nainachick's profile at Help.com

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Last 7 Posts Authored

• This is about my 6 yr old son. posted (3 months, 4 weeks) ago
  I need help or suggestions on how to help him stop peeing and pooping in his pants. His potty tra…

• Is forgiveness really necessary in order for healing to take place? posted (4 months, 3 weeks) ago
  I used to think so without question, but now I’m not so sure. There is a current post related…

• What has been the biggest problem that you have overcome? posted (5 months) ago
  How did you do that? I think it would be a great reminder for everyone to know that you CAN overcom…

• I am so angry I could spit! posted (1 year, 3 months) ago
  This is continued from my last nights rant about not taking any more sh1t and abuse from my sister.…

• I feel betrayed, confused and loney. posted (1 year, 3 months) ago
  I am at my parents home for the weekend, and I am hurt by my mother. I have a terrible, abusive rela…

• I need to vent a bit. posted (1 year, 3 months) ago
  Tonight is the 3rd meeting for my daughter’s 1st communion. I really dislike these things. I …

• I finally was brave enough to put my picture up. posted (1 year, 3 months) ago
  Now I’m really out there. you all know what I look like now.…

• All Claimed Posts »

nainachick's Top (5) Replies by other users' votes

• (2 votes) I’m really very discouraged right now.
  

  I think you answered your problem in the first few lines, but didn’t know it. Do you know what Karma is? It is what we put out, comes back to us.
  You have listed years worth of injury and grief, as though it was all happening to you RIGHT NOW. That tells me one thing, that you haven’t dealt with the emotions of it, and you are still living in the pain of it as though it were happening right now. It is not. You have listed a few really great things, but have refused to acknowledge them as being blessings, taking them for granted.
  It is true that there have been several tragedies in your life. There have been tragedies in alot of lives. It is what you DO with your laundry list of woes that counts at this point. And you are using them as an excuse to give up. “It’s too hard! I can’t go on” is NOT a good life choice.
  I do not tell you this to anger you, to shame you, or to do anything other that to show you where I see you living. I can see it because I wasted YEARS of my life living in that kind of victimhood, and all I got was sicker and sicker. I could give you my laundry list, but that could just end up being a pi$$ing contest of who had it worse.
  Needless to say, we all get something to bear in this life. It sucks. But you cannot let it ruin you. I still have to make frequent gratitude lists, to get myself back on track. But in the end all I really get a say over is 1.) how grateful I am and 2.) if I can accept where I am at and deal with reality.
  Keep in mind acceptence doesn’t mean I have to like where I am at, it’s just an acknowledgement of truth, so I can at least act based on truth.
  So my acceptance can look like this : “ok, it is true that many crappy, awful, terrible things have befallen me in this life. I didn’t ask for many of them, and was completely unprepared on how to deal with them. HOWEVER I can chose to be grateful today that I can walk, I can work, I have food in my fridge, and a roof overhead. And things can ALWAYS be worse. You might have not even had that pizza on Thanksgiving, it might have been half a rotten sandwich out of a dumpster.
  Look for the blessing and the blessings appear. Look for the crap, and guess what? You see that too.
  
  - written 3 months, 3 weeks ago – voted for by Renegade_007, melt

• (2 votes) My wife and I once were partying with a couple of friends
  

  Marriage is monogamous for a reason. There exists a sacredness in a marriage. Once that has been violated, it is REALLY difficult to get that back, if it is at all possible. Your marriage is broken. How you feel about your wife, and how she feels about you is broken. If you have any hope of ever having a sacred relationship, you need to stop doing what your heart is telling you you must not ever do- that is to invite others into your marriage. Your heart screams at you that it is wrong, and you have to listen to that. Seek counselling, and begin to heal. If you both stay committed to it, you have a chance of staying married.
  
  - written 3 months, 3 weeks ago – voted for by Renegade_007, s.re

• (2 votes) Ok, so recently I took a liking to yaoi, shōnen-ai, gay fan-art to be frank.
  

  The only things in my life that I ever regretted was the times I betrayed myself.
  
