanks for your attempt at helping me. i kinda figured everything out on my own anyways.

i don’t know what you just said.

sure there’s lots of guys at parties, so the chances of ‘meeting’ one there are pretty high.
but the chances of them wanting anything more than a one night stand are pretty slim..

but other social gatherings, where alcohol levels and sexual tension aren’t so high, are good places to meet people though.

try concerts, or a more casual party with no alcohol and just a few people.
also…make more friends. because when you meet new people, they have other friends you can get to know as well. and there’s a 50% chance that some of their friends are guys.

may i ask the anonymous poster why they are so desperate to meet a guy?

i can tell you where not to meet guys.

parties. that would be a mistake and a half. unless you aren’t looking for anything serious.