As far as you losing your morals, this happens when you are young. When you are young, it is easy to develop high morals because you are not tempted to do any of those things. So then it is easy to say, “I’m not going to do that, and I’m not going to do that and I’m not going to do that either. But when you get older, you have different views of these things, and they don’t seem as bad, because you understand them in a different light than you did then.
Even some adults do this. Someone may think that copying music CD’s is wrong because it infringes on the rights of the artist, and copying CD’s happens to be something they have no interest in doing at all because they never did it and don’t think they ever will. But when they get into computers, and learn how burning a CD works, and how nice it is, they start doing it. They copy CD’s for their special “other” and seem to forget about how wrong they used to think it was.
Like I said, it is easy to have morals about something that doesn’t interest you anyway - it’s easier to see straight that way, but when things change and you take an interest in that thing then you start to think, “Oh, what the heck. This isn’t really so bad. Everyone does it (or whatever). The Bible tells us that the human heart is decietful, and desperately wicked - who can know it? That means that we lie to ourselves. For example, a high class “escort” may look down from the penthouse of her client at a prostitute working the street corner below. She may say to herself, “That’s not what I am! I’m not a hooker. What I do is different”. Yeah, right. Or maybe a married man has a close female friend at work. They even have a little kiss now and then. And he tells himself, “This isn’t cheating on my wife, I just have a close friend that happens to be female. What’s wrong with that? Just because I’m married doesn’t mean I can’t have female friends.” Of course, he ends up getting her pregnant and then there is no denying it - he had a girl friend all along! He lied to himself until it was too late and he committed adultery and ruined his marriage.
That is how our heart works - it is deceitful and desperately wicked. It can’t be trusted. It is very hard for us to get a good grip on true morals when we are faced with temptation. Oh the excuses we make, and the lies we like to believe! When we have no interest in doing something, when it just isn’t our cup of tea, then we can see clearly and say, “Oh, that’s wrong! I’ll never do that.” But later, if we do find we are interested in doing that thing, then it just doesn’t seem so bad anymore, you know, after all……..
Keep in mind that your acceptance by God and your salvation rests solely in your union with Christ. And also remember that God chose the foolish things of the world, and the weak things and the base things and the despised things of the world God has chosen. So it looks like you made a good candidate for salvation - congratulations!
You can do all things through Christ. That is what prayer is for. You should pray about everything you do, and take all of your situation to God in prayer. Whenever you are about to do something, like help someone, pray about it first. Ask God to direct your steps, and to teach you how to do things right. In everything you do, you should be powered by prayer.
It will take some time, but don’t be discouraged. God has a perfect plan for your situation, so know that all of this is in God’s hand according to all that He has planed for you. As a Christian, you have to grow, and through that growing process God will be forming and shaping you the way He wants, and most of all, you will be developing a relationship with God through Christ. An that’s where it gets good. So you are on course and on time, and at least that is one thing that you are doing right - thanks to God.
And that is how it always works - “thanks to God”. When it’s all said and done, you will be one glorified creature, as the Bible tells us: A glory yet to be revealed. You are going all the way to the top, so hang in there.
You either have some form of psychosis or else you are being messed with by demons (i.e. evil spirits, fallen angels). Now, if you do go and see a professional, what do you suppose he/she is going to say? That, yes, you are suffering from demonic harassment or alien abduction? Of course not, such things are not even in their purview. They will simply find some psychosis to stuff your symptoms into and then call it that.
Frankly, if you think these are aliens from outer space that are bothering you then I would say you are just being duped. These are “aliens” from the spiritual dimension, evil and wicked spirits that are seeking to possess your body, to push yourself, your soul, into a tiny corner of your being and hold you captive there while they possess your body. To become like that would be your eternal damnation. You are under spiritual attack, and it is for your very life - both now and for the world to come after death.
So it’s either the above or else just some form of psychosis (or both - evil spirit can work within a psychosis). In any case, you seem to feel that you know what is happening is REAL. And it probably is, I would trust your feelings in this case since demonic possession is very real and not all that uncommon. But like I said, if you go to a professional they will automatically fit your symptoms into some known category of psychosis, thus misdiagnosing your state of affairs and keeping you in darkness as to the real problem.
