daisey1974's reply history at Help.com

Hmmm….sorry to say this dear but it sounds like he wasn’t interested. I would move on.

Hmmm….do you over think and question yourself on other things, or is it just with relationships? Some times the questions aren’t coming from us, but other people. Like we know how this person or another would react and we have their voices in our head.

Hun, they might not be happy now that you spilled the beans per say, but now your friend will hopefully get the help she desperately needs. Some day she will be glad you spoke up. You absolutely did the right thing and you are to be applauded for being so brave.

It doesn’t sound at all like your anorexic. Like Daemon said, it’s probably stress. This is a safe place, and we’re here to help. So whats bugging you sweetie?

You are welcome. And what is with ^^^^^? Huh? you talking about me? Bleh to you. But seriously, what Dr. Ralph just said is true; ive seen some women with men and found myself wondering how in heck did that happen. Be fun to be with and somewhat outgoing, or have interesting things to say.

Oh dear. Honey it sounds like you are over thinking things. The first thing i wonder is if this ever questioning yourself is something developed from childhood. Maybe you should see a therapist about this. It could be a deep seeded problem that won’t go away by itself. I think you get disappointed in yourself because you didn’t act, and this has nothing to with chasing a girl. You don’t have to chase her to make your feelings known. I would get to the bottom of this before trying again with a new girl. Good luck sweetie.

[quote eva.connecte]Firstly, well done for coping so well and going in the right direction; college is definitely a step in the right way for better opportunities. I know how you feel, my parents pretty much hate each other and are still married! The best thing to do is realise that it’s not your fault or problem. You’re the child in the situation and your parents should be the ones taking the responsibility and caring for you - not the other way around. It’s not at all fair in the way your mom’s guilt tripping you, and maybe the best approach is honesty. If she always tells you how awful a mother she is, maybe instead of reassuring her, tell her how you feel and that she would be a better mother if she stopped making you feel guilty, or took therapy classes so she can deal with her depression alone instead in front of you. Maybe have a proper sit down with the parent you think is the more understanding/approachable and discuss how it isn’t fair on you or your other siblings and how things should change. Also talk about your sister’s addiction to help her. If your parents still aren’t listening to you, it can be very frustrating, and if the situation doesn’t improve, maybe you could find an ‘alone place’? Such as a field or a small café where you can go and have time for yourself. Remember you can talk to a trusted adult or relative too to explain the situation isn’t improving. Don’t think that you’re the one who needs to make the problems go away; that’s your parents responsibility, it’s just, unfortunately, some people are in situations we can’t change.
Personally, I work hard so I can get into university so I know that the future is different.
Hope any of this helped![/quote]

YES! It’s not your responsibility to fix your family. They are the adults here, not you. None of this is your fault or the fault of your siblings. And the family member(s) who said it was inconsiderate and just plain ignorant of the real situation. I agree wholeheartedly with eva.

Honey you need to tell someone about this. Don’t just treat the symptoms, treat the cause. This is not acceptable from anyone. You do not deserve to be treated in such a disrespectful and vulgar way. Your parents are responsible for you and your well-being, and it seems to me that they are failing miserably. Especially when and if they know whats going on. Please tell someone whats happening. Get help.

A lot of times mental and psychological issues can manifest themselves physically. I think that’s why you’re experiencing these physical pains. Your emotional problems are being ignored by those who should be the very ones doing something about it to help you be the best version of yourself. You can not afford to just go on like this anymore sweetie. Talk to someone you trust. Maybe a teacher you’re close with, or the school nurse. But don’t continue going it alone.

Oh goodness. Is there an adult you trust? Maybe a counselor or someone that could maybe get them in touch with someone who can help? This is a serious problem, as you are well aware, and it may be too much for you to handle alone. Good luck sweetie.

Sounds like self-destructive behavior. Maybe you should ask yourself where this comes from. It could be a deeply buried programming from childhood. I suggest talking to a good therapist.

She has access to a computer because of public libraries. Sweetie, a shelter is probably the best right now, and maybe they will have programs you can get into to help you get on your feet.

Maybe, maybe not. i do suggest you start facing the possibility that he may not want to be with you anymore. It’s not your fault if that is the case, it’s just people change. Just let him think about it on his own, don’t talk for a few days, let him figure out his feelings. Don’t pressure him to talk about it, when he is ready he will come to you.

Honey, you have done nothing to make it like this. People change and when that happens sometimes what they want changes too. Yes, give him a little space. It’s not your sole responsibility to do anything to get back to where you once were, he’s in this too. If he wants to stay with you, he will find a way to make it work.

mmmmm…..salsa