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• I think I’m crazy.
  

  I’ve learned that life is a process of decisions; make the wrong one and sooner or latter it will haunt you. I had a great job and was engaged to a great girl, I didn’t know it at the time, I took her for granted. She tried her best to keep me happy but I constantly thought the grass was greener on the other side. We had a beautiful baby boy named Liam. He only stopped smiling and laughing when he was hungry or needed a change. My great job moved to Mexico and the reality of my troubled youth caught up with me. I used to skip class which was the precursor to somewhat of a crime spree that landed me in jail a few times. Now with the loss of this great job, that I have no idea how I ever landed in the first place, was gone and the reality of background checks made me virtually unable to find a job even half as lucrative, which put a damper on my relationship, in addition to my infidelity. My fiancé finally couldn’t take me pushing her away and left with my son. This moment being the pinnacle of my depression, I tried to slam a bottle of tylenol P.M’s but it didn’t work, just damaged my liver! I got the attention I wanted tho. I was committed for a week, did’nt get to see my son still, and everybody and their mother thought I was a whack job! I started drinking too much, lost a few other decent jobs, had to move back home! Main point of all this; I bent over backwards trying to get out of a relationship because I was shallow! It’s been 5 years since we split and I have yet to find a women that can hold a candle to her! I temporarily ruined her life and have been kicking myself ever since! My depression is so great right now I can’t even get out of bed to eat! Don’t fret; one wrong decision didn’t get me here! It was a 5 year span of bad decisions. People make mistakes and they fall. All you can do is get up n move on! You are a good person with smarts! Just take one day at a time and do the right thing every chance you get. Whatever you do, don’t start ditching school! I found that after all this it makes me feel good to help others! Maybe you have a family member that needs someone too lean on! It may help! In the end; family is all we have!
  - written 2 years, 7 months ago

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depression