straywolf's reply history at Help.com

Hello friend:
I feel sad that you encounter people like that, but such is the world. You will not (nor ever) make everyone happy, nor everyone respect you. What is important is that YOU are happy and that you have respect for yourself. Re-read southern comfort’s advice, because this is the reality of our relationships with the rest of the world: We have no control over what others feel (or say) about us, but we have control over our own feelings.
Still, there are many people out there who will respect and love you for who you are. Seek them out and leave those who don’t behind.
I wish you all the best,
straywolf

Many people, including myself can say we have all been there. Under “quotes”, you wrote “someone had to dig the hole I’m in.” My young friend, if you find yourself in a hole, stop digging. I know, I know. Easier said than done. After you stop digging, you climb out of it.
The act of loving, that is ‘true love’ means expecting nothing in return. If you really love her, there will be no conditions (that means you don’t expect for her to love you back.) Who says you should stop loving her? You shouldn’t. But you should stop expecting that since you love her, she should love you back. True love is giving, not taking. So you must give her the options to choose. Choose to be with you, or someone else, or even no one at all for that matter.
I agree with cmtheisen. You sound like one cool guy; compassionate, gentle and incredibly special. Someone will come along who will make this girl look plain. You must be patient but also be available. Best regards.

Dear Boutocrack:
I am sorry that you are in this predicament. I agree with most replies stating that counseling is an option. However, is he willing to go to counseling? When you say he is in love with someone else, do you mean that he doesn’t love you anymore? I could offer better options if I had more info. Best regards, straywolf.

Hello again, Hollister1:
I feel your pain. As I wrote earlier, a part of you doesn’t want to let go. (That’s why you’re allowing him to flirt with you.) But this is not pure love. Pure love is letting go. Love doesn’t take, it gives. If you want to take (his love), then it is conditional love. If this boy did not have the qualities you found beautiful, you wouldn’t even give him the time of day. Think of it this way: What if this guy looked like someone else, someone not so good-looking. WOuld you still fell the same. I doubt it.
I am sorry you feel that he is the only one for you. He is not. Believe me. You will find someone in the future. But you can only find this future someone if you let go of the past.
Best regards…
straywolf

Hello Hollister1:
One of the most painful things in life is letting go someone. The truest love is to give, not to take. If you really love this guy, then you will give him his freedom- freedom to be alone, or even freedom to be with someone else. It is a very hard thing to do. But when you finally say, “I release you because that is how much I love you,” then you will feel a burden lifted. WIll it hurt? Of course. There is no separation without pain. But in time, you will look back and know that what you did is right. Instead of tormenting yourself with what you can not receive, why not give to him what you can, and that is your pure love.

First, prep the wall to make sure it will take your paint well. Paint wall (cream or white) Let Dry.
2. Outline the bricks with a pencil. (You may use a real brick’s dimensions for this.) Ordinarily, a brick is 8 by 4 inches. So pencil a grid of 4×8 squares. Make sure to stagger them, and to leave a 1/2 inch gap between.
3. Using painters masking tape, mask the ‘grout’ lines. It’ll be a lot of tape and a lot of work.
4. Using roller, paint a dark red color as base.
5. Wait for base to dry. WHen dry, get sea sponge and stipple with glaze of lighter and darker shades of red.
6. Remove tape, touch up cream or white with small brush.
Hope your project turns out well!