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• Hi guys, posted (8 months, 1 week) ago
  I’ve never posted here before, but I could really use some help. I’ve been in a relation…

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• Help!
  

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  - written 8 months, 1 week ago

• How do I get over bullying?
  

  I was bullied a huge amount as a child as well, and a short time ago my parents divorced, both of whom were emotionally and physically abusive. I’m just telling you this so that you know I sorta have an idea of where you’re coming from, and that I’m not just spouting off at the mouth. ;)
  For me, getting over various fears ending up being a bunch of mental tricks I taught myself; I don’t know if these will help you, so sorry if they don’t!! My shrink didn’t teach them to me, they’re just things that I taught myself.
  1) Fear of men; I had this HUGE a few years back, to the point where meeting a guy I didn’t know would reduce me to tears. This is going to sound stupid, so don’t laugh, okay? But I hated the pills I was put on for my nerves, and I found this helped:
  Elmer Fudd. You know, from Bugs Bunny? Or any equally unthreatening cartoon dude. Every time I’d meet a guy, I’d make myself picture myself talking to Elmer, like, in place of the guy I was meeting in real life. It takes alot of practice, and a good imagination, but it worked better then my pills.
  2) Bullying: Bullying is one of the most awful things you can go through; people can be so cruel, especially younger people. I never completely got over the effects of bullying, I don’t think anyone really does. But as an interesting side note; I’ve talked to alot of the people who bullied me while I was in middle school, and most of them now deeply regret it, and I’m friends with alot of them. You can’t always change the people around you. Don’t hesitate to go to a guidance councilor or principal in your school; I know you think that will only make it worse, but mostly, it won’t. Most people, if they knew how depressed and hurt you were, would not want to make things worse. Alot of people who bully others don’t understand how deep their impact goes.
  If you don’t feel comfortable with that, you can try confronting them personally; sometimes just telling a person “what your saying isn’t really fair” can work. But alot of the time, it won’t. Again, that’s why a councillor is a good idea; people are more likely to listen to a mediator then to a victim.
  If that doesn’t work, you’re only other option is to be as friendly as possible. I know this sounds stupid, but it’s actually how I got people to stop bullying me; a person just looks like an idiot when they make fun of the nicest, friendliest person in the school. I don’t mean kiss ***, I just mean make yourself a genuine friend to everyone. This can take alot of confidence, I know, which brings me to…
  3)Anxiety: ….yeah. My biggest advice here? Act like you’ve got balls of brass. I used to get panic attacks so bad I couldn’t breathe, until my bf told me “Just picture someone really confident, like from a movie, and act like them.” Angelina Jolie is a personal fave of mine. And if you’re focusing on trying to copying her mannerisms, you end up focusing so hard that you don’t have enough energy left to be anxious.
  I don’t know if any of this helps; I know everyone’s different, and while these worked for me (I’m off my meds now!) they may not be right for you. But if you ever want to talk, my email is on my profile page, and I’ll do all I can to help.
  Sorry this was so long,
  Krissy
  - written 8 months, 1 week ago

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