  - written 1 year, 5 months ago – voted for by Noctua, zeldafreak199

• (1 vote) I am too depressed because I was not promoted.
  

  sometimes not getting our way turns out to be the best thing that ever could have happened to us. I can’t help but remember all the people who missed their bus or train the morning of 9/11. Or the guy that got fired from his job 2 weeks before, and his office was on the 92nd floor. These are things we can see, but there are so many we can’t. Every time I am stuck in traffic,I may be being saved from some horrible crash just up the road. The same truth can be applied to difficult circumstances in my life. I can’t see why this is happening right now, and I may never know, but I have to stay open to the possibility that it may turn out to be a really good thing.
  My husband bid on a job in our home town. We both wanted to move back there so badly, having no family here where we currently live. He had seniority, the right skills, it looked like a lock. But he didn’t get it. He was devastated. I cried. It felt like a sentance being stuck here. But if we had moved, I wouldn’t have found out about a major health problem, and we wouldn’t be living in the city that has the doctors that treat it. My husbnad also got a WAY better job, and we’re making more money than we ever could have made in our old home town.
  Stay positive. Keep your chin up, and keep looking for the blessings.
  
  - written 3 months, 4 weeks ago – voted for by yadavbangera

• (1 vote) Amzing grace says: twaz grace that taught our hearts to fear.
  

  The word fear, as in the song, can be better understood as the word ‘awe’ or to be in awe of life, or God. It’s a state of humble gratitude. Not anxiety.
  Did you know that fear is a coward?
  
  It’s always hiding around the NEXT corner. As soon as you gain the courage to face it, it runs to hide around the next thing. So you never actually have to face it.
  
  Courage, as well, is not the ABSENCE of fear, rather it is having faith in the FACE of fear.
  
  - written 4 months, 2 weeks ago – voted for by ♥MAD.Hatter♥

Last 5 Replies – All 1,529 replies »

• Ok so I’m going to Hawaii and I need swimsuit help.
  

  you can get suits that have support panels built into the tummy. Also finding a suit that has roushing(sp?) which is a cool bunching effect, a good pattern, or looks like a wrap suit(crossing over the bust, and ending at each side) will help high a paunch as well.
  - written 3 months, 2 weeks ago

• I am consumed by my eating habbits.
  

  I can relate completly to your troubles. I have been a binge eater since I was 2. It confounded me why I couldn’t stop. I also became a bulimc in the process of wanting to lose weight. I’ve been going to Overeaters Anonymous for 5 years now, and I beleive it has saved my life. I have not binged or purged in 4 years, and the understanding and support I found there has been unbeleiveable. I hope this helps. It was the only thing that ever offered a solution for me. Go to www.oa.org to find a meeting in your area. Good luck.
  - written 3 months, 2 weeks ago

• HELP PLEASE!
  

  sounds like you know what you should be doing, but you’re just waiting for someone to give you permission to do it. The basic fear of letting this relationship go is that you wouldn’t be able to find anyone else, or anyone better. That you don’t deserve better. I’m here to tell you that you CAN find someone WAY better, and you deserve better.
  We teach people how to treat us. I love that old saying, ‘no one can climb on your back unless you bend over” By allowing this treatment from him is the same as saying that it’s ok with you, you’ll take it.
  I also feel it’s best to beleive that you’re mother has your best interest at heart. You KNOW she loves you,…this guy I’m not so sure.
  - written 3 months, 2 weeks ago

• Feeling Unloved.
  

  I found, in my experience, that I do not feel fulfilled unless I have some kind of personal connection with a God of my understanding. and I will seek to fill that lack with all sorts of things that aren’t good for me if I don’t have a connection, i.e. spending money foolishly, poor relationships, etc. There are a thousand things a person can try in avoidance of a personal relationship with God.
  I pray daily, and meditate often. I’m not some monk, walk around with prayer beads all the time, it’s just become a working part of each day for me. Then I no longer feel that lack. I don’t know how it works, I just know it does.
  - written 3 months, 3 weeks ago

• How many people here are adults?
  

  well, I have a kids, a husband, a mini-van and a mortgage. I guess I qualify. hehehe!
  - written 3 months, 3 weeks ago

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