Here is a reference to shed more light on what you may be experiencing:
Hostage to the Devil, by Malachi Martin
ISBN # 0-06-097103-7, Harper & Row Publishers.
The back of the books says:
HOSTAGE TO THE DEVIL is the classic work of the twentieth century on the subject of possession and exorcism. Although not written from a strictly scientific perspective, without Dr. Martin’s pioneering and remarkably thoughtful portrayals of cases of spiritual affliction, it is extremely doubtful that scientists would ever have begun to examine such a dangerous but important subject for another hundred years. Science - particularly the science of psychiatry - and many suffering patients owe this book a deep debt of gratitude.
- M. Scott Peck, author of The Road Less Travelled
And just so you know, although this book is written by a Catholic theologian, I don’t at all endorse the Catholic system. If you do seek out a church, I would suggest one of the Protestant denominations.
It IS cheating in one’s heart and that’s what matters - not if he doesn’t actually do it. There is no such thing as imagining doing something with someone and not actually doing it, except that you are restrained by some reason. In other words, to think it is to do it, and you would do it if the conditions were right (if you could get away with it and the fantasy was available to be played out).
Imagine if you could lay back in a recliner chair with a special helmet on your head. This helmet has a data cable coming out of it and is plugged into a computer. This helmet allows the computer to import sights and sounds and smells and feelings directly into your brain. So now you have a simulated reality system, where you can play any simulated reality video right in your head, like a porn video, and you can partake in the video just like in real life. Now you can do whatever you want with the other person in the porn video, and you can’t tell the difference between this simulation in your head and reality.
Now, if your man was wearing this helmet and playing that porn video and was doing whatever he wanted with the porn star in that video in his head, and it all seemed so real that he couldn’t distinguish between that and real life, would that be cheating? After all, it’s all just imaginary!
So what is the difference between that and just using your vivid imagination? It’s exactly the same principle. And what is the difference between the helmet simulation and real life? Just the consequences? The truth is, if your man would fantasize about porn, then he WOULD use the helmet if it was available. And if he would use the helmet, then he WOULD do it in real life - if the consequences were removed. This is because it is all the same thing - cheating in the heart and that is where it all begins and that is what it is all about, regardless of how far you are ABLE to take it.
Matt 5:27 -
“You have heard that it was said to those of old, ‘You shall not commit adultery.’ But I say to you that whoever looks at a woman to lust for her has already committed adultery with her in his heart.
Perhaps if you had some kind of bed that would slowly change your position as you sleep, like maybe raise and lower the top half of the bed and / or rotate the bed from side to side. And your head and feet can be raised and lowered to alternately stretch and compress your back to varying degrees. This would be done slowly so as not to wake you. The gradual change of position may keep the pain from building up and waking you.
I would imagine that such a bed would have to be custom made. Or maybe it would be easier to design some type of inflatable pillows that you lie on and they inflate and deflate gradually to change pressure points, etc. Or maybe some type of vibrating device attached to the point of your spinal injury which automatically vibrates at different intensities and at certain intervals and patterns to keep the pain at bay. In addition, maybe heat and cold could be applied alternately as well. But again, such systems would have to be custom designed and experimented with.
What about different sleeping positions? Like sleeping standing up while strapped to a flat board, and maybe with some of your weight supported by straps under your shoulders or legs. Or sleeping on your stomach such that your feet and head are both down, such that your body forms an upside down “U” shape, then have the bed slowly straighten out to a flat shape then back again 2 or 3 times every ten minutes.
You could try a combination of these ideas. In any case, it will take some experimenting and fine tuning to see what works best. - written 1 week, 5 days ago
You better check with God. You should be able to hear from God and know if what you are doing is OK with Him or not. Seek God about it and ask Him to let you know if there is anything wrong with it. If you have earnestly sought God and haven’t “heard” anything from Him about it, and you have a clear conscience concerning the matter, then I wouldn’t worry.
Your fantasy, if you were to actually do it in real life, isn’t anything wrong. However, I would be on guard in the fantasy department and make sure that things stay that way. - written 2 weeks, 4 days ago